I give it the old college try.

I did my best to look flustered, before nodding to indicate that yes, I would try. My intentions for her certainly didn’t end with a kiss, but it was a good first step to getting into my math tutor’s panties. I took the pencil and notebook back from her and wrote a few random numbers underneath her squiggle, before looking hopefully up from the page with a hopeful expression. Ashley shook her head.

“Are you even trying?” She pointed to the page, took the pencil from my hands, and circled a few of the numbers I’d put down. The notebook was still in my hands as she did this, which meant she had to lean towards me, and I suspect the way her breast was pressing against my arm was fully intentional. We each took one more turn scribbling in the notebook, Ashley giving judgmental grunts and sighs all the while, before she decided that I’d successfully solved her puzzle, at which point I put the notebook on the table triumphantly.

“See,” She asked, “Was that so hard?” I managed to shake my head and reply that no, it was not really that hard, but before she could collect the notebook again and give me another exercise, I perked up, pretending to remember her promise.

“Hey!” I said, excitedly, “Doesn’t this mean that I earned that kiss?” Ashley rolled her eyes, but she leaned towards me and placed a quick kiss on my cheek before bouncing back onto the couch next to me. I did my best to look crestfallen and moody. “Ash! That’s not a real kiss.”

Ashley raised an eyebrow at this. “I didn’t say what kind of kiss.” This hurt me most of all, and I gave her my biggest, saddest puppydog eyes. “No fair, Ash. Next time it’s going to be a real kiss, on the mouth, no tricks.”

She looked slightly taken aback at this, and scoffed at me. “Next time?”

I nodded back. “Yeah, give me another problem, and I’ll do better.” I picked up my notebook from the table, and shoved it back in her direction. Ashley seemed to think for a moment, then eventually rolled her eyes and said “Fine.” When she handed the notebook back to me, I almost laughed. My next math equation, it seemed, was “THIS IS DUMB BUT REALLY HOT.”

I nodded thoughtfully, underlined “HOT,” gave a strained hum, circled REALLY, and wrote “YEP.” Confident that I had the right answer, I handed the notebook back to Ashley. She examined it for a moment, and gave a look of surprise. “Wow. You got it on the first try.”

I beamed as best I could. It was all a matter of motivation. Now to claim my prize.