Explain to Aubrey that you and Jenna seemed to hit it off. Snooping on 7 was only to contact her. Honesty is the best policy.

Meeting at the CEO’s Office II

“Do you know why I called you up here?” asks Aubrey ambiguously. It’s something, the grim anticipation of being chewed out, possibly fired, by a secretary. Knowing that she was somebody’s assistant sure doesn’t ease your anxiety any.

“I think so.” Flirting with the boss’s girlfriend or whatever Jenna was? Looking into company secrets? It couldn’t be Amy. Could it?

“And do you have anything you’d like to state for the record?”

“Look, I wasn’t trying to upset anybody. If somebody had just told me where the line was, I wouldn’t have stepped over it.” Good. Covers all sins, doesn’t admit to anything, and–

Aubrey is frowning, however, and looks put off by your reply. “Stepped over… I’m sorry? Maybe we’re not talking about the same thing. What line?”

“The… line. You know. Of… what not to do.”

“I don’t know, actually.” Her frown intensifies. You get the feeling Aubrey Merriman is not a woman whose questions are often evaded. No wonder Mr. King has her manning the gate. “Please, enlighten me.”

Shoot. Well, you came up here to bite the bullet, no sense changing course now. Between flirting with Jenna and digging into potentially sensitive corporate secrets, the latter sounds a lot more forgivable, so you lead with that. “About Jenna?”

“What about Jenna?”

“About… our encounter. In the elevator?” So she doesn’t know. Only now, the way you’re stammering it out, it sounds far worse. “I must have missed my guess. It’s nothing nefarious, Ms. Merriman. We talked some in the elevator, seemed to hit it off, and I tried to look her up to follow up but couldn’t find her in the company directory.”

“Oh. So… you spoke to woman in the elevator, tried to email her, and couldn’t. What line does that cross exactly?”

“Oh. Well, I didn’t know if it might be considered, I dunno, unprofessional, or something.” Nice. Much better than saying She definitely blew Mr. King and I tried to chat her up even so, my bad! “Since we both work here, for the moment.”

“Oh! Is that all?” At last, a sparkle of mirth comes to Aubrey’s eyes. “My goodness. No, Mr. Saxon, Monarch Industries is actually very tolerant of office relationships. If someone catches your eye, by all means, chat them up. I’m assuming you’re up to date on sexual harassment policy and all, but that aside, corporate has no objection.”

Nor any to your interest in Jenna. Not bad at all. “Oh. Well, that’s good to know.”

“Who knows, one of our young ladies may just snare you for us, keep you around long-term, eh?”

Was that a job offer? Or is she about to try to set you up with one of the babes downstairs? What?

“Wouldn’t that be something,” you reply neutrally. “So if it wasn’t that, then…”

“I see. I was actually looking to address my concerns about your recent interactions with Ms. Diamond.”

“Ms. Diamond?” Who the fuck is Ms. Diamond?

“Yes. Brook?”

You shake your head. “Who?”

“Medium height, muscular, dark hair? Parking enforcement?”

This time, the headshake is faster and more to try to jostle your brain into working right. “You mean that b–” You catch yourself just in time. “That… Brooklyn?”

“Is it Brooklyn? I think she goes by Brook. Either way, yes, I see you know who I’m referring to.”

“I… yes. But, interaction? The only interaction we’ve had was my first day here, she was writing me a ticket and I tried to talk her down. She laughed in my face. Kind of mean about it. Is there some problem?”

“Well, I hope not. That’s why I asked you to meet with me.”

“Is there some kind of police matter going on?”

“Police…? Oh heavens no! Ms. Diamond works for Monarch Industries. She’s our parking enforcer – or rather, she’s part of our security team, but does have that particular obligation on her plate.”

“What? She wears a police uniform, though, doesn’t she?”

“Our security uniforms clearly delineate staff members connection to Monarch Industries, though studies have shown that uniforms which bear resemblance to those of perceived authority generate better results in the unfortunate event of a crisis situation. In any case, we’ve not gotten complaints.”

“Oh. So…”

“Right. There’s no simple way to say this, Mr. Saxon, so I’ll just come out with it. Ms. Diamond is… dedicated. Zealous, perhaps. Moreover, on occasion she will focus that zeal on a particular individual. Whether it’s for larks, some good-natured hazing, or something else, I won’t hazard a guess. And, well, I saw that you’ve received three parking citations now in the past six business days–”

“Four in the past eight,” you point out tersely, having counted them up only that morning when you made sure that this time, your car was touching the curb.

“Oh my, I must not be current. Well regardless… I wanted to see if there was any trouble, and perhaps we’ve already answered that.”

“You’re saying she makes a habit of this? Harassing new employees and whatnot?”

“I wouldn’t categorize it as ‘harassment’ per se.”

“So why does she still have a job? I know it’s not my place to conduct personnel reviews, but if she keeps going after people…”

“Ms. Diamond happens to be a person of some special interest to certain high-ranking members of the Monarch family,” she replies. “I’d rather not be more specific than that. So termination isn’t an option, and we’re in a position where we have to treat such occurrences with a light touch.”

“Good old nepotism,” you mutter, only belatedly wondering if there’s a Merriman on the board. Aubrey doesn’t flinch, though, so it seems you’re getting away with it.

“So while there’s only so much we can do to rein her in, as it were, we don’t wish for it to interfere with our relationships with valued contractors like yourself.”

Aubrey stops, hands folded calmly in her lap. After a pause, you realize she’s deferring to you.

Oho.

“I see. Well, for starters, you could comp me for the tickets I’ve already paid. Mailed those things off, didn’t even look at the address on the envelope.”

“Done and done. The same will go for any future citations.” Not even a caveat. Maybe take a VIP parking spot, see how it goes?

“I don’t suppose we can ask her to bug off until I’m gone.”

“Unfortunately, she can be somewhat oppositional defiant. So what can I do for you to make this situation as comfortable as it can be?”

Man. Here’s your chance. How far can you push this? Considering this is the executive assistant to the CEO, they must be awfully concerned or they’d have delegated the talk to some nobody from HR. Aubrey’s been pretty chill, too, encouraging your interest in Jenna, even semi-playfully suggesting she hopes one of their ladies hooks you. Or maybe this is your chance to show what a dude you can be?

Decision time! Voting takes place for patrons $10+ at https://www.patreon.com/icebear. Results will continue to be posted here for free, though, so no pressure.

Your choices:

• Ask for money. That woman has been a real thorn in your paw.
• Ask for Jenna’s contact information.
• Ask for a workspace near Amy’s office. Maybe that’s the better pursuit.
• She mentioned hopes a Monarch lady would hook you. Call her on it, ask her if she knows any she could set you up with.
• Find a non-espionagey way of asking for a tour of 7. Satisfy that itch of curiosity.
• Impress her. Ask for nothing. Maybe you can cash it in later.