I like panties

I'm really struggling to answer. I can feel my self burning up as my thoughts become focused on my deepest and most repressed desires. I want to express thes ethoughts that have been with me so long, but I feel so **** at the mere thought of saying these forbidden things aloud.

Rachel can see me turmoil. 'It's okay baby, you can share with me" switching her grip to wrap her hand around my cock adn gently, ever so gently, stroking my cock up and down with the just the right amount of pressure to both calm me and excite my cock.

"It's okay baby, this is a safe place... you can tell Rachel what turns you on" lifting a hand up to cup the back of my head and slowly pull my unresisting head down to her breast. Starting to run her fingers through my hair to pacify me as she continues to stroke my cock to hardness. "Shhh..." pulling down her top to expose her breast and pushing my mouth towards her nipple "there you go baby, suck on me and relax" stroking, gently and lovingly. I can feel myself drifting off into subspace...

"Shhh... tell me what it is that turns you on baby... and I'll make you feel sooooo good."

"I.... I... I like...."

"Yes baby.... what do you you like" tell me and I will make you feel good baby..."

"I like panties." and it was in the open. I had said it to someone else.

"You like sexy, girly panties, my sweet" she coo'd. Her voice didn't betray the shock on her face, and I was nuzzled in her breasts so didn't see it. Her voice remained sugar sweet "What else do you like my sweet little thing"

"I want to be girly" it came out of my mouth before I realised I said it. My head shot up and I looked into Rachel's eyes. All I saw back was caring as she continued to stroke my cock. I could feel my orgasm starting to slowly build...

"You want to wear panties. You want to be a sissy for your Mistress Helen?"

"Yes" hesitation...

"You want more than that?"

"Yes" a flat monotone response... unable to look her in the eye...

"You want to be a girl?"

"No, not that!" slightly indignant, hot blush flushing my cheeks...

"But you ARE jealous of girls, aren't you?"

"Yes", a whisper

"Because you want breasts?"

"Yes", barely audible...

"You want to have breasts and be girly...?"

"Yes"

"you want to be a girly shemale for your Helen?"

A nod, I can't speak. A sharp squeeze of my balls "Answer Mistress Rachel sissy!" sharp but not harsh, whispered in my ear. I am so close I can smell her perfume, I am on the edge of cumming, I am so submissive...

"Yes Mistress"

"You want to be a little submissive, cuckolded sissy husband, with a dominant Mistress for a wife, who does everything she commands!"

"Yes Mistress" looking into her eyes in wonder that she had read me so well and got me to confess

"Well Sissy, come for Mistress Rachel and I will make all your fantasies come true"

and as she took her hand away from my cock, I came, but without the pumping my cock just leaked the cum out with no **** and no pleasure. It was my first, but unlikely to be my last, ruined orgasm.

"There, there Sissy" cupping my head to her breast, Rachel held me.