Keeping things short…

“Umm…. Sir, our dragon on **** Mountain has been killed!” Said Phil as Ganondorf swiveled his chair around and looked at Phil…

“Oh yeah, tell him, his…. Pfttt…… Fired!!”

“What?”

“Hahahahha…. You get it….. it’s cuz he’s in a volcano!!”

“Yep I get it….. your an inspiration to everyone with a dads sense of humor!”

“I know….. now where’s this little trouble maker gone now!!”

“Hard to say…. But we do have a meeting with the Weather Mistresses soon at the Grudo Camp….”

“Ahhh yes…. The tribe I dropped out of….”

“You mean left?”

“Yess I dropped out, they let me in…. Then I let myself out!!”

“That….. whatever…. Alright…. Look, do the right thing here and take control of the situation…. Or this whole castle will fall!!”

“I can’t…. Not until I get that damn Triforce of Power in the palm of my fucking hand!!”

“It’s been 7 years let it go…..!”

“Well I’ll waste another 7 years finding it or **** to you…. Your parents, your son, your other son, your doctor, your aunt, her pets…..”

“God, sometimes I wonder how the fuck, he managed to take over the whole kingdom….. when he probably can’t even take out a fucking woman!”

“Hey, are you tuning out my threats here?!”

“Umm…. No.”

“Good….. I was worried you wouldn't care enough…. Anyways…. I want you to go stalk this person who’s taking down all my temples here!!”

“Sir, please…. That sounds so wrong…”

“Of course, it’s wrong…… we’re villains…. Especially the ones that **** heroes for fun…. Speaking of which…. Why don’t you go ahead and kidnap them so I can go do that!”

“Yes sir….” Said Phil as he walked off….

Link and Sheik go to….

1.) Water Temple

2.) Shadow Temple…