A night at a Witch’s Cabin

Minerva’s cabin was surprisingly close, merely hidden behind a thin veil of magic to keep safe from passersby. In retrospect, it was quite the odd group arriving at the cabin. Three adventurers, a merchant and her mule, a witch, and a cyclops. Not exactly what I was expecting when I was woken up for watch this morning.

“This is it,” said Minerva, pointing to a log cabin that was surprisingly large. She led us inside, except for Gor, who was obviously too large to fit inside, and Hershel, who Flora tied up outside. “The guest rooms are upstairs. Make yourselves at home while I finish tending to Gor. But please, don’t touch anything.” The witch grabbed a few supplies from the counter before heading back outside.

“How, the fuck, did you manage that, Lucille?” I asked.

“No clue. It appears she was a bit of a pushover,” said Lucille.

“Let’s check out the guest rooms,” Flora suggested. We followed her up the nearby staircase. On the second floor, there were five doors, two on each side of the hallway, and one at the end. The one at the end’s door was intricately carved, leading us to the assumption it belonged to Minerva, so we opened the remaining four rooms. As they all appeared mostly the same, we arbitrarily assigned them, and I got the second door on the left.

Inside my new room, I was hesitant to let go of my sword just yet, so I decided to just leave my pack inside before going to snoop around like a good active character. After making sure the coast was clear, I opened the door to Minerva’s room.

It looked simple enough, as far as a witch’s room went. Queen sized bed against the far wall. A large cauldron in the corner next to shelves full of strange looking ingredients in jars labeled things like “Mimic Ambrosia” or “Nether Extract” or “Orphan’s Tears”. Chuckling slightly at the last one, I looked at the other end of the room.

There was a pair of bookcases, both filled with various books. All appeared to be rather frequently read. At least judging by the lack of dust. That, or she’s just a clean freak. I thumbed through a few books, seeing if the secret passage behind the bookcase cliché was real.

It was about half real. After pulling on a certain book, several portions of the room changed due to rotating walls. The alchemy corner turned around to reveal an assortment of BDSM equipment. The bed flipped over to reveal a heart shaped bed with handcuffs attached to each corner of the bed. The bookshelves turned around to reveal more bookshelves, now filled with smut.

Turns out, she wasn’t a clean freak. Just a normal freak.

I quickly thumbed through the smut, searching for the switch to put everything back. I eventually found it and slinked back out of the room. Back in the hallway, I decided to keep what I found to myself. Unfortunately, it didn’t matter. I wouldn’t have the opportunity to tell anyone. Minerva was standing in the hallway, and she loooked piiiiisssssseeeeddd.