You did, all right!

As your status screen pops up, you gasp, your disbelief growing. You did, you really did! Elation courses through you as you scan your revised status screen.

Waitress

Race: Human
Level: 1 -> 5
Hit Points: 1 -> 21
Mana: 0 -> 5
Melee Attack: 1 -> 5
Ranged Attack: 0
Magic Attack: 0
Physical Defense: 0 -> 5

No weaknesses or resistances

Special Abilities:
Exceptional Balance: resistant to trip, knockdown, bum-rush, and overrun attempts. 20% Bonus to checks involving balance such as climbing, tightrope walking, and holding heavy objects on top of your head.
Charming: You can easily ingratiate yourself to others, making them more likely to do what you want. You gain a 10% discount at all shops and earn 25% more from working at a 'Job'. You also get a 50% chance to avoid angering NPCs when you make a 'bad request' in negotiations.
Basic Evasion: You have 5% chance to evade physical attacks.

It's not much, but it's something. You've finally gained an explanation for those two abilities you've had for ages, and you even have a Defense value now. Unfortunately, it won't protect you from anything more than a slight blow, and 5% evasion is barely better than nothing, but still! You've leveled!

You **** your mind back to your current problems. You're still unarmored, effectively unarmed, and trapped in a city in the midst of a massive raid.