And after the party, its the ho-tel lobby

Well, that was...neat. I just offed some guy because the person I hate most in the universe told me to. And I really didn't feel that bad about it. Bordering on good, even. He wanted to ban porno and he was an insufferable little-pricked little prick. I'm glad he's dead, even though I'm not completely ecstatic I'm the one who made him that way. I got off the bus again.

"Take two. Ahem. Can you believe that dork!? Callin' me unoriginal, callin' mama Pool a liar. I oughtta go back in there and kill him."

"Ooo...kay. You already killed him, didn't you?"

"You bet your cute blue butt, I did! Killed 'im real good! He was all 'I'm That guy and where's my toupee?' and I was all 'you won't need it where you're going', and he was all 'oh, please mr. Deadpool sir, don't hurt me! i'm ever so afraid of you!' and I was all 'Pool says you're dead, bitch!' and he was all 'AIIEEEEEEEEEEEE' and my gun was all 'rat-ta-tat-tat' and I was all 'how do ya like them apples!?' and he was all-"

"Please, just stop. I was less than a meter from you, I heard what happened."

"Oh. Well, I mighta embellished just a smidgen of a skosh, but for the most part it was true."

"No it wasn't." Then, she leaned in close and whispered "But if you wanna tell the others that, I won't disagree." Then she gave me a little peck on the ear, and I felt it even through the mask. I was half-tempted to take it off, but girls don't give pecks to guys who look like jerky gone wrong. The femme feline fatale gave me a little wink and put her hand on my shoulder. Yay, time for bouncy-

...bouncy? Suddenly, instead of being surrounded by a smokin' babe and plenty of spots to have a nice loud love scene, I'm starin' the other 'Rection X guys in the face. That healing factor the doctor talked about didn't keep my semi from dying. If you can keep a chubby around Wolverine, you're either gay with low standards or a hornier man than I. But Wolverine was just standing there, and for once I wish the rest (except Siryn) would have followed his example. Sabertooth, Brando and Sauron all came up to congratulate me. Eventually.

"So," Sabertooth asked. "Didja puss out on us, new guy? Did the frail have to clean up after you?"

"Certainly not," I retort. "Just dig my empty clip, Fuzzy!" I eject the mag from my MP5 and Sabertooth verifies it's emptiness.

"His sword's bloody too," Wolverine added after sniffing the air.

"So it is," Toothy said with glee. "Not bad for a newbie, Inky."

"Inky?"

"'Cause o' yer black costume, kid."

Kitty whispered in what used to be an ear of mine "Sabertooth isn't too good with names."

"But he's not too bad with his ears, girl," Sabertooth replied with some growl in his voice. I fingered my loaded gun in case he tied to hit on my girl, literally.

"Come now, no need for all that," Fatty o'Lardy said, getting in the middle of us all. "Our new member has gotten his first kill, which means today is a day for celebration and his starting down the road to being respected."

"He can kill all the fat middle-aged guys he wants, but that don't mean I'll respect him, bub." Guess who that was. Hint: he said bub. "He's too soft. His head ain't in the game."

"Come on, Wolverine, he did his job," Copycat said.

"Lemme ask ya this. Did he do his job quick and professional or did he goof off, make lame jokes and take way too long to do it?"

"They were NOT lame," I objected.

"That's what I thought. Face it, Wilson. You'll always be a second-stringer." Wolvy left, hopefully in search of some stool softener, leaving the rest of...us....to.....

Did he just call me "Wilson"?