In my desk drawer, there's a tailor's tape.

At a solid, fat six inches soft. I've been the envy of most guys I meet in the locker room showers since middle school. Early on, I was a little ashamed of my size and would try to hide it by wearing baggy pants or avoiding the showers. As I've grown older and fucked more guys, I've been learning to love my size. I love the way guys comment on it and talk about how jealous they are. Hard, it's always been about seven inches long and 6 inches around, well over average. I'v always loved the way it starts fat at the base and widens toward the middle of my shaft like a surfboard, culminating in a huge knob that's wider than all the rest.

The behemoth jutting out from my groin is definitely my dick. It has the same shape, the same long vein down its side.

It's just a lot bigger. It looks about three inches wide. I wrap the measuring tape around the middle of my shaft. Christ, it's eight and a quarter inches around.

I can't help it; I moan and my hips jerk forward, a huge stream of pre rushes out and pools at the floor. Apparently, I'm so into myself I can bring myself to the edge just by knowing my own measurements. Surely no one else on earth carries a monster as fat as mine.

I wonder how long?

I unroll the tape slowly, amazed. The eight inch mark seems barely over halfway. Twelve inches. Thirteen inches. Fourteen inches. Fourteen and a half inches long.

Magnificent.

My nuts churn. Whoah! Didn't I say they looked like apples a minute ago? They seem like oranges now.

Dropping the measuring tape, I grab my trembling cock with both hands and start to stroke. I don't need lube, my cock provides an ample supply of its own. I go slowly, relishing the feel of the monster in my hands. I trace my fingers along its veiny protrusions, willing myself to hold back. My breath is ragged. I won't last much longer.

I sit down on the floor in front of the mirror and spread my legs; my balls rest on the cool floor. In this position my cock comes up nearly to my collar bone.

I wonder...