Stuck in the ceiling

All they could see were Lauren's butt and her feet dangling from the ceiling about 13 feet from the lower floor.

"Oh my god, are you alright?!" asked Morton, concerned about the well-being of his partner - and his most valuable asset at the channel.

Faint voices of Lauren were heard through the ceiling, but nothing comprehensible.

"Stay here and don't let her fall." Morton said to his team as he rushed up the stairs to the hole Lauren fell through. Eliza and Mark followed him.

"Well, at least the viewers will get what they want and we don't have to deal with her nastier half." remarked Frank to his partner, Bobby.

In the attic, Morton carefully crawled to the hole, making sure the boards could support his weight. The rest of the boards seemed sturdy enough. Lauren seemingly must have stood at a particularly rotten spot. "Are you alright?" he yelled down.

"What do you think, dummy?!" she snapped back angrily. "Gimme your hand! I'm slipping!"

Morton reached into the hole, and while he could see Lauren's head and arms, he was just unable to reach her. "Almost."

"Well, almost won't help me! Do something! I can't save your shitty show if I'm dead!"

"Can't we just wait till she falls down on her own?" asked Eliza. "It's not that high. We could put some pillows under her and wait it out."

Morton turned back to Mark. "You are a lot taller than me. You could probably reach her hand." he said while moving aside from the hole. "Hurry, before she falls."

Mark looked nervously at Eliza, as if for advice.

"Whatever, go!" said Eliza with a grimace.

Mark crawled there and reached into the hole. Lauren looked up and saw Mark's handsome face looking down at her. Even in the dim attic light, she could see his deep blue eyes staring into her as he was reaching for her arms. Like an angel from above. Fitting that he was actually saving her from her predicament.

"Gotcha!" he exclaimed when he managed to grab hold of Lauren's arms.

Lauren grabbed his arms. Sturdy, she assessed with a smile. He must be working out.

"Good." said Morton. "Can you pull her up?"

"Ugh. No." said Mark after a bit of struggling. "But I can hold her until you support her lower half."

"Good thinking." said Morton, and he and Eliza left for downstairs.

In the meanwhile, Bobby had made a little tower out of a table and some chairs he could find, while Frank was keeping the camera focused on Lauren's tight booty."The fans are gonna love this." he kept saying.

When Bobby saw Morton and Eliza returning, he expected bad news. "What happened? Is she still alive?"

"Of course she's alive. She is still kicking, you moron." said Frank. Though even dead, she would probably kick me if she could, he thought back to the 'good' old times.

"Mark keeps her from falling, but we have to free her from bellow." shared the plan Morton.

"Good. I built this, but I am too heavy to climb it." said Bobby.

All eyes turned to Eliza. Being a woman, she was by far the smallest of the group. And the lightest.

"What?" asked Eliza with a raised eyebrow.

"You have to climb it and help Lauren down." said Morton. "Please."

"Oh, come on. What if it falls?" tried to reason Eliza, looking at the hastily built 'tower'.

"We'll hold it with the boss." said Bobby, looking at Morton.

"If I get hurt while trying to help your silly little T.V. star, I'm gonna sue the channel." she reluctantly agreed.

Meanwhile in the attic - well actually inside the hole in the floor - Lauren finally got her little alone time with Mark.

"So, how long have you and Miss... Darling been together?" she asked, too casually considering she was stuck in the floor.

"Well..." Mark was a bit taken aback by the question. It was not the topic he would have expected from someone in such a dire situation. "6 months. We've been together for about 6 months now."

"Did she tell you she had a 'haunted' mansion or was it just another of her apparent secrets?" she groped.

"Well, it only came up recently."

"Thought so. Keeping secrets is not healthy in a relationship, you know. She should really feel ashamed of that. Especially after 6 months. Unbelievable."

"Well, I don't know about that, but this place really creeps her out. So I guess I understand why she hadn't brought it up sooner."

"Speaking of which, is there many things that 'creep' her out?"

