Joan, "Who could possibly be attracted to a saggy old body like mine?"

Joan never really cared about her appearance. Being a single mother never afforded her that luxury.

Between caring for her kids and working at the steel mill, business came before pleasure and pleasure came before appearance.

She kept her hair short and out of the way, indulged in fast food a little too much and her vocabulary had been tainted a deep blue. One of the guys, so to speak.

With that attitude in mind, she could never fathom the idea of being a sex object, seeing herself the same as Foreman Frank. She was too drunk to remember who she conceived the twins with, and too Catholic to make the mistake of aborting her little bundles of joy. But as happy as she was being a mother, her life had become endless work with zero time to consider herself.

Some women become exhibitionists out of excessive self-love, Joan became one out of excessive self-apathy.

Joan's two boys Greg and Tommy had been spending their Saturday morning gaming in the living room, only to be interrupted by their mother, fresh from the shower, beer-can in hand and not a towel or stitch of clothing in sight.

"Hey Boys! Whatcha playin?"

"Oh Jesus Christ, Mom! Put some clothes on!" Her Boys said, practically in unison.

"Ohooh, Noooooo Way. Way too hot out for anything more than my birthday suit." Joan flopped onto the couch, in between her sons, opening her beer with a loud *CRACK*

"*siiiiip* AH! Besides, I'm your Mom, It's not like there's anything you haven't seen before. And what's there to see? These giant saggy boobies? This big wobbly beer belly, that puts Foreman Frank's to shame? Or what about this bush? I mean Jesus, look at all this hair. It's like i'm not even naked. I know boys your age like 'em young, thin and smooth, so there's really no need to be embarrassed when i'm the total opposite. Just think of me like another guy in the locker room." Joan put her beer down between her fat thighs, stretched her arms around her sons' shoulders and pulled them in for a damp, jiggly hug.

Joan pulled her beer from her bush for another sip. "*siiiii-ACK* *COUGH* *COUGH* *cough *cough* Bleeeeh. got a pube on my tongue... Damn. Now i gotta piss. Seeing as the rose bushes are looking a little wilted... uh, i'll be back in a few minutes." Joan got up and walked out the front door without a moment of hesitation, despite being completely naked.

The Boys groaned, both trying to hide their shameful erections from each other, Wondering what the hell are they going to do about their mother's shamelessness. Only to be interrupted by the squeaking of their mother's fat ass on the front window, moaning in relief as she "watered" the garden. Unable to do anything but stare as her cheeks parted, fully exposing her winking asshole while she waved to the Mailman, "Mornin' Paul!"