Head straight to your dorm.

As hungry as you are, you're eager to get settled in and meet your roommate. Maybe you can get something to eat together once you're unpacked.

You walk back outside and look across the street. There is a large building that looks like a castle. In front is a fountain with a beautiful marble statue of a gorgeous, ancient-Greek looking woman. Her robe is draped around her very loosely and one breast is completely uncovered.

That must be Hera, you think to yourself. You walk over to the building past the statue and enter the building. As soon as you open the door you hear a burst of noise. You are at the end of a hallway with about ten rooms on it. Most of them have their doors open and there are loud noises coming from everyone of them. Loud techno music is playing, you hear the sounds of video games coming from one room, laughter is coming from everywhere, you even hear shrieks that sound suspiciously like people having sex coming from the closed door right next to you with the number 71 on it. There are also papers that say Lora and Doug on the door.

That's odd, you think. I guess these must be coed dorms.

You double check your key, it has the number 69 on it. Which means that your room is the one right next to the sex room. You think briefly about whether or not it will be awkward to meet your next door neighbor after hearing what you are hearing right now. Before you spend too much time thinking about it, a guy and a girl burst out of one of the rooms further down the hall. They are both point heavy duty Nerf guns in your direction and launch a barrage of darts at you. But the weirdest thing about it is that they are both practically naked.

The guy is one of the largest most muscular guys you have ever seen. He is wearing a large cowboy hat and tighty whitey underwear that barely hides a dick that clearly matches the rest of his body. The girl is tall and skinny, she is wearing a hot pink sports bra, athletic style panties, and over-sized sunglasses that have think pink frames the same color as her bra.

One of the darts hits you in the face.

"Twenty points for hitting the new kid!" The guy yells and they run into a different room in the hall, shooting their guns at a target in that room.

I hope he's not my roommate, you think as you collect yourself. This place seems really weird.

You walk up to room 69. There are two papers on the door. One says Andrew and the other says Emily.

You are surprised to see a feminine name on the door. The fact that you may have a girl for a roommate had never even crossed your mind. The door is cracked, and there appears to be a light on inside.