An Intervention

Everything jerked to a stop again.

"Huh?" said Evan, turning around on the bench. The sex fairy was hovering before him at eye level, sporting a mildly disproving frown.

"I'm disappointed. Didn't you want to test out your new body right away," she says. "I mean, I upgraded you and everything, and you aren't using it at all. That girl you ran into -- any of those girls who were looking at you in class -- you could have had any one of them. They all wanted you. You are actually some of my better work," she added

"Maybe after school," Evan replied. "I don't want to miss class."

"Oh, for heaven's sake," said the fairy, facepalming. "Well, I guess you've only had that body for an hour, so you haven't really learned what you can get away with yet. Here, I'll help you out. Hold out your hand."

Evan held out his hand as instructed, and she her wand over it. A shower of sparkles fell over his hand, and he was suddenly holding a stack of Post-It notes. At least they looked like Post-Its at first glance. They were simple yellow squares, with "EXCUSED ABSENCE FOR SEXUAL INTERCOURSE" printed across the top. "Please excuse Evan and ___. They could not attend class as they were fucking," followed by the preprinted signature of the principal. Evan flipped through the stack; they were all the same. Also, the stack seemed to have way more pages than it should for its size, and had other variations that seemed to be excuses for jobs, jury duty, parking tickets, and many other things, with most of the fields blank. Even supposed that was because even magic couldn't predict the future, so those would fill in when needed.

"How can this work?" Evan asked. "Reality must have to change an awful lot --"

"Argh!!!!" cried the fairy, interrupting him. "Look, I don't know how it works. It just does. What, no thank you?"