Getting rid of a pest

When you get to class, your friend Sean welcomes you with a wide grin “Spill, who was the girl?” causing his friend Mike to shake his head in mild embarrassment at the guy “It’s called discretion, dude. Look it up. ”

“I did look it up.” Sean retorts “It’s why I didn’t join the guy at lunch when I saw he was already entertaining company.”

You sigh “Yeah. Thanks for that. But it turned out Chris doesn’t mind butting into private conversations.”

“Really?” Sean snorts “Man. That guy really IS an asshole.”

You give your two friends a recap of what happened, and the three of you – well mostly you and Sean – spend the rest of the time until the professor arrives, making cracks at the academic worth of economics-students in general and Chris in particular.

Of course, it’s mostly academic snobbery, against people who are not majoring in your chosen subject. The majority of economics majors are probably perfectly fine people. (Perfectly fine people who probably joke about computer science majors working mainly with machines because they can’t deal with people, or something along that vein. )

The class itself is… fine. Nothing too interesting, but a few of the concepts are pretty neat. Sometime halfway through your phone buzzes with the arrival of a message.

[Liz: Hi. How about we meet up around 18:00?]

[Sounds good.]

[Liz. Great! Your place or mine?]

[How about yours?]

It takes about ten minutes for her answer to arrive,

[I’ll be there. Just in case you forgot, the address is (…) ]

Seems like things are looking up, on the Elizabeth front. But that doesn’t mean Chris is off the hook for interrupting your fun. It would have been convenient if he shared your current class, but sadly that isn’t the case. On the other hand that means you get to test your power a bit more.

Once Terra has given you Chris phone number you call him up and give him a simple Choice: To forget about this question and run into you in an empty bathroom during the next hour or pretty much the same thing but with a secluded spot of the campus grounds.

And about 40 minutes later on your forth try of walking into a bathroom on a whim, you actually find Chris standing in front of the urinal. Seem you can control fate too to an extent! Damn this power is awesome!

“Hi buddy,” you are all false smiles as you walk towards him “Would you rather do whatever I tell you for the next hour or would you rather fall into a deep hypnotic trance whenever you hear me say ‘Aardvark’?” as you talk you hold up the mini-flashlight you keep on your key-chain, moving it in little circles as you shine it at Chris face, in reference to a hypnosis-themed game you once played.

“I’d rather do neither, but if I had to choose I’d rather be hypnotized. Because everybody knows that” “Aardvark” “That..” Chris eyes start to loose focus almost immediately “ ..you can’t can’t make people do an’th’ng they dnt rli wn….” his speech becomes slower and slower until it devolves into an unintelligible murmur. He sways slightly, but manages to stay on his feet.

When you ask “Chris? Can you hear me?” you get a dreamy “Yes.” in response. Perfect! Time to get to work then.

There is something you wanted to try for a while now. Namely seeing if your power can affect the past. As proven by you ‘randomly’ running into Chris here it can obviously affect probability to an extent. And seems to show little regard for conservation off mass and fundamentals of physics in general.

So far you have taken pains to avoid butterfly effects, by formulating Choices in ways that won’t radically alter someones past. But you can’t help but wonder what would happen if you did….

“Let me stop you right there.” the voice is back and it sounds... not annoyed exactly… exasperated “Yeah ad you would be exasperated to if you tried to do someone a solid and as thanks they kept piling more work at your feet. So to answer your question. Normally your choices won’t mess with the past at all. And even if you make it so the guy was never born or he was always a dog, nothing much will happen either. People he interacted with will still have made the same life-choices. The basketball team he led to victory in highchool will have still taken home the cup. And they now have these vague memories of the dog always being around. In short: Nothing much will change unless you actually try to force a butterfly effect.

Of course the process is not perfect.. All his teammates remember one of the other guys made that incredible shot from halfway across the court, but if they compared notes they’ll notice that neither of them takes credit for that throw. And that in each game their team was one member short. And then probably try not to think about it any more, for fear what that says about their mental health. And they’ll just take it for granted that the dog has always been around.

And yes you CAN get the whole altered history if you try to force it. I could have made that what happens by default, in fact. But I really wanted you to have some fun first. Let you splash around in the kiddie pool before telling you there are sharks in the water. But you keep insisting to try and swimm into deep waters, and neither of us would enjoy it if I try to shorten the leash further.

So here is the score: Did you think you were the only one with reality altering powers? If your innocent wish for some guy to have always had red hair, rewrites his family tree and wipes out some history another guy like me happens to be fond of, they might get a bit miffed. And now think about the fact that each can twist reality and stuff like poverty and wars still exist.

As far as I know no one has any interest in this city, so you are the biggest fish in the pond. Barring me. But if you make waves you better be prepared to mingle with the sharks.

And back when we first spoke I already set it up so you’ll know if you encounter a person or place another Master of Reality is personally invested in. Just like most of them will have taken steps to recognize anyone you asked ‘Would you rather….’ as claimed by another Master.

If that happens, the Etiquette is to politely leave and let the other Master go about their business. Unless you are offended, stupid or greedy enough, to risk things getting extremely messy. Sanity-shattering levels of messy.

So, take my advice and just have some fun for the time being, and worry about the big picture later.

Anyway. Congratulations: You discovered there is a Cold War for reality going on behind the scenes way sooner than I intended, and all the cosmic horror that comes along with that nugget of knowledge. If you it keeps you up at night… find a way to erase your memory or something. ”

Wow, that is a lot to stomach all at once! And in retrospect it should have been obvious. Of course there were others like you out there!

Aaaaand Chris is still standing there, swaying a bit as he stares off into space.

Hmm.

Maybe the Voice was right.

You can worry about the big picture later – and BOY will you ponder the crap out of this when lying in bed tonight – but for now there are experiments to be done.