"Why do you ask?"

"You wouldn't believe all the strange people I have met during my extensive career." said the barely 20-year-old young woman like she was Mother Teresa. "Believing in the supernatural can be the early stages of paranoia."

"I - I don't think that's the case with Liz."

"By the way, how's your private..." started Lauren before "Eeeek!"

"What?"

"Someone grabbed my ankle."

"Well, that's the idea. They will pull you down and I make sure you don't fall."

"Who is holding my ankle? If it's Frank, I swear to god I'm gonna kick him."

Meanwhile downstairs, Eliza managed to climb onto the pile of chairs, Bobby and Morton holding the makeshift tower from both sides. Frank couldn't help because of some supposed football injury in his back. Plus he wanted to get everything on tape.

"Ok, I think I can reach her." said Eliza while trying to grab one of Lauren's dangling feet. "Ouch, she kicked me! The hoe kicked me." she exclaimed. "I should just let her stay in the ceiling."

"I bet that's how goddesses are born." laughed Frank. "Nasty goddesses..."

"I'm sure she didn't mean to." said Morton. "You'll see how grateful she will be once you've helped her down."

"She better be..." grumbled Eliza. "But those shoes gotta go. She's not gonna kick me with those." and she pulled Lauren's shoes off her feet and threw them away. Then with small, careful tugs, Eliza started pulling on Lauren herself.

Meanwhile in the attic.

"Ugh. Someone took of my shoes. Which foot fetishist is playing with me? I bet it's Frank, that sicko." murmured Lauren. "I - I think I am moving down." she announced. Finally, she thought. I hope my clothes won't be too dirty from all this filth I am sliding through. My hair will surely be ruined, though. Oh, the sacrifices I am willing to make for this channel...

With another tug, Lauren moved further down into the hole. This time however, she felt the back of her jacket being caught on some boards. She wore her signature jacket over a button-up shirt, but the jacket was open to allow her to flaunt her generous bosom. That's how her fans liked it. With her arms up in the air, she hadn't expected her jacket to stay on her all the way down anyway. She would have one of the lackeys fish it out of the hole afterwards.

Then another tug and she went even lower, but this time she felt the front of her shirt caught on something as well.

"Uh-oh."

Another tug, and she felt her shirt moving further up her stomach. Panic struck Lauren. Her shirt was caught and she was being pulled out of it. She started struggling, trying to free her clothes from whatever they were stuck on. Of course she couldn't use her arms, as they were stuck above her head. Even if Mark had let go of them, she wouldn't be able to lower them.

Then another tug, and she could feel her entire shirt bunched up around her head. Along with her bra. She was essentially topless from neck down. Stuck in the ceiling, but still topless.

"Eeeek!" she screeched in terror, while kicking wildly. "Hold me! I'm falling. Don't let me fall." she held onto Mark's arms like dear life. She couldn't fall out of her top. That would make her topless. Totaly and utterly topless.

Mark didn't know what was going on, but she gripped Lauren's arms tighter. He was not about to drop their guest and embarrass his Lizzy. Though the brunette host was a good few inches lower than before, and holding onto her was proving increasingly more difficult.

Meanwhile downstairs, Eliza was struggling to pull Miss Perfect out of the ceiling. Dust and bits of rotten splinters flying everywhere in the process.

"I think she's stuck." she said, panting. "I tried. She's not moving."

"Those DDs must be keeping her up there." cackled Frank. "I think you just need to pull harder. The gravity-defiance of those babies is legendary."

"Ouch! She kicked me again!" winced Eliza. "That's it, bitch. You're coming down. NOW!" and she gave the next tug all her might.

Meawhile in the attic, Mark struggled to keep hold of Lauren's arms.

"You are slipping."

"Don't let me fall." pleaded Lauren with fear in her eyes. "Don't let me fall. Don't let me fall. Don't let me..." and suddenly the show host disappeared into the hole, leaving only her 'discarded' upper clothing in Mark's hands.