It's Abu Musab al-Khalayleh!

"Hey! Who goes there?" a mysterious figure in the shadows demands to know. The English is broken, and unclear, possibly even more so than Khalid's.

A white man steps out of the bushes brandishing an **** rifle. Khalid immediately throws his hands into the air and pleads with the man not to shoot.

"Who are you?" the man asks again, looking like he wouldn't tolerate asking a third time.

"I am Khalid Ali," Xhul'gar answers, "from Somalia." Upon hearing this, the man turns his weapon away and ushers the alien into the brush. There, in the sanctuary of the...shrubs...Khalid is amazed to see a huge cache of...marshmallows.

"You must be my contact," the other man says, stuffing his face with the fluffy white morsels. "I am Abu Musab al-Khalayleh. Did you bring any food?"

Khalid shakes his head, "No." Abu Musab al-Khalayleh swallows his load, only to replace it with another.

"I'm so hungry. It's about time you got here. Why did Osama send me a Somali? No matter. All peoples under Allah shall be united against the Great Satan, whether they be Somali or American." Abu consumes another dozen marshmallows and then hands the confused Khalid a spare AK47. "Take this. Let's do this right now. You know the plan? Any last minute questions?"

Khalid, of course, has several questions, but there's one in particular that is bothering him. "You are an American?" he inquires of the white man.

"Yes," the man replies.
"Americans speak English?"
"Yes, of course," says Abu, incredulous.
"Why is your English so bad?"
"My mouth is full of marshmallows, Idiot. Now enough questions. Let's go."