Day 31 - Free Space - She-Hulk

Jennifer was really struggling with finally cracking a single rep of a hundred thirty-five on the bench. She had been able to get a couple reps of a hundred fifteen, and a rep or two of one twenty-five. Then, with more than a little help, one rep of her goal here and there. But she couldn't quite find the way past the wall.

Of course, going green solved the wall but it didn’t actually help.

Janet - who was wearing matching workout gear in principle but less in practice - watched Jennifer struggle with the bar against her chest for long enough that Jennifer thought she was just going to be left to her. Finally, she reached down and eased the bar back up. This was all a lot easier for Janet, who was wearing her sports bra and compression shorts pretty openly. Meanwhile, Jenn had draped a cutoff sweatshirt and sweatpants around hers.

“Nothing but love hun,” Janet sighed after a second of Jenn stretching and trying to work life back into her shoulders. “But this is… a little pathetic?”

“You’re telling me,” Jenn grumbled. “Bruce’s kid isn’t even in school yet and his aunty already lost the ability to carry him. I’m losing my uppies window in real time.”

“And Green gives too good of uppies?” Janet half-asked.

“We…” Jennifer scratched the back of her head. “They’re doing their best to raise him in a no-Green household. At least until we can’t avoid it.”

“Oh, so the kid isn’t…?”

“Well he didn’t come out green and he hasn’t knocked a building down after getting put in time-out yet.” Jenn shrugged. “Either he is or he isn’t. Either they have to have a second ‘the talk’ at some point, or they eventually have to explain why daddy goes away whenever he’s getting angry. They don’t want to cross the bridge until they have to.”

“Not sure I get the point of it,” Janet shrugged back. “But that’s Bruce’s deal.”

“I think it’s a control thing, because it usually is for Bruce.” Jennifer laid back down on the bench, but Janet gave a signal like she should stop. “Buce doesn’t have a say in the green and he doesn’t control it, so I think sometimes he gets… ashamed of it.”

“As opposed to you,” Janet patted her on the back and moved her off the bench.

“Green doesn’t struggle to bench what you were benching in high school.”

“Neither of us were benching in high school, hun,” Janet laid back and gripped the bar, then did four pretty easy up and down reps. She held the bar up for a second like she was considering whether or not to put it back, then decided on doing four more easy ones. She probably wasn’t trying to show off, but Jenn definitely felt shown up. “I’d say it takes practice, but you’ve been trying for… a while now.”

“I’m telling you, Green gets all the protein I eat, I get all the carbs.” Jenn sighed and gestured like she was going to help guide the bar. Janet had no problem with it. “Though even that’s not true. I haven’t gained more than a pound or two in the last… well, in a while.”

“Does Green… need protein?” Janet asked as she was slotting more weight on the bar. “Can she get stronger?”

“I’m not a hundred percent sure,” Jenn slapped Janet’s shoulders as she went to lay down. Janet squirmed a bit under the bar before picking it up. “Some of the Hulk questions people have, I have practical answers for, some of them I don’t.”

“I always assumed… Green was just… ‘infinitely’ strong…” Janet breathed between reps.

“Kinda yes, kinda no?” Jenn again gestured like she was at all going to help spot. “I think Green is as strong as the situation demands. If Bruce wants to punch a mountain down, he can do it. And I think the only reason he can’t lift one is because there’d be nowhere to grip it. But I’ve run into limits before. I think it’s as close to infinite as you can get without actually being infinite.”

“Sort of a Koch’s snowflake thing,” Janet finished her reps and sighed. Then got up and took the weight off of the bar until it was an amount Jenn could do for reps.

“I’m unfamiliar,” Jenn admitted as she sat down.

“It’s a paradox. You take an equilateral triangle and contain it within a circle, say there’s only a millimeter separating the points from the circle,” Janet explained casually while guiding the bar lightly with her fingers. Jenn strained and grunted. “Then you add half-sized triangles to each of the triangle’s sides, then quarter-sized triangles to each of those triangle’s sides. On and on and on. Eventually the length of the shape becomes, theoretically, infinite. But it never actually touches the circle despite this.”

