Hit the Ground and Roll

The statement was a bit of a shock. Sure, Jimmy had known gay classmates in school, but he had never had anyone close to him come out. He turned his head and looked out at the window. He was uncomfortable with Joe’s admission, and at the moment wanted nothing more than to be at rehearsal and away from the conversation. Jumping out of the car would have been impractical, but

“Why did you feel like you had to just come out and say that?” he asked.

“Well,” Joe sighed. “We are pretty good friends, I think, and I don’t like keeping secrets. Eventually you would have met Tyler, so I wanted you to know what to expect.”

“I understand, but why at this particular moment?”

Perhaps Jimmy had been a bit too aggressive in his query, because a tear formed in the corner of Joe’s eye. “It just felt right,” he said. “I guess it was too soon.”

They spent the rest of the ride in an uncomfortable silence, and during the rehearsal, they spoke only about the show, and after the rehearsal Jimmy made an excuse to ask Mark for a ride home, which he did willingly.

He was sweaty from the rehearsal, so he stripped quickly and started the water. Before he could get in, however, there was a firm knock on his door. Cursing, he wrapped himself in a towel and went to the door to see who was there. Looking through the peephole, he saw Joe. He took a deep breath and opened the door.

“You know,” Joe started. “You were pretty shitty to me today. That was entirely uncalled for.” He seemed completely oblivious as to what Jimmy wasn’t wearing.

He continued. “I opened myself up to you, and you completely shut me down. We were entirely friendly up to that moment, and you were completely out of line.”

Jimmy was taken aback. His head drooped, and his shoulders slumped. He hadn’t been scolded like this in years, since an assistant principal had caught him and a few friends smoking in the boy’s bathroom. Words failed him.

Joe kept up his tirade, still not looking directly at Jimmy. “What do you have to say for yourself?”

“I’m sorry.” The words hung in the air. For the moment, the world slowed.

Joe looked at Jimmy, and then began laughing.

Jimmy’s forehead wrinkled as though he was trying to solve a calculus problem. “What is so funny?”

Joe stifled his giggles. “I fully came over here to yell at you, but I never imagined I would have caught you like this.” He pointed to the towel. “I guess you were not expecting company.”

“No, I wasn’t,” Jimmy said through a widening smile. “I was trying to get cleaned up. I am sorry about the way I reacted. I do consider us friends, and I want to stay friends. I behaved badly. I guess its because I have no real experience. You hit me with a dose of reality, and I acted like a kid.”

They sat down on the couch.

“What do you mean you have no real experience?” Joe asked.

“Well, I have dated a couple of girls, but nothing serious ever happened.”

Joe nodded. “I see. So you are telling me you are a virgin?”

Jimmy blushed. “Yes.”

“Are you only into girls?”

Another blush. “Yes. I think so. Maybe?”

Joe laughed. It was charming. “That is an interesting answer. What do you mean?”

It was Jimmy’s turn to be honest. “Well, because I was a bit of the quiet, weird, nerdy kid, and didn’t date much, a lot of my classmates thought I was gay. I never put too much stock in what they said, but it has always been in the back of my mind. Could I be? I mean, I like girls, but I’m not turned off by the idea of being with a guy. Does that make me gay?”

Joe’s attention never wavered. “Jimmy, we have all been at that place. Trying to decide which path we are supposed to be on. Nothing says you have to figure it out in a minute.”

“I know I have time. That is probably why I reacted. You are confident in where you are, and it made me feel uneasy. I don’t know where I fit.”

Joe was silent for a moment. When he did speak, he said, “I would like to do something for you. Do you want to try a new experience?”

Jimmy’s throat suddenly went dry. His stomach turned butterflies. But despite his nervousness, he heard himself say, “Yes.”

Joe moved closer to Jimmy on the couch. He put his left and on Jimmy’s cheek and turned the younger mans face toward him. He leaned in and kissed Jimmy. It was slow at first, but as Jimmy relaxed, Joe became more assertive. Jimmy felt Joe’s tongue on his. Joe’s hand moving from jimmy’s face to his chest, to his waist.

Joe pulled away and smiled. “How was that?”

Jimmy’s head was swimming. It was a great kiss. “Um, that was pretty good.”

“I agree,” Joe said. “It sounds to me like you are at least open to trying things.”

“Um.” Jimmy was a little flustered. “Yeah. Um. Maybe. I guess so.” Where the hell did his ability to speak disappear to?

Joe stood up. “Well, from here, we have two choices. We can part ways and start fresh tomorrow. I’ll pick you up for rehearsal at the usual time. Or we can keep trying new things. I think you should decide.”