Error in logic

While the bath water was on the colder side it was still a tad warmer than the average modern tub. The freestanding Victorian bath stood fittingly with the old fashioned furniture and fixtures of the bathroom.

Though the home had been updated over the years to accommodate modern conveniences, much of the charm embedded in the 100 plus year old house was maintained with a quaint and robust aesthetic.

This style was first truly appreciated by Arnold when he closed the aged bathroom door and found the fancy nob was both jiggly in his hand as well as nonfunctioning. It was obvious the nob was as old as the door and simply there for the look of it all. Arnold was pleased to see a similarly vintaged old key sticking out of the keyhole just below the wobbly nob. When Arnold realized the nob wasn't going to keep the door closed he simply pushed the door snugly shut and turned the old key. As he stepped away the door stayed where it was and Arnold assumed the key was how they kept the door from swinging open.

Arnold, unfortunately, was wrong. The key was also just there for aesthetics. Had Arnold simply looked up instead of down he would have seen a steady metal latch that just slides to the right, locking the door. Sadly for Arnold, the latch remained to the left as he stripped himself of all concern and submerged his vulnerability into the temporarily warm freestanding bateau tub.

A short while later, while Arnold lay passed out in the cooling water, Melanie, a cute brunette and one of the younger friends in Jenny's group was walking down the hall when she saw a torn pillow near the open guest room door. She knew almost immediately that the dog had gotten up to the second floor. Jenny had just ten minutes ago gone to put the dog outside in the doghouse for the night, and apparently it wasn't a moment to soon.

Melanie picked up both the pillow and the loose stuffing, shoving the cotton back inside the fabric as she stepped through the open doorway of the nearby guestroom to put it away.

Once she was in the guest room she again had to stop in her tracks in surprise, and again it was because the dog had left a sign visit. Luckily, nothing was destroyed.

However, Arnold's bag was toppled on the floor and several papers had spilled out awkwardly.

Melanie sighed and tossed the pillow across the room onto the bay window bench, before bending over and attempting to smartly slide the papers back into the bag from whence there cascade had begun. Once the papers were inside, however, Melanie could see other items revealed on the floor beneath, items having toppled out from a lower pocket of the bag.

These items were not as mature looking as the receipts and few school and calendar pages she has just briefly touched. These items were less vague. She picked them up one after the other, confused by the combination of items as she returned them swiftly to their pocket in the bottom of the bag. With each item her brain built an equation that only a silly teenager could.

A toothbrush.

A pink toy gun.

A pink toy whistle.

A pink toy badge.

Jenny thought it was wierd but jammed the items deep into the bottom of the pocket. She then slowed her simple process of picking things up and putting them down, so she could better observe what exactly she was cleaning up. She's seen a little boy with a toy gun before but...

A princess hairbrush? She kept moving, now gently placing things in the bag as she went through the items.

Two pony t-shirts.

A tea party set.

Two pairs of tighty whities and two pairs of princess underwear and two goodnight pullups.

A baby bottle.

A naked doll with a little backpack filled with even littler doll cloths.

A book about princesses.

A barbie tv show dvd.

An old notebook with cute childish scribbles and the words Dream Diary all over the cover.

While Melanie was curious what was in the notebook, she was too curious to slow down the process and miss what came next. So she slid the notebook into the bag and quickly picked up the second to last item, which was an old and somewhat tattered photograph that had been cut out of a magazine. The photo was of a celebrity teen heartthrob (from 4 years ago) and there was a large heart drawn in nail polish around the male image. As Melenie squinted somewhat confused at the picture while putting it away, she glimpsed the final item still remaining on the floor.

She picked up the handcuffs and eyed them close. Had she not seen so much wierd stuff just now she probably wouldn't have thought it that strange (considering the toy gun and badge) but with everything she just had in her hand, including panties and boy pictures, she couldn't help but jump to kinky conclusions.

"Oh I get it!", she thought to herself, before zipping the bag up with a smile.

Melenie propped the bag up next to the bed and stood proudly to her feet. Her "logical mathematical" conclusion now reached, she headed downstairs to her group of friends currently in the kitchen.

As she made her way down the old wooden stairs of the antique house, as happens with old warped wood and drafts, the air flow and pressure in the hallway changed with every step of her descent.

Melanie's prancing feet were just hitting the ground floor as the old fashioned bathroom door on the second level gently and quietly began sliding in its hinges, slowly swinging itself wide, inviting the hallway air into the now privateless space...where a shriveled and sleeping Arnold lays innocently with a dumb smile on his face.