Duh

"This sounds like my kind of town!" You exclaimed with a beaming, confident smile. Twenty children in just one month was certainly a tall order, but you were nothing if not ambitious. You knew you could meet that goal; you might even exceed it. "Sign me up, sir. It would be my privilege... to serve the nation of course," you added with a touch of humor.

That elicited a chuckle from Mr. Goodfellow. "And the nation thanks you for your sacrifice, young man." His eyes turned to the woman beside him. "I'll allow my lovely wife Lindsey to explain the various services that we'll be providing you to aid you."

Lindsey, whose name had at last been revealed, gleefully pitched in with the chipper voice of a cheerleader. "Gladly, honey! Like my hubby told you, there are only 30 days for you to do a lot of work. So we're going to acquaint you with four areas that will be pretty important for you during that time. The initiative calls them your four 'attributes.' They're seduction, endurance, fertility, and--" her eyes lit up as she got to the last of the list-- "the size of your equipment."

You gave her a quizzical look. "Well, I can understand those first three, but what does the last one actually have to do with impregnating?"

"Oh, a good question, Mr. Doe! Another thing the media haven't disclosed with the public is that it's not a mystery anymore why some men are immune. At least, we've spotted a factor that's highly correlated with immunity, even though we don't understand how it causes the reproductive system to fight the disease. I imagine you can guess where I'm going with this; the correlating factor is male genital size, Mr. Doe. Plus, some of the girls in Venusia are just size queens to be perfectly candid with you." She flashed a wink before her husband could notice.

You reclined in your chair, feeling rather smug about your situation. "Well, that's pretty good to hear. Not to toot my own horn too much, but I think I'm pretty set in each of those four areas," you said with the earned arrogance from past experience.

"Well, I wouldn't doubt it," Lindsey responded. "But don't get too cocky there, bigshot. Most, if not all, of the men we induct can say the same about themselves. That's why we want to go a step beyond your current state to really bring out the best of the best. The initiative has come up with some handy supplements to boost your natural attributes even higher!" Her tone could hardly contain her excitement as she explained these matters to you. It even appeared as though she was rubbing her legs together slightly.

"I'll quickly explain the attributes in depth and how they can assist you, along with how to increase them."