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Mia and I went back to Youngstown after midterms for Christmas break, she's staying with her parents and I'm at my mom's house. Earlier in the day I visited Tina's grave and placed a wreath. It's the first Christmas since her and her father's ****. I can't help but cry as I remember my friend.

She stood by me during some very hard times in my life and I still can't believe she's gone. As I sit on the cold ground with tears in my eyes her mom comes up behind me. I stand up and give her a hug. I'm so choked up I can't even speak. All I can do is hold her tightly as she strokes my hair." Oh Ari, it's so good to see you."

She places some flowers by the tombstone with tears in her eyes. Looking at the wreath I laid she kneels." Such a lovely wreath. I'm sure Tina would appreciate it, thank you Ari." We talk for a bit then walk back to our cars hand in hand. As she drives away I sit in my car and weep. I don't know how long I sat there until I was able to drive home. It's so unfair. Tina was supposed to be with us in Columbus. It was supposed to be Tina , Mia and myself.

When I get home I call Tina's mom and we talk for a few hours. I tell her of the times I considered suicide and how Tina helped me through it and how much I loved Tina.

Later that evening Mia comes over and we spend the night in my old bedroom. As usual she holds me in her strong arms as I cry myself to sleep over Tina's ****. I am so fortunate to have Mia in my life. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I love her so much.

We spend Christmas day visiting our parents and giving out gifts. That night we go to Tina's mother's house and I give her a photo album I put together of Tina and I from when we were little up to the time we were in high school. I feel so sad that she is alone now. We spend the evening talking about old times. Mia and I leave around midnight. This has been such a sad Christmas without Tina my friend since childhood.

We stay another week in Youngstown spending time with our families and Tina's mother before heading back to Columbus.