What's next?
Minjae agrees
I agreed. Of course I did, Haeun not only giving the wretch I am a second chance, but also offering to fulfil my deviant fantasies. I couldn't believe my luck. I don't even know why she was doing it for me, when I've already betrayed her trust so thoroughly. The disgust I had felt for myself still lingered, but the anticipation of what was about to happen dulled the pain, just a little bit.
“That’s good,” I said, forcing a smile into my voice. “I’m glad he’s open to it.”
“I want to keep you involved,” she continued. “But he insists that I take it seriously, and that means... well, being in love with him. Not like us, of course, but also not casual. And just for tonight, just this first time… I think it’s best if we kept it private."
The words hit me like a slow-moving train, their weight sinking into my chest. My grip on the phone tightened. “Private?” I repeated, my voice quieter than I intended.
“Yes,” she said gently, almost apologetically. “Just this once. I promise.”
The idea of her and Jihoon—intimate, alone—sent a jolt through my body. It wasn’t just jealousy. It was something darker, something twisted and shameful. The thought of not knowing, of being on the outside looking in, was a strange kind of torment, but one that stirred something deep inside me.
I closed my eyes, letting her words settle over me. “I understand,” I managed, though my voice sounded strained to my own ears.
“Are you sure?” she asked. “If this is too much, too soon—”
“No,” I interrupted, surprising myself with the firmness of my tone. “No, it’s okay. I trust you.”
She exhaled softly, and I imagined her smile, soft and relieved. “Thank you, Joonie. This means a lot to me.”
I nodded, even though she couldn’t see. “I love you,” I said, the words raw and vulnerable.
“I love you, too.”
As we hung up, an odd mixture of emotions swirled within me. Anticipation, fear, excitement, shame. But above it all, a deep and aching love for Haeun, a love that was as twisted as it was true.
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