“Guess so?” Jenn finished her last rep just barely, then breathed a long ragged sigh. “Never heard of it.”

“It’s a math thing,” Janet shrugged. “I apologize for needlessly flexing my degree.”

“Flex all you want,” Jenn groaned and rubbed her aching shoulders. “I was too busy studying law instead of cock.”

“Co-ke, like the drink,” Janet snapped her with a sweatband. “**** wordplay in the Avengers’ gym is strictly frowned upon.”

“We’re the only ones here.” Jenn shrugged.

“I frown upon it.” Janet snapped her again, “And so long as you’re this color and size, I’m the scary one.”

“Do you want me to go Green?” Jenn gave her an uncertain look. “I didn’t think this was about showing off.”

“Tony did request that I test her limits at some point,” Janet handed her a bottle of water. “But like most of what Tony asks, we can just kinda backburner it.”

“I’ll want to get out of the sports bra and shorts,” Jenn responded. “One-size-fits-all stops where Gamma radiation starts.”

“Do what you gotta do, I’m in no rush.” Janet waved her off. “I’ve also got plenty of other exercises for Jenn.”

“God, please no,” Jennifer stood up and slipped an arm into her cutoff sweatshirt. “I already feel like I’ve been assaulted.”

“That usually means it’s working,” Janet stuck her tongue out. “Actually, on that note, when you get into a fight while Green, do you feel it the next day?”

“Is this a personal question or is this a Tony thing?” Jenn slipped her sports bra off of one shoulder, then the other.

“Kinda both. I can just not tell him anything you don’t want me to.” Janet gave a non-committal gesture. “Only by the grace of god is this place and the locker room not recorded.”

“Bruises no, cuts and scrapes sometimes.” Jenn slid her sports bra down around her hips and then stepped out of it. “Anything serious, my body doesn’t let me change back until I’ve regenerated it.”

“Bruce has expressed a - roughly - similar concept,” Janet pretended to avert her eyes. “He talked about putting a gun in his mouth, then waking up with Hulk spitting out the bullet.”

“I’ve never done anything that drastic,” Jenn mumbled as she tried to find the best way to shimmy out of her compression shorts.

“Actually, there’s one I’ve always wondered about, if you’ll indulge me,” Janet’s voice shifted toward the mischievous.

“Shoot away,” Jenn tried a few different ways of getting one leg out first before giving up and just dropping both sets of bottoms. Janet was a friend.

“If you or Bruce were to eat like… twenty pizzas and then change back… would it be… problematic?” Janet asked sheepishly.

“This is probably going to be a boring answer,” Jenn slipped her cut-off sweatpants back on. “But my stomach doesn’t grow that much while Green. I can put away a sixteen-inch pizza, but even if you asked me to put away two, I don’t think I’d be able to.”

“Ah,” Janet did sound just a bit disappointed. “And Bruce?”

“Not sure if Bruce is any different.” Jenn scratched her head. “But pretending he is and Hulk can eat twenty pizzas, if transforming back would pose an actual threat to his life, he wouldn’t be able to. Or, worst case scenario, he’d transform back and then Hulk out again as soon as going to the bathroom posed a risk.”

“I’ll admit, I let myself be taken in by the concept of the Hulk-sized poop,” Janet sighed.

“I understand the whole transformation is fantastical and all, but think about it logically for a second,” Jenn started to change even as she talked. “Would his growing larger result in his stomach acid growing, or there being more of it? It isn’t like the water molecules in his body are growing larger, and he can’t just make more of them out of thin air. It’s a kind of… redistribution.”

“The attempt to apply science is appreciated, but you’re out of your depth, hon.” Janet was still pretending to avert her eyes, emphasis on pretending. “At a certain point, magic is happening. There isn’t enough mass in his body to redistribute into fourteen hundred pounds. I choose to believe that the Hulk-sized poop is possible.”

