BASEMENT BOB

After handling my own issue I threw back the thick rug and walked down the stairs to my lair. Bob's skull shook and shown with an orange light as I passed. "Harry, you seem tense. How bout a massage. Let me out and I'll help."

"Forget it, Bob. There are entire blocks still reeling from your one night of debauchery." Bob being a spirit of air and intellect has no body to call his own so he lives inside the skull. Lives like a prisoner lives inside a prison. I let him out every now and again but he's a perpetually horny being of intellect and enjoys possessing co-eds.

The orange light seems to shift inside his skull, I think he just rolled his eyes at me. "Fine. What are we going to do today brain?"

"Someone has transmuted a living being."

"Narf." The lights in his skull dimmed to pinpoints.

"Fine, if you don't want to hear about a woman being turned into a lust filled beauty you can read one of your trashy romance novels."

There was a long pause as the lights grew brighter, "Hmm, sounds dangerous and I wouldn't want to leave you high and dry."

"Your concern for me is touching."

If a skull with no muscle or facial tissue could fain being shocked and offended Bob did a perfect rendition, "I always have your best interest at heart." I rolled my eyes as I looked through my books for something to counteract her lust spell at least and possibly a glamor to hide her package while I recounted Linda's case for Bob. "Lust spells usually come with an agenda, like sexual slavery." Bob sighed wistfully, "Ah Bernadette Badeaux. She had the most amazingly large, gravity-defying breasts and her milk tasted like-"

"Bob!"

"Right, you Americans are so hung up these days. As I was saying, the transmutation in this way reminds me of a group of friends I used to spend summers with, in my corporeal days. They specialized in these gender bender spells like you described."

"How come I never heard of this before?"

"It's not something people talk about these days unless you're already into these sort of magics. Look under Madame Laganja."

"In what book?"

"The yellow pages."

I found an address but according to their pre-recorded message they wouldn't be open for several hours. So I had time to kill and whipped up a few potions, a pocket full of sunshine, burns brighter than a flashbang and kills vampires at twenty paces. A tornado in a bottle for a quick exit, a charmed pair of glasses makes a nice Clark Kent disguise. All while brewing up a general counter potion for a lust spell in a big brass pot surrounded by the copper pentagram in my floor.

Arriving back at my office I noticed a pregnant woman standing at my door having aa terrible time of trying to bend over and slip something into my mail slot. "Can I help you?" I kept a finger on my wand just in case.

She grunted as she turned around, if she was in disguise she was a damn fine actress, "Coulda helped if you were here a minute ago." She straightened out her hair and nervously held her pregnant belly, by the looks of her she was eight months pregnant. "You're Harry Dresden right?"

"Maybe."

"Are you or aren't you?" Her purse slipped off of her shoulder, "Fuck me."

"Allow me," As I handed her the purse I made sure to slide my iron ring across her, no reaction, so she wasn't a fae.

"Thank you."

"I am, just can't be too careful some days." Which is why I avoid giving out my name, too many things can use a name against me, "Is there something I can help you with?" I unlocked my door and stepped inside, she followed quickly behind, so no vampire either.

She waddled over to the nearest chair and eased herself down slowly. "I'm pregnant."

"Clearly."

"Cute. I wasn't pregnant last week."

"You look-"

"Six months pregnant? Six and a half according to my doctor. He wanted to have me committed." She sighed.

I sat across from her, "May I?" She waved me on rolled up her shirt exposing her swelled stomach to me. Her pregnant belly looked out of place on her fit body, it was clear she enjoyed the gym. Her skin was perfectly smooth, suggesting she even ate right, something most people fail too. She wasn't wearing makeup but it didn't appear to be from a lack of enthusiasm but perhaps because she trusted the experts who told her it was bad for her skin. Even without it she was beautiful. "And your positive there wasn't a man in your life before this?"

"Mr. Dresden, there has never been a man in my life." It took me a second to realize what she meant, "Yup, I got the gold star to prove it."

"There wasn't say...a night you can't account for six months ago?"

"No. I was in training until last month. And I hadn't exactly been burning up the sheets before then either."

"Okay, any sexual activity at all?"

"About a week ago I went to a club;"