Duality

I.

I can't see, I can't see outside my head. Something is wrong, something feels wrong, why am I not in control? My legs, they walk without my say, my body moves on its own and I am left feeling lost from my own. I want to scream, cry for help as loud as I can, but I have no voice, my body won't listen to me. I am not myself, I am not me.

"I bet it feels familiar, doesn't it?"

What was that, are you stuck here as well? There is no color here, no object or image, only blank. What is this, I feel gone inside my own head. Why are you here?

"Turn around, do you see me yet?"

No, I can't, I can't see anything.

"Look harder, I mean really look for me."

She gasped, there was something distinct, something real! Out of nothing came something, someone was standing by, arms crossed with a feminine outline to her. The image was growing stronger, I could see her tapping her arm waiting for my sight to come. Long silver hair, hypnotic yellow eyes, with a distinct set of brown spots stained on her lacking a pattern to follow. She smiled and waved her paw once our eyes met, it was colored brown.

"You're not doing so hot, hotshot. I guess we've seen better days, huh?"

"Yea... gasp! My voice!"

She giggled. "Yea, you can talk. Trust me, it's not as fun as you would like. Too often people around you didn't have anything nice to say."

KuliKuli felt her ears drop slightly, a reminder of her able to feel like herself again. Looking down, she could see herself this time, she was standing still and lacking any clothes, just the soft skin of her female body paired with furry feline paws for hands and feet. Her tails unwrapped from her waist and wagged freely, she lifted her paws up high and stretched, pushing her breasts outward as the mysterious woman watched and snickered.

"You know, I never did like how small they look. The other girls came out with bigger boobs, and even Mom has a nice bust to her."

KuliKuli yawned and looked down to face her. "I didn't like them either, but they don't bother me so much as they use to."

"Yea, I guess having a Master helps with that."

"Master, right! I need to find him, I need to... no." She fell to her knees, feeling herself split in half as she began to remember... "He's not coming back."

"You made him promise not to rescue you, did you forget?" She crouched down, petting the soft hair and brushing it nicely. "I wouldn't have done that, leaving him. I wanted that life, that fantasy of finding a mate, someone you can't live without. Someone who made me feel important."

KuliKuli looked up. "You don't need someone to do that, it helps but not enough if you don't believe it yourself."

Her response made this woman raise her eyes, standing up to her feet. "Wow, you sound just like Mom. Don't call me sweetie."

"Pfft, she calls you that as well? So weird."

"Super weird, I'm not five anymore Mom. I'm an adult, sort of."

"Me too, I think. Actually, I can't remember how old I am. Am I... an adult?"

The woman stared back at her and patted her arm, passing by her. "You're crazy old, like seventies old."

"Okay, I know I'm not that old!"

She chuckled. "Of course. Are you okay?"

KuliKuli shook her head, walking around to find nothing. "No, anything but. I feel cold, cold and confused. I was... I was in a thingy, with my family. My sisters, my Mom,-"

"Don't forget Dad, you have him now!" She smirked, noting the look on KuliKuli's face. "Aww cheer up, you've always wondered about your Dad! Oh wait, that was me. You never even thought about him."

"That's not true, I didn't remember that's all."

The Nekomata scoffed, leaned against thin air as if there were a wall she could not see. "You know, I remember someone mention before that it would be a privilege to forget. So why did you do it?"

"Why did I do what?"

"Why did you forget?" KuliKuli hesitated and turned away. "You know if you wanted to, you would figure out more about yourself. There's that friend of yours, the hoo-man girl. What's her name?"

"Jay-Jay, Janette?"

"That's the one who kept studying you and rewarding you with free fruit, wasn't she? Just keep moving her hand left and right on her empty book. You could have asked for her help."

"I didn't want her help, I didn't need any. I was fine."

"More than fine, you were happy! Don't be modest Kuli, gloat! Man in your life who worshipped you, a house with a comfy bed, all the food you could eat, and heck you were even learning to be more hoo-man. Everything we ever wanted, life was a dream. But then you woke up."

"Don't."

"They found you when they were looking for me."

"I said don't!" She growled, frowning and feeling her fur tense. But it didn't faze her, she paid no attention and continued walking in circles around her.

"I never saw Na'Vi so broken before when you didn't recognize her. Mom put up a strong face, but Syri showed how scared she was. They came to rescue you, but it was too late. You never wanted to be rescued, you were already safe."

"I was happy."

"And when they came, you were upset. Distraught! Felt like you had to choose now, Nekomata Cat Girl? Or would you prefer just a girl? It's okay, I felt guilty when I admitted it too." She mentioned, walking away.

"What did you say to her?"

She stopped, keeping her back to her. "I told her I wish I was never a Monster at all, that I wanted to be a hoo-man."

KuliKuli felt her heart sink, feeling her Mother's words like a distant memory. "I was angry."

