Fight illusion

The problem of ironing a shirt is that the mundane nature of the operation opens your mind to many thoughts. Some of them are joyful, but most of the time, what comes to you in that situation is depressing. Yes, on paper my life was perfect and mirrored exactly what I wanted: a wonderful daughter, a lovely husband, a big house with a garden, and a good average job. Yet, like many people in my situation, I knew that something was missing, and I was perfectly aware that a big part of it was sex. For more than 20 years, sex was never a concern in my life; I was used to being a hot and sporty sexy girl in my prime, and there were plenty of men who would have done anything to spend some hours with me. But time flows unmercifully. As soon as I got closer to my 40s, I noticed a dramatic fall in lust. It wasn't my husband's fault, I guess. On the opposite, he was doing all that was in his power to please me sexually, but couldn't change who he was...namely, a successful man in life and a complete loser in bed.

When we firstly met, all his friends had warned him to be careful because I was a rare kind of strong and sadistic female, very keen on crumbling the masculinity of my suitors. Yet, he got through the challenge. To my surprise, he passed phase 1 - when I would reveal my sadistic proclivity - without a flinch. Even more striking, he passed phase 2 - when I would try to harass my dates - with no problems. Incredibly, he even passed phase 3, when I would try to fight those men, hoping for some rough final fun. He never retreated, just did his best to repel me physically, inevitably losing. The reward for his stubbornness was sex. All the others before him had fled sooner or later, either upset that a woman could face them physically (notwithstanding that she was an amateur judoka) or just frightened by that kind of relationship. He never gave up though and returned to my beatings over and over. Eventually, the tussles lasted less and sex longer each time, so I married him and bore a daughter at the young age of 23. Now I have just turned 41, and our sexual life is different. He still enjoys my beatings, but for me playing with his body and mind is like going to a land where I have already explored every corner. Maybe I just need a vacation or... the opportunity to meet someone else who could help me change my life.