He can't, and his roommate isn't alone

I spin wildly in bed, arms and legs flailing around, until I fall out onto my ass. I groan in pain as I realize that my ass is going to be red and sore. Still, I'm thankful I hadn't landed on my dick. THAT would have hurt.

I shoot to his feet to see my roommate, a 6 ft tall man who looked like he could've been on the football team, is standing in the doorway with a case full of beer in his hands. The man looks shocked and sickened at what he is seeing. "Dude, where the hell are your pants?! What kind of guy do you think I am?!"

"It-it's not what it looks like!" I rush to cover my dick, but quickly realize I can't, bringing my arms back. I start looking for cover, but realize I can't do that either. My arms keep moving back and forth like I'm doing some weird dance.

It gets even worse as a gorgeous girl steps out from behind my roommate. She's at least my height with black hair that falls to her shoulders, a black t-shirt with an unknown rock band logo, and blue jeans. Her breasts stick out from her shirt, making me wonder if she's wearing a bra.

She stars at me with her mouth slightly open and gives me a once-over. "Damn dude, you should've told me you have this kind of show for visitors. I'd have come around more often!"

My roommate scowls and turns around. "I'll set up in the quad. We'll hang there."

"Sure," says the girls. "I'll be right there."

She watches him leave and waits before closing the door. She turns to me and beams with an extraordinary smile. I try to find something to say. "I-I'm sorry about your..."

"Don't be," she says. "Your roommate Dan is a prick and a dumbass. I only came because he managed to get some beer. If anything, you saved my ass."

"Oh...no problem," I say.

"Sexy scholarship?" She asks.

I look at her in confusion. "You know about that?"

"Oh please! EVERYONE knows about that! Only dumbasses like Dan don't! Tells you all you need to about his intelligence, right?"

I look away in shame. "Oh. Yeah. Only idiots."

When I turn back, the girl is now wearing an expression of shame. "Oh shit! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to..."

"No, no, you're right," I say. "I should've read the stupid pamphelt."

"Still, it was a shitty thing to say," she says, stepping forward. "Let me start over. I'm Veronica. It's nice to meet you."

She extends a hand and I shake it without hesitation. Somehow, I feel extremely relaxed around this woman. "I'm Jack. The pleasure is mine."

Her eyes drift down to my crotch again, and I somehow don't feel the need to cover in front of her. She starts to smile again. "Enjoying yourself?"

"Uh...not really sure just yet."

"Hey, I know you can't get rid of those on your own. Want me to help out?"