Dance around the issue

"Um... it went all right. She's pretty cool."

"So, no action?" Carl helps himself to a beer and throws himself onto the couch.

"Well... that depends on what you mean by 'action'."

Carl thinks for a moment. "Hmm... well, one way of looking at it would be that if you put your dick into her at any point, that would pretty much qualify."

"Dude, it was a first date!" You're starting to wonder whether you're going to be able to hide this. Carl's known you long enought to make it hard to lie to him.

"Dude, some girls put out on a first date!" he says.

You think carefully. Telling about getting laid with Julie wouldn't really be a violation of the rules, because you hadn't even heard about the whole House Stud thing at that point, and if the date had ended right there you probably would be giving Carl details right about now. "Well, if you want to get technical about it, yeah, I did get some action."

"Whoa! What kind of action?"

"The kind where I put my dick into her."

"Fuckin' A, man!" he shouts. "So, was she good?"

"She was right there for it, dude, She was hot."

Carl quaffs the beer and grabs another one. "So, what happened next?"

You shrug. "Well, I met a few of her friends, we talked for a bit, and I went home."

"Think you'll go out with her again?"

"Actually, I was sort of wondering about that when you came in." You pause. "Her friends seem to think it's a good idea, but it would have to be sort of an exclusive relationship. I just don't know if I'm up for it."

Carl raises an eyebrow. "I get the idea there's something you're not telling me."

"Nope. Nothing major." That's it - you're officially lying to your pal now.

"Come on, man. You can tell me."

You shake your head. "Really, there's nothing else!"

Carl sighs. "Fuck, man, I'm really sorry about this."

"About what?"

In answer to your question, he opens up his jacket and holds up a microphone. "The girls wanted to make sure you wouldn't tell," he said. "Dude, I told them I didn't want to do it, but they said they'd fire me if I didn't. I'm really fuckin' sorry, man."

You begin to get what this is about, and it pisses you off a bit. "They sent you over here to test me?"

"I know, man, I'm a first-class jerk, but hey, come on! There's like, sixty of them, and they're so fuckin' hot! How the hell do you say no to that? And they wouldn't have done anything seriously bad to you if you'd told me, I made them promise that much. But they wanted to be sure you weren't in here calling the press or something!"

The full reality of what Carl's saying starts to sink in. "So, you're one of their fuck-boys then?"

"You got it, dude," Carl says with a grin. "For the past two months, ever since I went out with Natalie. She brought me in, and I jumped on it right away. Since then, I've gotten laid at least four times a week and I've had almost every girl in the fuckin' house. Why do you think I told you to go out with Julie? And now you're telling them Maybe, what the fuck is up with that?"

"I don't know!" you say. "I figured there had to be a downside to all this, so I wanted to think about it."

"Dude: you've got the fuckin' brass ring here. You can get laid with beautiful and horny girls as much as you want. And no matter what you're into, I guarantee that one of them is into it too. Yeah, you gotta put up with some shit, like this whole thing they made me do tonight, but it's worth it, man! And I've been to two House parties so far, and they fuckin' pull out the stops! Three weeks ago, we went to this private beach, and I had four different girls in the sand before the night was out!"

Well, Carl's given you something to think about. You're tempted to just throw caution to the winds and sign up right now. On the other hand, here's something you were kind of hoping for, someone who could give you some advice. But you can't shake the feeling of being pretty pissed at him for setting you up for what might have been a major fall.