He just wants to be alone

"Thanks, man, but I think I just want to be alone tonight," he said after a brief pause. "I really appreciate the offer, though."

After some small talk, he got out of my car and walked away. I found myself with the most awkward case of blue balls in history.

As I was pulling out of the parking lot, I phoned Susan to fill her in on what had just happened. When I was done she giggled.

"You know, you could still take care of him," she said. "I'm sure if Meg showed up at his house for a second round of breakup sex, he wouldn't turn her away. It might even give her some closure."

I was a bit surprised by her suggestion.

"You want me to pretend to be the transwoman who just broke his heart so I can have sex with him?" I asked.

"Honestly, the thought of you taking it up the ass from a real man is kinda hot," she said. "In this case you could also help Mike get some closure."

It was dark and twisted...but I was also horny enough to consider the idea.

"I could meet you at the mall and help pickout a sexy booty call outfit that fits her," Susan continued. "Then you can drop by his place and see what happens."