Beat it.

"Well if it ain't my ol friend, my compadre, my roommate! How's it going, Buddy?" Uday waltzes into the room in his trademark theatrical style. It must be an interesting scene: you, languishing idly at your desk, he, cavorting about the room as he often does. How's he so happy all the time?

Uday puts down a bag of groceries and pulls up a chair next to you. He puts one snake-like arm around your shoulders. "Tell me, Buddy, what seems to be the trouble?" The whole thing was so stupid and so embarassing. Do you even want to talk about it?

"Don't want to tell me about it, huh? That's okay. Here, let me tell -you- something. Today, I was gettin my mac on with this girl, Sheila. She lives down the hall. You know her? You'd like her. Except that -I- like her. Anyway, things were going great when Sheila's friend, Brandy, comes in, and there's some talking and it comes up that -you're- my roommate. And instantly the conversation shifts to you, and they're all askin me shit about you and I don't know what the fuck they're talking about, and they thought I was covering for you or some shit, and now Sheila doesn't feel like talking to me anymore. So let me ask you again: -how's it going, Buddy?-"

Uday's grip is a lot like your dad's. You tell him the sordid details.

"Oh, shit!" Uday is quite profane today. Has he been drinking? "This blows!" Well, at least you have one sympathetic ear. "I mean, how am I supposed to get my mac on on this floor? I'm gonna have to change my name! I can't tell people you're my roommate! I need a new room! I need a new roooooooooom!!" More of the melodrama. Uday has a knack for making things sound worse than they are. Besides, this is bad for you, and not so bad at all for him. Selfish!

"Actually, it is that bad," he retorts. "I didn't realize it before, but now that you've told me what happened, everyone's been talking about your incident with your professor."

So it seems that you've become the pariah of MacLaren Hall. "What am I supposed to do?" you ask. "Go back and apologize to that evil Femi-Nazi?"

"I don't think you can do anything. You're just gonna have to make friends somewhere else, cuz you ain't gonna find em here." Uday gets up and heads toward the door. Where's he going?

"I'm gonna go to the housing office and see if I can get my room changed."
"You're not serious..."
"Just kidding, Buddy. Don't let it getcha down. I'm meeting Ken and the dudes for a flick. Later."

Sure, Uday was kidding about getting his room changed, but was he serious about the word spreading so quickly about the feminist fiasco? That was only yesterday! All it takes is one day, and you're an outcast.

But now you've got something else to worry about: