Yes - but he stays faithful to Elizabeth

There was one girl in particular—Jessica—who made my life a living hell: long legs, tiny waist, dark hair that reached down to her ass, and absolutely SPECTACULAR tits. Skinny everywhere except the bust, that girl was the definition of “top-heavy.”

And she was totally devoid of modesty. Each night, Jessica would stroll down the hallway between her room and the showers—a route that took her right past my door—wearing nothing but a frayed bath towel.

Still, all that was manageable. Nothing five minutes and a fistful of Kleenex couldn’t solve. No, the thing that made Jessica so horrible was the fact that she and I had so much in common. We liked the same movies, read the same books, shared more than half of our classes, and she was a barista at my favorite off-campus café.

She was perfect girlfriend material. If I’d made a pass at her, the awful truth was that she’d probably have gone out with me. And I had to see her EVERY DAY.

On the other side of the country, Elizabeth was going through a similar ordeal with some cute guy she met in her “human sexuality” class, of all things. I don’t imagine things were any easier on her.

Elizabeth and I turned to Stephanie and Simon for support. They were struggling with the long-distance thing as well, and their commiseration via phone or AIM (yes, we chatted over AIM back then), was my only lifeline on those lonely nights when I was either so lonely or so horny I thought I would go insane.

Then they broke up.

They broke up! After all that drama our senior year of high school, Simon and Stephanie couldn’t last just one semester apart. I guess I shouldn’t have been so surprised, given how difficult things were for Elizabeth and I. But it didn’t much help our own resolve, seeing our best friends give up on their relationship.

Alas, Simon and Stephanie went their separate ways, finding new loves and lovers. By the time we were all halfway through our second semester of college, it was plainly obvious to both Elizabeth and myself that our friends were happier for having split up.