Hesitation

As I looked at everyone else putting their hands in, I went to go put mine in, but there was something that tugged at my heart. Shayna and Mark didn’t notice, but Rose and Regina definitely saw that I hadn’t joined in the cheer.

“Something wrong, hero?” Rose said as she turned to me. “You didn’t say a team name.”

“Oh, um, it’s nothing,” I said as I nervously rubbed my arm.

“You know you can’t lie to me, right?” Regina said, casually putting her elbow on my shoulder. “You hung up on Pussycat? That’s what eating at you?”

“I did absolutely no eating of any sort!” Faux Paws said as pounded her fist against the side of the cage. “And can I get some damn clothing?”

“I’m sure we’ll find a nice jumpsuit or something for you,” Rose said with a snicker, leaning up against the cage.

“I just… need some time and some air,” I said as I started to walk away from the group. “Hey, how do I get out of here?”

“Two lefts and take a ladder,” Mark said, gesturing the path that I should take.

With that, I headed off. Very quickly afterwards, I heard the sounds of someone following me. I turned to see that familiar cotton candy pink hair following me. “I said I need some time, Regina.”

“Well, yeah. I mean, those three can be a lot,” Regina said with a chuckle. “Come on, let’s go find a bit to hang and just chill.”

“I need time alone, Regina,” I said, trying my best to outpace her, already having reached the ladder.

“Oh, don’t be like that,” she said, very clearly below me and admiring my ass. After a bit, I heard her climbing up after me. “You know you love my company.”

“Regina, seriously,” I said as I reached the surface, the wind hitting me in the face. It was already the next day as the birds circled above me. “I just need time alone.”

Regina popped up out of the ground and brushed herself off. “Come on, what’s really eating at you? You know you can tell me.” I just started walking in a direction that I was pretty sure was towards town. “Alright, fine. We’ll just walk.” I didn’t say anything else for a bit. “You know, it’s, like, 30 miles or so back to town, right?”

“Ugh,” I said with a heavy sigh. I focused on both Regina and I and teleported us back to a random alleyway back in town. As soon as we landed, I stumbled back a bit from how light my head was feeling.

“Hey, easy there,” Regina said, rushing to my side. “You still haven’t had much practice with the Ring, nor have you really charged it. Take it easy.” I tried to move, but Regina held me in place. “No no no, you aren’t going anywhere until you start talking to me. Come on, what’s wrong?” Her expression had shifted from playfully annoyed to concerned.

“I just…” I softly started, “What am I doing?”

Regina gently let go of holding me down. “What are you talking about?”

“****! Fleeing! Not stopping any villains!” I said, slamming my fist into the wall, leaving a small dent. “Ever since I got this ring and these powers, I have done things FAR from what a hero should be doing. In the last two days, I have helped kidnap two people, one of which being one of the 12, and am keeping her locked in a cage in some abandoned den on the outskirts of town!”

Regina shrugged. “So you had a rough start. So what?”

“Regina, you don’t get it,” I said, starting to walk out to the sidewalk and just wandering aimlessly. “I have admired heroes for years, wanting to be one. And then when I finally am, I start by ****. What kind of a hero am I?”

“Um, I think the term is fledgling,” Regina said, scratching her head. “Or you could go with rookie.”

“That’s not the point,” I said as I continued walking. “I haven’t been acting very heroic.”

“Then, just start acting like one?” Regina said, “I don’t see what’s so hard. You were so excited to start being a hero on the first night. So what if you’ve flubbed up a bunch at the start?” She turned her head towards where we were heading. “Huh, neat. There’s a river. I love bridges.”

“Because this Ring is far more powerful than anything any other hero has had before!” I shouted at her, spinning on my heels and facing her. I looked around at the onlookers watching me before they went back to their own business. For extra reassurance, I put a muffle barrier within us, keeping our conversation quiet and the rest of the world quiet for us. I hissed at Regina in a hushed tone. “The 12 are compromised with someone far bigger than them, and I’m just a blogger who is a fangirl.”

“Shouldn’t this be a dream come true?” Regina asked.

“It should be,” I said as I turned and continued walking. “But, seeing Mark and Shayna and Rose trying to work together and come up with a team name, suddenly everything that we’d have to do hit me like a truck.”

“I still don’t get it,” Regina said, following me further. “Hera, why are you so hesitant to do this? Do you think that you can’t? Is that it? That’s why we practice and-”

“Regina, I’m not worthy!” I shouted, spinning on my heels again and facing her. “I’m just a blogger and a fan. I don’t have the training. I don’t have the experience. I don’t have the qualifications to be a hero to take down someone who has usurped the 12!” I sighed loudly and put my face in my hands. “I thought that I’d just be handling some minor villains that, at worst, maybe rob a bank or cause some minor trouble. I have all these expectations and responsibilities and I don’t know if I can live up to them.”

“That’s what you’re worried about?” Regina said as she came up and gently patted me on the shoulder. “Hera, I’ve seen you. You have a hero inside of you, and this is the time that-”

“If I’m such a hero, then why can’t I save Felicia!?” Tears were practically streaming down my face. “I tried, Regina! I tried! But I’m not strong enough to use a damn device that can alter reality to free someone from mind control!” I did feel one tear leak out and run down my cheek. “I couldn’t fight and I couldn’t save her! What kind of hero am I?”

Suddenly, Regina’s arms wrapped around me. “Oh, Hera.” Her tone was gentle and soft. She stroked the back of my head, comforting me. “You’re putting so much pressure on yourself. I know it’s a big responsibility and you suddenly feel the weight on your shoulders. Just know that I’m always going to be here for you.” She pulled back a little and gently kissed me on the lips. “You’re stuck with me, whether you like it or not, so I’d suggest getting to like me.”

I chuckled and smiled a little at her. “I do like you Regina.” I rested my forehead against her neck. “Could you hold me close again? When you hold me, it feels like I won’t be such a failure.”

The next thing I knew, Regina put her hands on the front of my shoulders. Then, with all her strength, she shoved me. Not expecting it, I was utterly launched back into the air. It was as if everything was in slow motion. My confusion turned to anger at her rejecting the hug. I needed her right now and she decided to push me away and practically throw me.

Then, anger turned to concern as I saw her expression. It was utterly filled with fear. Coming through the ground and grabbing onto her were figures that looked to be made of stone. Cracks in their bodies began to glow in a fiery light. Her arms may have been outstretched from pushing me away, but it looked almost like she was reaching towards me.

“REGINA!”

Then, the figures detonated, launching me even further back towards the middle of the bridge. I landed on the ground, rolling until I slammed into a car. I groaned and tried to come to my senses.