"Edward."

I sighed. It was looking like everyone was going to see my small wardrobe malfunction today. Still, I rose from my chair and made my way to the front, trying to casually hold my hand over my groin. As I passed Camilla she looked at me and gave a wink and a smirk.

Miss McGowan handed me a pen.

"Go on, then." she gestured to the board.

I looked at the problem. I had done the homework, of course, so this seemed vaguely familiar, but I was really not fond of maths. Still...

I took a deep breath, and added a number to the equation.

"Five?" Miss McGowan said, "Are you sure?"

"Not yet..." I replied. "I think..." I touched the pen to the board to add another digit, and as I did the pen slipped from my fingers and fell to the floor.

"You're not trying to stall, are you, Edward?" she asked.

"No, I think I know this." I quickly bent to grab the pen.

RIP!

The harsh tearing noise echoed around the classroom, followed a moment later by laughter.

"Oh, no." I gasped, "I've split my trousers, haven't I?"

"Quite a lot, yes." even Miss McGowan was struggling to hold in a giggle.

I remember to my horror that my red boxer-briefs included a picture of Kermit from the Muppets printed across the seat, his smiling face now displayed to the entire class!