It's a war-zone... if you could call it a war.

Ok, so you may have been particularly bored when you came across Earth. Mind shatteringly bored, enough to give you PTSD flashbacks of your time on your home-world. So you were particularly keen for some action and you admit, in retrospect, you maaaay have been a bit overzealous in stirring up some trouble.

You several hundred humans, learned basically everything about them over the course of a few earth weeks, and continued to ravenously absorb all discernible knowledge as you fought against the tides of madness threatening your consciousness. Your processing power wasn't like other races, you were always part of a much greater whole but you hadn't been united since your inception on that godforsaken rock. As such, it was a bit of a guessing game what any particular "node" of yourself was doing at any given moment. A sizable portion of you had elected to study the humans and you'd learned an incredible amount: it was 1992, their technology was just starting to kick off into a new era, some of them were at least trying to unify and equalize their many cultures. Exploring their cerebral cortex had been a rare treat: There was so much emotion and passion flying around in there even they weren't sure what they wanted! It was like a dream come true, a strong will built upon intelligence but undermined by a strong emotional drive. But it just kept getting better! They were highly varied, individual to individual, nothing like the almost clone-like Angali. And they were sexual! It was like every one of your wishes had been granted in these wonderful creatures.

You had discovered sexuality some time ago firsthand in the Kasull, a race of amphibious dog-like creatures who were living in a myriad of strict feudal systems on their marshy home-world. You had been fascinated by the social discrepancy between the males and females, the females ruled their queendoms with an iron fist. Considering you were basically a homogenous soup of cells the mere idea of variety was glorious and you had (still did really) a tremendous amount of fun with the Kasull.

Unfortunately, some of your nodes weren't content to observe and learn: they wanted to incite and excite the planet so they'd really have something to observe. One node unleashed a plague of your modified cells, spread through sexual contact, that caused over-expression of feminine characteristics in both human sexes. Another released modified Kasull males onto the continent known as South America armed with viral enhancements that allowed them to breed with human females. A third node implanted a Golgothi hive in the middle of North Korea, heavily modified so that it didn't spread and devour the continents ecosystem in a matter of days. These three were the "mad" nodes, you vaporized every last bit of them from orbit, not wanting to re-assimilate whatever insanity overtook them.

Particularly the Golgothi-node. Fuck that guy. Golgothi were a fungoid race of highly evolved assimilating machines: To humans, in their adult phase they appear as grey, kilometer tall, leafless trees that could weather pretty much any meteorologic event a life-bearing planet could throw at them. In their juvenile stage they were a much bigger threat, highly mobile snake/worm/dragonfly analogues that moved in devouring swarms across the planet. Fortunately the mad node had diminished their spreading capacity significantly by removing their wings, reducing their carnivorous tendencies, and adapting their reproductive cycle so that they could not reproduce without hosts for the eggs. Namely humans.

Both the Golgothi and the Kasull were significant "threats" to the humans (they were percieved as threats at least), neither was anywhere near as virulent as the feminizing plague that spread across the globe. Australia, Africa, Canada, and most island nations were somewhat effectively halting the spread of femininity. Everywhere else? Not so much. Some nations had suffered a complete extinction of masculine males in the population though most were somewhere in between. Those who contracted it experienced an intense surge of alien-enhanced hormones that redistributed fat on their bodies to their hips and chest with a side effect of impairing their higher thinking till their body adjusted. The loss of body hair, reshaping of facial features, and shifting muscle mass followed soon after.

You may not have come in peace per se, but you felt at least a little guilty for how badly you fucked up this planet for only being there a few years. That being said, it wasn't like you sent in shock troops to kill off the Kasull or an extermination squad to take care of the Golgothi. You worked with various world governments from the shadows to give them a fighting chance (after you shut down their multiple attempts to drive the whole planet into nuclear winter) and then you watched from high above. Because damn was it entertaining.