“Take that up with Bruce, then,” Jenn flexed her arms as she finished transforming. The soreness of her workout had faded, and her cutoff sweatshirt and sweatpants now roughly resembled a sports bra and compression shorts. “As for She-Hulk, I get up to seven hundred pounds, but I still tap out before I’m done with the second pizza.”

“And is that a consistent seven hundred?” Janet stopped pretending to look away.

“Give or take ten pounds in either direction,” She-Hulk stretched a bit. “Neither Green nor Jenn move a lot in either direction, no matter what I do.”

“That doesn’t sound like a bad problem to have,” Janet started moving heavy weights onto the bar. “Sounds like you can eat whatever you want.”

“I still have to answer to my stomach and body about it,” Jennifer laid back. “Greasy skin, stomachaches, etc. Honestly, I’d give some of it up for a bit more control. Green wears it well, but Jenn is stuck with this skinnyfat-”

“Slimthick,” Janet corrected.

“This slimthick look that doesn’t get the benefit of either slim or thick,” She-Hulk eyed the bar. Janet had put something like two hundred pounds on either side of it. Wrapping one hand around the center of it, she lifted it easily, sat up, and began to pump it like a dumbbell.

“Jenn seems like she does fine for herself,” Janet didn’t seem especially impressed by She-Hulk’s feat of strength. “Wyatt, Ben, Tony, Logan…”

“Give some credit to my charming personality,” Jennifer realized she was bending the bar by using it like that, and tried to straighten it as she set it back into place. “But it’s the old problem with this line of work. Some guys want you to hang up the costume, some guys are a little too into the costume.”

“Don’t tell me which of those are which,” Janet picked up another heavy plate to add to the bar. “I’d like to keep at least some of my romantic fantasies intact.”

“I’m also getting tired of dating my co-workers,” She-Hulk sat back when another hundred pounds had been added to either side. She made a show of slowly and properly doing the bench press with perfect form. It felt like she was lifting tissue paper. “At least, Avengers coworkers.”

“And give up kinky workplace hookups?” Janet leaned her bodyweight against the bar, Jenn kept moving it with no greater show of exertion.

“There’s a difference between something fun and something I actually want,” She-Hulk set the bar back in place. “I wouldn’t want to be drunk twenty-four-seven.”

“So what’s the fantasy then? Finding some paralegal to collar and come home to? Become a housewife?” Janet’s face screwed up as she realized she was essentially out of room on the bar for more weight. “Actually, can Green get pregnant?”

“Bruce had a kid no problem, so I don’t think the gamma made us infertile,” She-Hulk bent down and picked up the whole bench and frame. “But Jenn is on birth control for the foreseeable future. And I think the plan would be to just… try to avoid transforming while pregnant.”

“You don’t want a cute little Hulk baby?” Janet asked facetiously.

“More worried about what would happen to the fetus,” Jenn sighed and set the bench down. “Could be fine, could cause problems. Can’t know without finding out the hard way.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure if I shrunk down, any unborn kid would be fine.” Janet grimaced. “But you never want to run the risk if you can avoid it.”

“I’ve never spat out a bullet, but I’ve transformed while holding a drink before and crushed the cup by accident.” She-Hulk picked up one of the squat racks and looked at Janet with a smirk. Janet waved disinterestedly. “You wouldn’t think that was some delicate operation, but I guess it is.”

“Never transformed during sex as a funny prank, then?” Janet gestured to the showers. Jenn started to change back to herself.

“God no.” Jenn felt her soreness coming back. “Even assuming I didn’t break anything delicate, it just seems like an impolite thing to do.”

“Actually, that makes me wonder,” Janet toweled her forehead and gave Jenn a cheeky look. “You said getting roughed up while Green didn’t carry over to Jenn?”

“I think I know what you’re asking,” Jenn was roughly eye-level with her and tried to meet the look. “Anything… released… stays there. But I don’t get sore or anything.”

“Wait, so you can go all night and still walk fine the day after?” Janet reached out to slap with her towel, but Jenn ducked away. “That’s a great power.”

“I mean, I still get tired.” Jenn responded sheepishly. “And it’s the pizza question again. It’s not like I suddenly have some bottomless appetite.”

