Jeremy and Harleen

"Wait, you’re telling me the Joker was my dad?"

You are Jeremy White, an 18-year-old high school senior. Your mother, Jeannie White, raised you alone, always telling you that your father, John Oswald White, was a failed comedian who died in a chemical accident before you were born.

"That can’t be right! You’ve got the wrong guy. My dad was John Oswald White. He died before I was born. Some chemical accident in Gotham-"

"Nope." The pale blonde woman across from you pops the ‘p’ with a smirk. "I checked everything twice - birth records, DNA, the works. You’re Mister J’s kid, junior."

Her grin is wide, too wide. Her platinum blonde hair is tied up in pigtails, and her red-and-black leather costume clings to her like a second skin, leaving her pale midriff and legs bare. The woman in front of you is Harley Quinn - Joker’s sidekick turned girlfriend turned wife. Now, she’s his widow.

"The whole ‘dying years ago in Gotham’ thing?" She waves a hand dismissively. "That’s just the bedtime story your momma fed ya. The truth? Your daddy was the Clown Prince of Crime himself. The one and only Joker. And you-" she jabs a finger at your chest- "you’re his kid. His legacy. His heir."

It feels like the ground has been yanked out from under you. "No. No way. This is insane. I’m just... I’m just a normal guy. I’m not- I can’t be-"

"Oh, but you are," Harley purrs, leaning back in the booth like she owns the place. "You’re his, alright. And now that Puddin’s gone, it’s time for you to step up. Take his place. Be the new Joker."

Your stomach churns. "Take his place? Are you crazy? I don’t want to be a supervillain! I don’t want anything to do with... with him!"

Harley tilts her head, pigtails swaying. "Aw, don’t be like that, junior. You got his looks, his charm... hell, you probably got his sense of humor too, buried under all that angst. All you need is a little push. And lucky for you, I’m real good at pushin’."

Her grin stretches wider, sharp and knowing. "You look just like Puddin', just younger, with normal skin and hair. I started lookin’ for you right after your dad croaked. Figured it was time for you to take his place."

You shake your head, heart pounding. "There’s no way I can be the Joker!"

The Joker wasn’t just some criminal - he was Gotham’s nightmare. A **** of chaos. A lunatic in purple who made even Batman flinch. And you? You’re just a normal teenager. There’s no way you could take his place.

"I don’t want to be a supervillain!"

Harley’s smirk deepens. She leans in close, voice dropping to a husky whisper.

"Tell me somethin’, junior. You got a girlfriend?"

You blink. "What? No. But what’s that got to do with anything?"

Her eyes glimmer with mischief. "Well, if you agree to be the new Joker, you can fuck me. Anytime you want."

Your breath catches. Heat floods your face.

She winks, slow and sultry. "Whaddya say? Wanna take your daddy’s place? Both in Gotham and-" her voice drops to a teasing purr- "inside me?"