Fail miserably & assigned a task

Trillia Pov#1: "Oh & dont mind the playwright Euripides, they just trying to get your legacy famous..You may begin!" We poofed & she teleported me to Athens? "What is this place?" I wonder. "Oh & I got a list of tasks that read..1. Meet Lydia the fortune teller in the city nicknamed Thyatira which could be Avdira within Philippi & since the Nemean lion escaped, tell her to stop playing pranks on people with Pythons..that's how she got chained" biblicalarchaeology.org/daily/people-cultures-in-the-bible/people-in-the-bible/paul-and-the-****-girl-in-philippi/ greece-travel-secrets.com/Philippi.html "..that's strange..I can't stop her from doing the hobby she likes best. I tried by asking the 1st villager near "Excuse me, have you seen a girl about yay height?" They said no, I got lazy, procrastinating in the park "2.Prevent Achelous from getting to cocky of his stoning of snakes in Lake Lerna which may be Lake Vistonida since he may be the reason Hydra would attack Hercules..Reasonable but.." I couldn't find him anywhere so moving on! "3. Kill a gold horned deer pet of Apollo & Diana's in Ceryneia, just because she was being a lil b**ch to me-what?? Okay..jealousy wont get you nowhere Goddess..!" Lets be honest here the travel was way more than 50 miles from where I'm at..I didn't do it."4. Erymanthus boar-**** it..o.o so meann..& warn Pholus that..Hercules hates Centaurs because they didn't let him open the Wine Jar in peace..Yeah, no, who heard of a messenger girl these days anyway? 5.Clean cattle poo at King Augeas' stables in a single day..No f**king way"..tried but failed covered in sh*t in 10 days. "Stupid task..6.Now now, I heard word got out that you love getting covered in poo..so save the birds so they can poo you once more!" T.T I stare in disbelief my Goddess fell for such propaganda, shaking head. "7.Stop Poseidon from being a d**k to Minos..hm?" Read the extra explicit warning content in fine print of a weird predicament. "Oh-Ohh, what an asshole that Poseidon! How could he do this to the city of Crete??" Nonetheless, didn't have the confidence to.."8.Tell Hercules of Mycenae that Eurystheus made a mistake..Diomedes,King of the Thracian tribe called the Bistones. I think Goddess is playing silly with me..I'm not a messenger girl" 9.Get your butt whipped by Hera's Amazonian's belt & handle it like the good girl that you are..wait, is this really my Goddess??Who wrote this??" "10.Tell Antimache, daughter of Amphidamas of Arcadia to tell Eurystheus to tell Hercules to stop killing cattle, they're pissing off the villagers of Erythia with low food supplies to eat as it is. When will my Goddess get my memo?" "11.Bear with me here, you need to get a golden apple from Hera off her garden, there's more. Ladon may tear your clothes 100% no doubt about it, seing how naive you f**in are..Hey that's not nice..The Hesperides nymphs, daughters of Atlas will get you f**ked by their harden strapons but dont let it stop you from finding the apples in Mount Caucasus where Prometheus is chained. I dont think she gets my memo.." "12.Okokok! We get it..you're not a messenger girl as we Goddesses expected you to be *Goddess sighed in the given list*.."Finally! So round up that pretty little ass of yours & go get f**ked doggy style by Hades' 3 headed b**ch like the lil b**ch that you were ment to be you lil f**k face. Is somewhere Guarding the end of the Acheron Cave which is said to be 1 of 5 entrances to the Underworld near the waters of Taenarum in Laconia.." I face palm & give up my dream of being a Goddess. "You have been deemed unworthy to the Gods & Goddesses! Therefore..we give thee the task of..Guardian Angel" "F**k.."