“Right, but if you’re with somebody who’s big…” Janet asked leadingly.

“You mean like B-” Jenn stopped herself. It wasn’t nice to tell on your coworkers. “I mean, yeah. But I’m not exactly size-checking anybody who shows interest. Just because Green can doesn’t make it hot to Jenn.”

“I mean, a partner is one thing,” Janet gestured again to the showers. “But you’ve never tried playing with a big toy or anything?”

“Never really spent money on that,” Jenn muttered. “Got a decent vibrator and never saw the need for more.”

“Not to completely expose myself here,” Janet set her hand on the back of Jenn’s neck and leaned in conspiratorially. “If it weren’t for the price that came with playing, size queening would be the best game in town. You’re set up.”

“I've just never felt the urge,” Jenn admitted. Despite the fact that - she was pretty sure - she had a more active sex life than Wasp, Janet absolutely had her beat in terms of actual knowledge and technique.

“Let me guess, you found a way that worked as a teenager and you haven’t really deviated since?” Janet teased.

“Electric toothbrush,” Jenn sighed.

“I can’t argue with the classics, but let me tell you,” Janet was going to tell her whether she had permission or not. “A little boldness and experimentation will change your world.”

“Sure, but I don’t think I’m about to spend money on some huge toy just for that.” Jennifer pushed back.

“Well, you can’t borrow any of mine,” Janet rolled her eyes. “Not that I don’t love you, hun, but sanitary reasons.”

“I wouldn’t take one from you,” Jenn raised her hands.

“You don’t need to spend money on anything,” Janet continued. “I don’t know, just use a TV remote or even just more of your fingers than usual next time and see how you feel. You can find them for cheaper than you’d think if you decide your world has been sufficiently changed.”

“I’ll take your word for it,” Jennifer finally slipped Janet’s hand off of her neck. “Did watching Green workout get you in a mood?”

“I’m always in a mood, what our workout got me was sweaty.” Janet pushed her toward the shower finally.

***

Jennifer slumped down onto the couch of her apartment - technically Janet’s, on a loan - and pulled out her phone. The first few seconds on it were automatic, like they were for most people. A sort of programmed check of email, then social media, then one or two personal apps. Then the brain unlocked and let you actually browse for fun. At least, that was how it was supposed to be. Jenn’s brain was a slurry of noise.

There was, no matter what job you worked, a specific job or task in that place which had the capability of reducing you to a zombie. If you worked in a grocery store, it was stocking shelves. If you worked in an office, it was data entry. In any law office, it was being the one lawyer or paralegal who had check case citations. There might not have been many forms of **** in the world that compared to spending an entire day not only reading legalese, but verifying if the cited cases - for both your side and the opponent - were both legitimate and argued the thing that the filing asserted. It was a mixture of fact-checking and interpretation which mostly felt like homework. The comb was too fine-toothed for it to be a creative exercise, but it was too active and subjective to be purely a recitation of black-letter law. At this point, if somebody tried to argue with her that the government had ruled in favor of giving dogs the vote, she might not have had the brain power to catch it. Ideally, you didn’t lock anybody in the citation minds for too long. That was how mistakes happened. But at a small firm? People went missing into the back offices and weren’t heard from again until somebody eventually went looking for their coffee cups.

She opened social media and scrolled for a bit, closed it, then opened it again and scrolled for a bit more. There was part of her that missed cable, just not that strongly. Cable at least gave you the option of turning it on, falling onto the couch, and letting the stuff come to you. Of course, most of that stuff was advertising and dreck, but at least it was the one making the effort. For as much as mankind rose above the animal kingdom, every now and then piggy wanted her trough filled with the good slop.

Jen **** herself up and into the kitchen. She didn’t have any kind of willpower to cook something, so she grabbed some cheese and crackers, then fell back toward the couch. Flopping her hand over onto her laptop and turning it on. After a few minutes fumbling aimlessly, she had it set up to play something she more or less could tolerate on Youtube, then she sat back and popped open her crackers.

