For Tax Fraud!

“HOW could I POSSIBLY owe so many millions in TAX FRAUD?!! I’ve reported EVERYTHING I earned during my career, and every asset I bought with that money!”

“We’re not talking about the assets you *bought*. We’re talking about the ones…you ‘grew’.”

“…W…Wh…What?”

“*Two* very *particular* assets, Miss.”

“Your. Very. BIGGEST. Assets.”

Hitomi’s eyes slid from the agents’ faces down to her lounging shirt. Still impressively jutting, despite both the purposefully lax fit and her current horizontal positioning. Such was the nature of her legendary chest.

“Those twin towers have grown *immensely* in real, measurable worth within your professional industry since the start of your career so many years ago. But, when you retired just recently, and took your boobs “off the market”, not a single coin of Capital Gains Tax was reported or paid out to the government. And so, the law dictates that standard procedure for all tax fraud perpetrators begins with bringing them into isolated holding cells for questioning.”

Her eyes now darted back up to one agent’s face, then the other’s, desperately looking for any acknowledgement that this was a prank. They turned away, ignoring her pleading gaze, to lock eyes and nod at each other instead. Then, continuing to hold her arms sternly above her head, they simultaneously faced straight back down at her.

“You have one last chance to come out peacefully, *now*! Any further refusal to follow our instructions will be met with more forceful measures.”

Hitomi cringed at the sudden shout and meekly replied “OK…OK…I’ll come along…”. She tried to sit back up…

…and was immediately shoved down into the mattress hard, the grip on each arm tightening further.

“Your lack of any visible or verbal signals is going to be taken as resisting arrest! We will now resort to force if you do not respond immediately!”

Hitomi’s panicked confusion brought new strength to her voice. “No! I mean…yes! I mean…I’m going with you! I’m cooperating!” Hitomi tried motioning to the door with her head movements, but the agents just kept their same glaring disapproval. It was then that she noted they didn’t quite seem to be looking at “her”…