Give A Real Suggestion

With the attention of the others around the table, you launch into your question: “You’re a girl, Mal, so of course all the guys you’ve dated have been horny when you’ve wanted action. But guys have sex drives off the charts, so they tend to masturbate even in relationships, whereas that need can be satisfied by multiple girls if they’re single—what if the answer is that it depends on your gender?”

Helen pauses, fork halfway to her mouth, and then she lowers the utensil.

“Hey, I like that answer,” she says, but Mal shakes her head.

“You reconciled our disagreement. That’s no fun,” she complains, but a moment later, you see her typing up something on the Notes app on her phone.

“She’s plagiarising your idea,” Helen mock-whispers, and Jack snorts as if he were unimpressed.

You snatch the phone out of Mal’s hand, prepared to “chastise” her for her “academic dishonesty,” but then you read what she’s actually typed out on the phone:

Alex is a total square for giving a dumb answer.

Jack, on the other hand, is a real stud.

“Well, would you look at that,” Jack says, gesturing at the phone with delight. “Helen baited you perfectly there.”

She gives a little bow from her seat, and you scramble to save face.

“Whoa, whoa, I think you might have gotten our names mixed up,” you say, turning back to Mal. “Or are you saying I’m not a stud?”

“I don’t think I mixed anything up, Jack,” she replies to you with a wink, and the actual Jack scoffs.

“Don’t worry, we love you too, Alex,” Helen says, giving Jack a smile, and now you’re trying to figure out what she means by this—is she actually referring to you, or to Jack, or is this all just a joke that you shouldn’t be reading into?

“Oh God, am I really the white Knight now?” Jack quips, and Mal cackles in delight.

“That’s a good one,” she laughs.

“Me, a white knight?” you say, pretending to be offended.

Helen nods. “It’s ‘cause you’re a white King now, anyone can see that.”

You shovel another forkful of pasta into your mouth, ignoring the droll comment.

“So, you going to give me back my phone?” Mal asks. “I actually have to write up Alex’s answer now. The real Alex, I mean.”

“Right, forgot about that,” you say, picking up her phone again. You make a quick small edit—changing your name with Jack’s, and then pass the phone back to her.

“Wow, you had to do change it back, didn’t you,” Mal says with a roll of her eyes. She deletes all the text in one motion to clear the way for her real answer.

“Anyways, now that we have that sorted out, let’s move on to the next question,” Helen suggests, bringing out her notebook again. You see that she’s made notes on your answer on the side, before your eyes are drawn to the question she’s pointed out.

Over an hour later, you’ve all stuffed yourself on food and come to a greater understanding of economics (and sex, for whatever reason), and so you say your goodbyes to each other and part ways.

Helen +10
Mallory +10