Dealing with the Fallout

After Caroline had collapsed on the couch, they had just stayed there in the relative quiet. Alan had been the first to break the silence asking if she was hungry. Caroline nodded and from there Alan had made them a simple pesto pasta from what Caroline had in her fridge. Both had sat and ate in relative silence, both reflecting on what had just happened and trying to reconcile it with their minds no longer addled by sex drives.

Alan for his part, was mostly stuck on logistics. What did this make them? As he watched her carefully, he knew that this could no longer be considered just a hookup, and it felt a bit too intense for friends-with-benefits. That would also require them to be friends and he wasn’t sure if they were there yet. So what was she to him? A pet?

He wondered what she must be thinking as he pieced together things from her perspective. She met a guy two days ago and after an uncharacteristic one night stand invited the guy over again two days later and proceeded to have rough sex while giving over the reins of her life to him. Yeah, no wonder she wasn’t talking, Alan mused, that would be a lot for anyone to take in and process.

After clearing the plates, Alan began to wash the ditches when the blonde spoke up for the first time,

“I um…I have an early morning so I think I need to sleep,” She was looking over at him, a pleading expression on her face and it took Alan a second to realize she was silently asking for permission.

“Yeah of course, I’ll put these dishes away and head out and get out of your hair.” Alan wiped his hands off on a dish towel.

“Ok…don’t forget the book, if you want I mean…” Her voice was so hesitant.

Alan came over and gave her a gentle hug, “It’s alright, you can speak freely, I won’t be mad” He sent her a wave of security and felt the woman relax in his embrace.

“Thank you…it’s just been very intense. I’m honestly not sure how I feel about everything…but I did enjoy today I think. Thank you for the food.” She wrapped her arms around Alan’s form and gave a gentle squeeze.

“You’re more than welcome, listen I’m kinda lost in this too so if you need anything just text me ok? Let’s keep in touch and figure this out together.”

“Ok…yeah that sounds good.” A tentative smile spread across her soft features.

Alan separated from her, “Alright, I'm gonna head out now. Keep in touch.” With that he moved to the door and gave a wave “Bye”

She raised a hand in response and waved “Bye!” Her expression was clearer now, less unsure which helped Alan feel a bit better as he left.

Streetlights were the only illumination left by the time Alan left the apartment. The rain had let up, now reduced to a dull drizzle, the large puddles left in the streets the only remnant of the heavy downpour from earlier. Still, the air had taken on a chill, and Alan pulled his coat close as he walked through on his way home, Neuromancer clutched in his pocket.

Alan also ran down a list of his rules in his head, after tonight's events he had to double check he was still behaving responsibly. He felt confident he had only given Caroline the push to do something she wanted to do. He had technically used the same suggestion multiple times, but only to make her feel safe! Surely that wasn’t a bad thing after what they had done. And sure he had used his powers definitely more than once, but that’s what it took to get her what she wanted!

He stroked his chin, Really what this proved was rules two and three were pointless. After all, if the goal was to help people, the restrictions only served to keep that from happening. So scrap that. For now he would only have one rule. That was plenty, especially in the service of helping others and if he happened to enjoy himself too? All the better!

So it was with a feeling of confidence and excitement that Alan returned home.