Complete the outfit with the lace apron

This is a little piece of lace silliness. This isn't an apron in any practical sense, and more than the French Maid of erotic fantasy actually performs useful housework. There's a label on the inside that says: "Excalibur Costumes" and "One Size Fits All."

After tying the silk ribbons around your slender waist, doing your best to make a bowtie in back, you look down at your handiwork.

This is the kind of stuff you love seeing on a girl. You've had French Maid fantasies just like any other guy, so the sight of a girl wearing a frilly apron normally gets you rock hard.

Not having a cock takes a bit of the fun out of that.