For a while, that was what she accomplished. The cheese mostly made it onto the crackers, the crackers mostly made it into her mouth, and whenever autoplay pulled up something she didn’t want to watch, she used non-crumby fingers to slap the trackpad until the offending content went away. Some people used the gym to unwind, some people drank. This was probably less glorious than either, but nobody got hurt.

Finishing up her meal, immediately there wasn’t much else she was thinking about more than how tired she was. Not in a way that suggested she would actually get to sleep, she had too much coffee still in her for that, but in a way where continuing to veg out sounded like the ideal for the rest of the night. She got up to wash her hands - and to put the rest of the cheese away - and decided that lying in bed watching her laptop was probably better than lying on the couch watching it. As she opened the fridge, Jenn paused.

Janet hadn’t gone grocery shopping recently - though she only did so once in a while anyway. Jenn had also not been out shopping in a while. The fridge was a little bare, and the freezer wasn’t much better. But, among the half-empty cans and bottles she had a bad habit of saving only to throw away months later, was the sad remains of a salad kit that she had intended to use at some point. The lettuce looked a little wilted. Not rotting, but past the point of desirability. The carrots had started to get little black spots and little white hairs - much like a person did as they got older. The cherry tomatoes were the worst off. The cucumber… Well, the cucumber actually still looked fine. Those were pretty hardy.

She hesitated looking at the cucumber for a minute. If she was being entirely realistic, the best thing to do would be to throw it all out. She probably was even less likely to make that salad now than she had been when she’d bought it all. And it was only going to get worse with each passing day. If she just wanted to get rid of the bits that were losing their luster, she could cut the offending bits off of the carrots and be fine. The lettuce was probably gone, the tomatoes definitely were. Did she really want a single, lone cucumber? Would there be any situation that called for a single, lone cucumber?

Realistically, there was one. Her brain immediately went to the dirtiest - if not exactly most practical place. She was familiar with the concept, more familiar with the meme even. She’d never gone for it and never really considered it. Part of that really was just that she’d found the one technique that worked and stuck with it. Another part of her had also just assumed you got some weird disease if you didn’t put a condom or some wrap around it first, and who wanted to waste a condom on masturbating? Though this one was saran-wrapped, so that was a pointless thing to worry about anyway.

Honestly, if she was going to do it, this was probably one of the better gourds she’d encountered for it. If you were treating it like somebody’s dick, the owner of this cucumber would have been above average but not problematic. Enough of a presence that it would have been much more than she was used to masturbating with, but not so much more that she had any real fear of it. Though, if what Janet had talked about was true, she might not have needed to be fearful of a pineapple. She still wasn’t even humoring a pineapple. After a moment’s consideration, she realized she couldn’t pretend that she wasn’t humoring this.

Taking the cucumber from the fridge with an almost performative level of casualness - as if anybody was watching, Jenn grabbed her laptop from off of her coffee table and made her way to the bedroom. She slipped out of her work clothes down to her underwear, considered a shower or some sleepwear, then just slipped out of her underwear as well. Plopping down in bed and setting her laptop down on a tray, she slid open her bedside drawer and pulled out the little lipstick vibrator that she’d never been bold enough to actually keep in a purse or a pocket. Life was ultimately a series of reminders that you weren’t as daring as you told yourself you were. It didn’t matter what your job or gamma count was.

She considered pulling up something sexy on her laptop for a second, then had a both inevitable and annoying thought win out in her head. The ‘is everybody fucking with me’ thought that everybody has both before trying and before first using sex toys. Jenn searched up videos of women actually using cucumbers in that way - not just joking about it. After a few seconds watching, she sighed. Surely all of these women couldn’t have then immediately contracted strange cucumber diseases. It would have been in the news if it was that common.