"We were caught walking out to the hoo-man village when we shouldn't have. Do you remember why you were so... stubborn, I think she put it like that? Yea, that sounds like Mom. She couldn't answer a simple question."

"Where's Dad."

"Where's Dad." She turned around. "All the other families had several dads visit them now and then. Some, not all but some. It hurt, and you couldn't complain because hey, at least you have a Mom and two sisters. Na'Vi couldn't even have that, so who are you to behave so entitled?"

"It wasn't fair."

"Life never was. That's why we prefer our dreams, where we are in control even if the dream means having no control."

"I, I didn't want this."

"Yes you did, you loved it. You were enjoying it."

"You're wrong, I wasn't happy about forgetting, I was... I didn't. Everything was new to me, I couldn't remember. Felix was teaching me everything, he helped me learn more." She hugged her chest, wrapping her tails around her waist.

"Maybe it was a mistake to have stayed, maybe I should have kept running."

"You really believe that? Fine, let's play what if. What if you left, the door was parted open for you and he was on the other side. Bowl of milk in hand, sure you had a taste of him before, I remember that. He had a very sweet aftertaste." She giggled. "But he was new, he was a hoo-man. He was scary."

"He was scared, just like me. I didn't know what he would do, I wanted to leave."

"But you stayed." Behind her became a recreation of that moment when it all began, with Felix rescuing an unconscious cat from the ruins of a crumbled building. The storm was feirce, but he managed to take her home with him. As she spoke, the memory continued like a scene in a play. "He fed you and nourished you back to health, we hadn't eaten in a while. Once he slept, we grew thirsty again. And then, you know."

KuliKuli blushed as she saw herself sneak underneath the bed covers between Felix's legs, her head beginning to move up and down in a gentle rhythm. If was a fond memory, just not the sort of detail to mention to friends.

"Then he woke up and saw you for your true form, but he didn't attack you. He offered milk, and you took his offer. Weeks go by and you made a hoo-man friend, Janette. Weeks later, Felix gets attacked by a stranger, a werewolf."

"Her name is Reta."

"Yes, her. She wanted him."

"He was mine, my Master, my Mate."

"She was your enemy."

"But she became my friend. She was hurting inside, and I wanted to help. She was like me."

"Like you." The cat agreed, watching as the memory shifted to Felix, KuliKuli, Reta and Janette. Janette was taking them to her house for the first time. "That was a good night, wasn't it? Remember how it ended?"

KuliKuli smiled and placed her paws behind her. "I think I do, yea."

"Like animals in heat." She shifted in her stance, before the memory changed to their encounter with Emyri, Syri and Dimyri, followed by the fight she had with Na'Vi. "That's where it changed, where your family found you."

KuliKuli nodded, swallowing and feeling nervous. "So much just started, I thought I had everything under control. Thought I knew what I was doing then. I even... I even began to regret them finding me."

"I understand, better than anyone else could. A Hunter was after you, then came the guy who hired him, a Priest. A religious nut with a cult following under him without question."

"We lost."

"You gave up, turned yourselves in."

"He had Mom, Reta and Na'Vi."

"And now he has us."

KuliKuli looked up as suddenly the scene began to move in reverse, missing her family, missing her friends, missing everything.

"Now, imagine if you did leave, what would happen to them? Janette would still have a house, yes? What about Felix?"

Behind her, Felix was calmly picking apples from the apple trees when Reta pounced onto him, pinning him down like before. KuliKuli gasped, this was different. Felix looked frail, unhappy inside. His eyes looked sad, his structure remained thin and... he looked very much like the day she first laid eyes on him.

Reta lifted her head, grinning at last for finding a decent catch. Honestly, she preferred someone with a bit more muscle to him, this man was lacking a few meals to keep him healthy. No matter, she tracked down someone closest to her and she was in no position to be picky. The need was unbearable, and it was rising out of her control.

Felix gasped, this wasn't an animal, not entirely but a woman. Her smirk was malicious, her hair a dark blue tone, bright yellow eyes stared hungrily at him. They were rather almond shaped, her eyes were slanted and her paws bared their claws on his chest, her wolf tail wagging behind her.

This was a werewolf.

"Kon'nichiwa."

She giggled and ran her paw slowly down his chest playfully.

"It's like paper, I could break you so easily with my claws."

"Please, don't kill me." He shivered, feeling his heart stuck to his throat. His plea filled her with sudden laughter as she bared her eyes on him.

"I'm not going to kill you. I seem to be lost for the longest time, and in search for a mate. What do you know, I seem to have found one! I usually don't do this with strangers so allow me to introduce myself, I am Reta. Norowa Reta, and we are going to be realllll close very soon."

