Big Dick

"It has to be a big dick," Buffy said while picturing it in her head.

"Yeah, B, I knew you were a size queen!" Faith congratulated her.

"It makes sense," Cordelia agreed. "I date a total loser, but he has something that makes up for it."

Ms. Calendar stepped forward with a shake of her head as she grabbed the list, "Ladies, one day you'll realize that while a good cock is nice, if the guy can't give you different experiences, you'll tire of it quickly."

"I don't know Ms. Calendar, Xander's cock is far better than good," Cordelia told her.

Ms. Calendar chuckled, "Well, I have work to do."

"I'll come with you," Willow volunteered as she chased after the computer teacher.

Faith watched her go, "What's up with Red?"

"It's a long story," Buffy said as she took a moment to fantasize about Xander. "So, do you think James had a dick as big as Xander's?"

"Please?" Cordelia said derisively. "If he had a cock half the size of Xander's he'd dwarf most other men."

“And still be more than double Angel’s size,” Buffy whispered under her breath, but still got a knowing look from faith.

-

*During the episode, the group performs the exorcism, but it fails. Buffy is later summoned back by the spirit, as is Angel. Because a bullet doesn't kill Angel, he and Buffy, possessed by Grace and James, kiss.

"Angel..." Buffy murmured as she looked up at him, still in his embrace. Suddenly her memories came flooding back and she threw him back. "God, I...I kissed you. Blech. I think I'm going to vomit."

Angelus growled, "Don't play games with me, Slayer."

Buffy wasn't sure if she was playing games or not and began to rub at her tongue. "This is disgusting. And when you were pressed against me, were you even hard? I couldn't feel anything."

"I'll make you feel something," Angelus threatened.

"That would be a first," Buffy said as he advanced on her. "Could you hold off on the fight? I'd really like to get my lips on Xander's cock to get this awful taste out of my mouth."

Angelus looked at her, a mix of feelings rushing through him, and then turned away and ran.

-

Buffy sighed as she finished explaining the story to Buffy, Giles, and Jenny. She left off some of the details of what went down between her and Angel.

"You think the spirits are at rest?" Giles asked.

She shook her head uncertainly, "I don't know. I felt like there was still something unresolved."

"Like what?" Willow asked, confused.

"Something on Grace's side, I think."

-

Xander walked through the school confused. He wasn't sure why he was here. Just that a presence had reached out to him and called him to the school after Buffy had finished with Angel.

He went into the classroom that Grace Newman had one taught in. The lights were already on.

"Hello Xander. Hello James," three female voices said as one.

The door slammed behind Xander as he took in the figures of Cordelia, Drusilla, and Faith.