The little vibrator buzzed more like a phone than anything else. It wasn’t especially strong or ergonomic, but she wasn’t especially demanding. Jenn kicked herself for not getting lube, but she also - so far as she could tell - hadn’t actually intended to do this. It was easier to conceptualize it more as a spur-the-moment thing. Like buying yourself a little treat or flashing the guy you were saving. Something you did for yourself. She brought the little lipstick against her clit and shifted it into her palm, then started rubbing the lips of her pussy with her fingers. Taking in a soft, excited breath, she tried to walk the line of doing both at once, though mostly she did one or the other. Then she slowly worked in a finger, hardly something to write home about.

Oh, she had almost forgotten the important part of this process.

Jenn quickly transformed - something her bed springs didn’t appreciate - and went back to what she had been doing. It wasn’t… not her pussy? But it wasn’t the same pussy, per se. The cunt of Theseus, perhaps. The bits were all in roughly the same place, they felt the same to the touch, they were about as sensitive in either shape. Really, aside from the green-ness, there wasn’t really anything that made it She-Hulk’s pussy and not Jennifer Walters’ pussy. If one were to get into vagina ownership. Vulva squatter’s rights. Clitoris claimancy.

She went back to her fingers. Two this time. Then, the big one, the third. The jump from one to two was very little. The jump from two to three was the whole world. It took a second for her to ease into it, but when she did, it was easier than it perhaps had seemed. The problem with working in a fourth finger was that pinkies were shitty fingers. At basically everything other than hitting the A key on a keyboard or sticking out like a complete tool while you drank tea. She pulled her fingers out and grabbed the cucumber instead, lining it up against her pussy and-

Cold. Cold cold cold. One didn’t normally refrigerate one’s sex toys for a reason. Jenn spat on it and stroked it quickly, trying to work warmth into it more than anything else. Then paused for a moment and slipped it into her mouth, trying to exhale warm air onto it without biting down. She kept the vibrator where it was between her legs, after a moment she went back to rubbing the cucumber against her pussy. It was still colder than she would have liked, but not such a shock.

Her first reaction was a sort of grimace. Between the slight stretch and the still-not-warmness of it, the sensation wasn’t exactly rocking her world. Jenn started to pump it very slowly in and out, taking her vibrator away and switching her laptop from demonstrative videos to something actually erotic. This still wasn’t exactly her idea of a good night at home alone, but it perhaps wasn’t so bad as first impressions went. As the cucumber warmed, and as her body got a little more used to it, her cunt started to become more audibly wet over the weak vibration from her other hand. She started to rock into the thrusts more, push a bit deeper inside of herself. The stretch wasn’t bad. It wasn’t something she had sought out before, but it could be a friend. More than the stretch, the feeling of fullness which she wasn’t used to. Her clit was throbbing like crazy.

Sometimes, jerking off was more exciting than other times. You weren’t always peak randy so much as you were bored, or frustrated, or just horny enough to keep you from getting easily to sleep. Jenn hadn’t felt this way going in, but doing things differently, specifically this mode of doing things differently, was making her more excited than she’d expected.

It came almost without warning, though she’d been pistoning the cucumber quickly enough that she had expected it. Her crotch pumped up into her hand and her eyes rolled back. Jenn felt her teeth clench. Her cunt was trying to throb and squeeze, but it was being blocked by something big, green, and for once not her own despite the previous two adjectives. As her hand slipped from the cucumber and clenched into a fist against her thigh, Jenn’s back arched, she jerked a bit in place, and the cucumber came shooting out onto the sheets. That feeling, the sudden emptiness, made her part her lips and cry out, just as it made a wet spray come jetting from between her legs. Her toes curled into the sheets. If she looked in the mirror, she might have been crosseyed.

After a few seconds, it petered out, leaving little shakes through her body. Jenn recovered slowly and turned off the vibrator, though she intended to have it back on again in a bit. Her cunt was aching, partly from the stretch and partly from her orgasm. But when she changed back to herself, the throb of the ache passed, while the aftershocks remained.

Picking up the cucumber, it looked a little worse for wear. The saran wrap was slick, coming apart and exposing cold gourd-y skin. And it seemed… spongy and bruised.

With a sigh, Jenn turned the vibrator back on and set the cucumber on the nightstand. Then reached over with her free hand and made a series of slightly shameful purchases.

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