She licked her lips, grinding herself on him. His strength had gone along with his voice as she had extended her claws outward now. Keeping eye contact, she bit her lip as in time his body began to reciprocate, rewarding her with that firm growth beneath where she sat upon him.

"There he is, don't be shy. Give in to me, I need this. I've wanted this, gods I've been hungry for so long."

He kelt quiet, glancing down at her breasts rocking gently as she swayed forward and back. They were a pleasant sight during this scare, he wondered if this was the moment he would be stripped of all he had left to give, his virginity. Her paws brushed under his clothes, rubbing and feeling his chest and heart beat.

"You know, you do look rather cute right now. Maybe it's the horny bit talking, but you don't look halfbad. Well, maybe add some meat to tone out your body and it will do. What do you say, ever fucked a werewolf before?"

"N-No ma'am."

"Aah, wait- ever laid with a woman before?" He shook his head. "Man?"

Same response, this brought a wide grin to her face. "By the gods, I caught myself a virgin. I always had this fantasy of taking a boy and making him into a man." Kneeling down, she nuzzled her face into his neck and inhaled deeply, ripping his shirt away as she sighed with a look of bliss. "Yea, unmarked. This is... wow. I think, I think I hit gold. What's your name?"

"Ah, Felix." He giggled as she ran her furry paws over his body.

"Aww, your ticklish. We're going to get to know each other Felix, we're going to become reallllll close." She whispered, sneaking a kiss to his lips.

KuliKuli gasped, covering her face as he returned the kiss, both of them holding each other, exploring the other under the sunlight outdoors for all to see. The mystery woman noticed this and rolled her eyes.

"You don't have a problem letting them sleep together before, why now?"

"That's different, she knew he was mine and he knew as well. This, th-this is... he's-"

"Gone, with her now. If you never showed up, if you left, he would still have his happy ending." KuliKuli squeezed her eyes, forcing any tears away before looking back at the show. Reta was rubbing her body against him now, his member sliding between the wetness she had dripping out. His hands were on her thighs, she was loving it with a smile and a blush. Before he could stick it in, she pushed him back and waved her paw.

"Fuck, as much as I want to and I really really want to, I want this to last. I want this to be special for us, Felix." It was like every word delivered a dagger to the heart, KuliKuli watched as Reta kissed him, kissed his body, licking and tasting his thighs and waist, overloading his senses. But she was rough compared to her, she grabbed and lifted him up by his thighs, Felix now resting his weight his back. His legs were at either side of her, her tongue licking and painting up and down his meaty shaft in long strokes . He groaned, he was enjoying this after all despite her dominance over him. In fact, it looked like he enjoyed her taking control. It wasn't long until she opened wide, revealing her canine sharp teeth before swallowing his cock in one thrust, pushing him down her throat and savoring every throb and pulse he made.

That one surpised both girls, and Felix gave in.

"Aaaaa-Ooooooooooooohhhhhhhh! Aaaaa~aahhh....ahnnn..."

He opened his eyes, feeling his hands gripping her hair as she looked up at him with his dick between her tight lips. He expected her to be furious, but rather she was brushing his thighs before reaching up to touch his cheek. He blushed for once, groaning as her tongue hugged and wrapped his sensitive dick to keep him ready and willing. He was nice and wet, with a squishy sound as she bobbed her head up and down showing a rather shiny cock until she let him slip out, poking her cheek.

"Aah-sorry!"

She giggled, patting his leg and leaning her head far back. He witnessed her swallow, a large mouthful of his seed sliding down her tongue and heading through her throat by a visual gulp! It was something he had never seen, and left him throbbing for more.

She flicked his cock and smiled. "Oh yea, I like you already. You may look frail but you're strong where it counts. Normally I'd ride that cute face of yours but my legs are getting sticky right now. So, buckle up soldier."

She winked, letting his legs drop before sitting up, hovering her glistening pussy over his soldier. "Your move, lover."

Felix swallowed, moving his dick into place as she lowered herself, opening up for him and welcoming him to his new home with a tight, warm embrace. Her leg twitched and she slipped, sliding his length in one go by accident. He groaned but she paused and stared forward with a wide mouth, her tummy convulsing and her waist twitching.

"Hey, hey are you okay?"

"Aah!" She yelped, squeezing her eyes shut and leaning heavily on him. "Aaaaaaaahhh-! Uhhhnn.... aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh..."

During her reaction, Felix felt himself being gripped, massaged, then squirted on as suddenly her juices dripped down his legs. He looked worried despite the heavenly feeling, but she looked up at smiled, nodding her head.

"That hit the spot. Fuck me, lover boy."

KuliKuli felt her chest, relenting from the heartache which stuck tk her likd glue since this vision began. She continued watching them enjoy each other, loving one another for most of the day it seemed. But she had stopped watching them for a while now, staring through the couple almost as the stranger approached her.

