Ignore it

You ignore it. It’s probably just a squirrel or something.

You’re still caught up in the afterglow, looking down at your exhausted, supremely satisfied girlfriend with pride and love.

THWACK!

What was that…

“URGH!” All thought is wiped out by excruciating pain exploding in your groin, lancing up into your stomach and making your abs spasm. You roll off of Katie and move your hands down to your groin to protect your violated testicles.

As your hands touch your scrotum, new javelins of pain shoot through you and your stomach churns as you probe. Where once were two plump family jewels there is now an ill-defined mush. As the horror of what you discover sinks in, you see a punk kid run off with a slingshot, laughing gleefully. You curl into a ball and slowly fade to black as you hear Katie calling your name “Oh my god, Jacob, are you all right? What happened? Oh god, your balls…I’ll call an ambulance!”…