Throw out her toy

I put up with her ignoring me and playing with her new toy for about ten days. Despite a couple of requests for some attention, she made a point of playing with her dildo and making sure I knew.

This was compounded by the fact that she was dressing particularly fine over this time. Despite the frequent five finger shuffle, I was getting more and more frustrated. I could not believe I was getting jealous of a dildo, but there you are - sad I know.

Eventually I had had enough.

"Where's my toy?" Helen did not look best pleased as she burst into the lounge.

"I binned it. You should be spending some time focused on me!" Now we all know this was not going to work as a strategy that was going to get me some hot sex, but I was making a point.

What we also all know is that wives are much better at making a point than their husbands, as I was about to find out.