Try your powers on the agent

If there was ever a time to make good use of mind control powers, it is now. You focus on Agent Hanson and think, “Just get up and leave. Forget you were ever here. Leave us alone.”

Instantly, Agent Hanson stops talking, and her face takes on a blank expression. In a monotone voice say says, “Yes, Master... To hear is to obey. I will do whatever you command.”

She turns toward the door, and you breath a sigh of relief. Then, without warning, Agent Hanson spins around, plants a kick smack in your solar plexus, and sends you flat on your back, sprawled over Zack’s bed.

You gasp for air, wondering what the hell just happened. Before you can process any of it, Agent Hanson is standing over you, pointing her gun at your crotch.

“Listen, you little fuck... If you even THINK of using your freaky Jedi mind tricks on me again, I will personally blow your nuts off and mail them to separate hemispheres. You understand what I’m saying?” To emphasize her point, Hanson grinds the barrel of her gun into your groin. You are still too short of breath to speak, but you nod your understanding.

Hanson glances at Zack, who is watching the exchange wide-eyed. “Any questions from you, pervert?” Zack shakes his head, but you hear him muttering under his breath, “That was SO hot!”

You get your breath back as Zack pulls on some clothes. What happened? For some reason, this woman not only was not susceptible to your powers, but she also knew what you were trying to do, even though you didn’t say a word. And how the fuck did she even know about any of this stuff anyway?

Zack finishes getting dressed. “I’m ready. Are you going to put us in handcuffs? If so, could you please use the ones under my bed? They have fur lining; I have sensitive skin.”

Hanson glares at your roommate, who wisely drops the question, and the two of you leave the room, with Hanson following closely behind.

“Behave yourselves and don’t make a scene,” she commands, as you approach the parking lot. Several students are in the vicinity, and no one pays any special attention to you. Hanson directs you toward a white, unmarked, windowless van. You have a bad feeling about this and wonder if she is really a government agent, after all. This may be your last chance to escape.

You have already had disasterous results from trying your powers on Hanson, and you are too fond of your testicles to let her carry through with her promise to separate them from the rest of you. Still, it might be worth the risk to try one more time to use your powers on her — maybe something a bit more subtle? Then again, you might try your powers on one of the nearby students. Of course, you could just make a run for it. Maybe she wouldn’t do anything if you were in a public place.