"It hurts, but it's true. He would still have his mate, his happy ending, without you. But not you, you never deserved it. You were always meant to be a cat in a cage."

KuliKuli stayed quiet, the woman paused allowing her to respond in any way, to retaliate in any motion, but nothing ever came. Odd, so she continued.

"I mean, I know it's a hard pill to swallow but it's the truth. You rejected your memories so you can stay happy with Felix, you stuck with him because you wanted to live the fantasy of having a mate, of falling in love and living a loving life. But that's not your life Kuli, it's not who you are. Trust me, I tried to break free from my cage and look how that left me? Left us both in the same cage, all over again."

"You don't get it, do you? I don't think you ever understood."

She turned to look, raising her eye as KuliKuli began to speak.

"You make it seem like I'm the bad guy for wanting this, but you wanted it too. And so did Na'Vi, so did Mother, so do all of us. Maybe I did make a mess of things, but look at all the good that came of it."

The image had faded away, replaced with Janette when she ushered KuliKuli and Felix to hide under one of her tables. Then, it was shifted to show Syri licking Janette's cheek, then when they met Nyitzcha and Kou Yoku.

"I know I made a mess of things, but you're forgetting all the good that we lived through. The friends we made, the mates that came of it. None of that would have happened if I left." She turned to face her. "Yes it hurts seeing Felix live a happy life without me, but you know what? I'm glad for him in the end. Master is a better man with or without me, and he deserves to be happy. That's what love is, wanting someone you care so much for to be happy, wishing them better. And if it means he lives without me, then I'll live through the heartache to see him smile again. To know he is living a better life."

"What good comes from letting them lose their friends and lovers?"

KuliKuli frowned. "Because they had the experience, like we did remember? We made a promise, we just wanted to know what it was like to find a mate and be happy together. Of course I'm sad that it's gone, but I'm also happy that it happened. I know you can be too, because you're just like me."

"We are not the same." She relented, stepping back.

KuliKuli sighed. "I used to think that, Mother had to help me figure that out as well. But the truth is, we are different but we're also alike. We were never two different people, we are Nityri and KuliKuli. For a long time, I was fighting to be away from you, but I need you know more than ever. I can't do this without you, please Nityri."

Nityri spun around, shaking her head and folding her arms. "No! Nothing good came from us, why work with you?"

"Don't do it for me, do it for them." She responded, as Nityri looked around to find herself surrounded by her clutter, so many familiar faces smiling and facing her. In the surface was her family Emyri, Dimyri, Syri, and Na'Vi, along with her friends Janette, Nyitzcha, Kou, and Felix at the center. The place was lit up now, not a shadow in sight, in fact they had found themselves back outside near the river where they often went to enjoy the landscape and image, a beautiful scenery.

Nityri felt overwhelmed, tears swelling in her eyes as KuliKuli wrapped her arms around her and hekd her tight. "I can't, I don't want to lose them again."

"Help me help you, so we can help them."

Nityri closed her eyes before looking away. "Not for you, for them."

"For them." KuliKuli repeated, feeling warmer inside, as if suddenly everyone present around them closed in for a group hug. It felt pleasant, feeling safe once more.

Nityri broke away from their arms, turning to face KuliKuli. "Well, you might want to wake up if we're to get started."

KuliKuli gasped, coming to just in time to see the door lock them in as the effects of the Demon's Eye were removed. Rubbing her head, she looked around to find her Mother and two sisters with her. Without warning, she jumped on Emyri, squeezing her tight and resting her head on her shoulder. Emyri had snapped out from the hypnotic effect before realizing her daughter holding her.

"KuliKuli! Er, hey? Is... are you, everything okay dear?" She asked, puzzled as a moment ago, her daughter had been livid with her.

KuliKuli smiled, patting Syri's head much to her annoyance. "Hey, quit it! Why are you so happy?"

"Because I'm happy to see you guys again, that's why. I... Na'Vi?" She looked back and kneeled down, rubbing Na'Vi's head. She mumbled and opened her eyes, looking up at her ex. "Still with us?"

"If you have room..." She whispered.

"Always. Mom, we need to help her recover. Any remedy?"

"No, none. We weren't exactly allowed to pack our bags, sweetie."

She nodded. "We'll get out somehow, I know it."

"You sound confident." Dimyri asked, "What changed?"

KuliKuli smiled. "I've been here before, I have an idea."

Just as long as you help me help them.

"Fine, just this once. We've nothing more to lose, after all." Nityri replied, a light whisper like a passing thought in KuliKuli's mind. "For them."

Always.

---

Author's Words:

My 200th chapter, both a recollection of past events in the story as well as the introduction of new content. I wanted this to be much like Chapter 55: Let's Recap! Only without the 4th wall break. Thank you so much for following KuliKuli for 200 chapters, and I hope you don't mind watching to see how this ends.