You’ll put a pin in tampering with causality right now, though. Which means you have to take a minute to rewrite the little list of panned changes you made beforehand. You pull a sheet of paper out of your backpack and busy yourself for a few minutes devising a new set of changes that won’t mess with Chris past.

Letting people choose between to fates can be fun, but for this you want a bit more control – hence the list of things you want to happen And for that you came up with the following choice for Chris “Listen, would you rather wake up from your trance when I snap my finger but everything I say about you until then becomes the truth or would you rather wake up now but just stand there and have every statement about you read on this paper become true as soon as you read it? ”

“I’d rather wake up now?” Chris answers, before life returns to his eyes once again “What the fuck was that?”

“I just hypnotized you buddy.”

“Bullshit. That’s not how hypnosis works.” Chris gives you a look that clearly doubts your sanity, as he hastily pulls up the pants that dropped to his ankles while he was standing there.

“If you say so.” you smile and lean against a nearby wall ”By the way, would you rather read this list of commands or would you rather do whatever I say for the rest of the day?”

“You’re crazy.” Chris looks like he wants nothing more than to storm off and get away from the supposed crazy person, but the magic of your Choices to compels him to stay long enough to answer. “I’ll read you stupid list, you freak. If only to prove your hypnosis didn’t work. .”.

He snatches the list from your hand and starts skimming the first line. A moment later his dismissive demeanor is replaced by a look of mild confusion, as he starts to read much more intently.

Which would be the first line [Chris will read this list carefully from start to finish without pause].

The rest of the list goes like this:

-Chris won’t attack the author of this note.

- Chris body fits his definition of an ‘unremarkable tomboy’

- Chris clothes will shift to the nearest appropriate equivalent for his new body, while he is wearing them.

- Every time Chris hears or says the words ‘no homo’ his sexual orientation will shift to that of a heterosexual woman with a very healthy sexdrive for an hour. This effect is cumulative.

- The changes wrought by this paper will revert if Chris gets a guy to kiss him at the end of an enjoyable evening in each others company. It doesn’t need to be on the lips, as long both sides understand that this marks the conclusion of a successful date.

- Chris will not remember reading this line or any statements that follow.

-Chris hair is in a style that he’d find appropriate for an ‘unremarkable tomboy’.

- Chris will not get sexually excited by the sight of his female body.

- Chris will project his ideas about appropriate personal grooming and public decency for girls, onto his own appearance and actions while he remains female.

- Only Chris or the author of this note will be exempt from the following statements.

- Others will not notice anything different about Chris appearance and treat as if he was still the guy he was before entering this bathroom and his clothes looked like they did before being readjusted to his new body.

- If Chris confronts someone with the fact that he has a vagina, they will treat it as him showing them his extremely small dick. In a similar vein they will act as if Chris is worried about getting chubby if he points out that he has breasts now. People will dismiss any other attempts to point out that Chris is a girl now, as similar insecurities.

You watch as Chris goes from being a handsome and athletic young man to a sorta-cute athletic girl from one moment to the next. His, now ill-fitting, clothes follow suit, their cut adjusting to account for the lost inches and newly acquired (and very modest) curves.

The girl still looks a lot like Chris, just plainer and more feminine. That isn’t to say she is unattractive. She’ll just stands out less in a crowd. Literally in the way that Chris lost a few inches of height and a couple of pounds. And figuratively because her hair is a more mousy shade of brown (same for the formerly piercing blue eyes) and her whole appearance lacks the preppy, clean-cut air Chris used to have. In short: girl-Chris looks exceedingly average.

While you were inspecting the new Chris, he reached the end of your little list. And the way you formulated his Choices, it would be troublesome if anything were added to that paper, so you snatch it away as soon as Chris manages to tear her eyes away from the paper, eliciting a startled “Hey.” from the guy, as you stuff it into your pocket.

“What the fuck was that shit?!..” Chris growls as he takes a step towards you “Do you really think you can hypnotize me into wanting to be a girl?” you have instinctively taken a step back as he advances, before remembering there is nothing to fear. Buuuut...you take another step back before stopping.

“What the fuck are you grinning at?” Chris asks as he grabs the front of your shirt. In response you allow your smile to widen, point towards the sink that is now to your left, or rather the mirror above it.

You watch Chris mouth gape open as he takes in the scene reflected there. Then his eyes dip down and his free hand comes up, hovering a few inches away from the noticeable bumps under his shirt.

Then his grip on your shirt, that had slackened slightly tightens again and his head jerks up “How the fuck did you do that?” he demands.

You just grin “Hypnosis.”

“It doesn’t work like that!” Chris insists, “So, take it back. Or I swear….” he draws her other hand back in preparation of a punch.

“As we already established you are a excellent hypnosis subject. So I’d refrain from threatening me. Besides: you already know how to break the commands.”

Chris draws his balled fist back a bit and growls “Like hell am I going to do that.” and you flinch as he tenses, then…. Nothing. A moment later he tenses again, before relaxing his striking arm again.

He had you worried there for a minute! But it seems everything worked just as you intended. so that concludes this particular experiment. You raise the flashlight again as you decide “I think you need some time to think. Would you rather go and spend at least fifteen minutes inspecting your body somewhere private or would you rather go buy a properly fitted bra for yourself?”.

“I’d rather inspect myself. ” Chris decides between clenched teeth. For a second there Chris seems determined to drag you along with him, but then he finally releases your shirt and gives you the lightest of shoves. “This isn’t over.” he promises before heading towards the nearest stall.

If nothing else, the guy has guts.

“No it isn’t.” you agree under your breath, as you leave the bathroom.

But for now you are satisfied, leaving Chris in a world where only he realizes his body has changed.