ENF-048 - MATH FOR GIRLS

Item #: ENF-048
Object Class: Pink

Containment Procedures: ENF-048 is to be kept in the Research Facility 1-A library, in the Potential Infohazards section. It may be accessed by any member of Foundation staff, as long as the appropriate request form is submitted in triplicate to the Head Librarian and the staff member in question is fully apprised of the hazards.

Description: ENF-048 is a leather-bound book entitled Math For Girls. Bibliographic data suggests it was published sometime in the 1950s by a small academic press that went bankrupt halfway through its initial run. Only ten to fifteen copies were ever produced.

The introduction to Math For Girls is written in a deeply patronizing tone, implying throughout that girls are inherently "sillier" than boys, but promising that with the aid of "wise Professor Finkelstein", even the "silliest girl" can be made into "a real scientist". It also states, however, that any girl who wants to really learn math should be prepared to "pay the price", as she can never truly overcome her "silly nature". The rest of the book consists of increasingly inscrutable equations, with little or no explanation of what they mean. No further clue as to the identity of Professor Finkelstein has ever been discovered.

Any woman who reads Math For Girls from start to finish will develop genius-level mathematical and logical skills, more than enough to make staggering new discoveries in any scientific field of her choice. She will also, however, become highly absent-minded, specifically with regard to getting dressed. No matter how hard she tries to remember, or what techniques she uses to remind herself, she will routinely forget to put on some crucial article of clothing before she leaves the house. Typically, she will only realize this once it's far too late to correct the error.

The copy of Math For Girls currently in the Foundation's possession was discovered in the possession of Dr. Penelope Khan, formerly of St. Anne's College, Oxford, who came to the Foundation's attention when she accepted an award for Excellence in Theoretical Astrophysics with nothing on but a single black knee sock and a necktie. When this fact was brought to her attention, she naturally attempted to flee, but was for a period of several minutes unable to remember how to leave the stage. She now works for the Foundation's Trickery Department, where Dr. Blithe has proved highly impressed with her output.