A Bigger Splat

The trapdoor dropped open beneath Emily's bare feet. There was a brief squeal, and then it slid shut again. The halls of the mirror maze were empty.

Emily could feel something cold and sticky brushing against her toes. She looked down.

She was dangling above an enormous vat of caramel custard, topped with a layer of vanilla cream. Itwas the biggest dessert she'd ever seen. Falling in would be an... interesting experience.

She looked up.

She was clinging for dear life to her T-shirt, which had snagged on a rafter high overhead. That was both good and bad. Good, because it gave her something to cling on to. Bad, because it had been pulled right off her body.

She hung there, swaying gently, in the secret custard room in the basement of the funhouse, wondering what fiendish mastermind had built this place. Surely that nice boy Nathan didn't know anything about all these tricks and traps. He wouldn't have let her go in by herself if he'd known she stood the risk of being pied in the face!

She had to get out of here. She couldn't just dangle here forever. What if someone came in? Probably Nathan would get worried and come looking for her. And when he opened the basement door he'd find her hanging from her T-shirt over a huge vat of custard, completely helpless. And, of course, nude.

Her face coloured at the thought. She couldn't imagine anything more embarrassing than being seen naked by Nathan. He'd be so disappointed in her! She'd get in so much trouble!

She had to get out of her. Preferably uncustarded.

But she had no how she was going to get down.

And her arms were already getting tired.

There was a squeal, and a splat. There was a long pause.

Then, Emily's head emerged from the vat of custard. She looked dishevelled and bedraggled and very, very sticky. Slowly, she began to wade towards the side. It was just deep enough that her toes could touch the bottom.

She hauled herself up over the side of the vat and stood on the floor of the basement, looking down at herself. She was a mess. A naked, custardy mess. What kind of pervert built this, anyway? Did people actually like this kind of thing?

There had be a way out of her. Preferably, a very private way out.

She looked around.

A hatch in the wall flew open and a clown mannequin flew out, holding an old-fashioned camera. As the flashbulb popped, a high-pitched robot voice screamed "Surprise!" Emily squealed, jumped backwards and fell right back into the vat.

As she splashed around, whimpering, Nathan's mind was racing. A number of plans were beginning to form in Nathan's mind. A number of plans that would make the rest of the day very memorable for that poor, naked, unlucky, smug bitch Emily.

Of course, he thought, he could be the bigger man. Yes. That would be the right thing to do. Surely even smug bitches deserved a little bit of respect. After all, they were still women.

Maybe he should ignore his own worst impulses. Maybe he should just let her go.