Ay, in the darkness there must come out the light

Ella tried to keep up as Nick guided her all across the Deep Blue Aquarium.

I… I never knew he had this side to him… is this even real?! Ella leaned against the wall to catch her breath. She just needed a break, just for a few minutes.

“Hey, are you okay?” Nick looked back at her with a worried expression on his face.

“Yeah, I… I’m fine,” Ella murmured, wiping the sweat from her brow. “I’m just a little exhausted, that’s all… running around this place all day is pretty strenuous, you know?”

She was feeling overwhelmed. Whereas Nick seemed more energized than she’d ever seen him before.

He had a sheepish expression on his face. “I’m sorry,” he apologized, scratching his head. “I guess I kind of overdid it a bit. It’s just, I love going to Deep Blue so much, you know? It’s one of my favorite places back on earth.”

“It’s okay,” Ella said, smiling back at him. “These things happen! And besides, I’m really having a lot of fun!”

Nick looked relieved to hear that. “Oh, good… I was worried that dragging you everywhere and carrying on about all kinds of fish would be really boring… nobody else seems to care about that stuff, you know, it’s like talking to air…”

Ella would be lying if she said that she actually enjoyed fish all that much. The truth was, the only reason she was having fun right now was because Nick seemed to be having fun. He was just so enthusiastic when he talked about all this stuff, it made her feel good that he was having such a good time.

I don’t really get what’s so exciting about fish, but I guess if he’s having fun?

At the same time Ella was presenting that outward-facing feeling towards Nick, she had failed to realize that Nick wasn’t an idiot, either.

He could tell that she was just humoring him. Even if she was having a good time, it wasn’t like she had actually recognized the beauty of the underwater world he was showing her. He appreciated that she was happy for his sake, but he didn’t want just that.

Nick wanted her to actually come away from this place with a really good memory or two.

“There’s something else I wanted to show you,” Nick said, checking the time. “A few things, actually. If you wouldn’t mind?”

“S-sure, of course!” Ella nodded. She followed him down the hallway, only to realize that they were approaching a deep slope in the floor. The lights were dim, but there was a strange glow around her as she walked further down the tunnel.

She only stopped when she bumped into Nick. For some reason, he had stopped walking, and had turned to face her.

“You should look up,” he said, holding back an amused smile. “It’s kind of a worthwhile sight, if you ask me.”

Ella blinked, then slowly raised her eyes.

She gasped.

“A-ah!”

For a second, she thought that she was underwater. There were fish everywhere she looked! Swimming to the left of her, and the right of her, and even over her head! Her eyes spun as she tried to take in everything, and she nearly fell over.

“Wh-what’s going on!?” She stammered, looking to Nick for clarification. “All these fish, they’re… what?! Huh?!”

Nick laughed. “It’s a bit overwhelming for your first time, huh?” He said, shaking his head. “Yeah, this is Deep Blue’s signature feature. The undersea tunnel! It’s a long corridor built through one of their tanks. People can observe the fish in their natural habitat from below, and see them in ways they’d never get to see them from the surface.”

“Wow… it really is cool…” Ella had never imagined anything like this before. She looked up in awe as a rainbow of fish swam past the glass, coming so close that if she squinted she could actually imagine that she herself was underwater with them.

“It’s like another world under the ocean,” Nick murmured. “The fish here are going about their lives, not knowing that we’re watching them. They don’t care. They just are. And we’re here, staring up into this world, while our feet are planted firmly on the ground.”

Ella gazed up into the shimmering water, so close that it almost felt like she could touch it. But when she reached out her fingers she found that the glass was much too far away for that.

Then she realized that Nick was giggling, and looking right at her. Her face heated up and she quickly pulled her hand back and looked down, feeling a little sheepish.

“It’s fine, there’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Nick assured her. “I’m just glad I found something that you actually liked!”

Ella’s eyes widened at the implication. “I-I liked other things too!” She said quickly. “I really liked, the, um, that one exhibit, with the dolphins!”

Nick laughed. “Everybody loves the dolphin exhibit,” he agreed. “It gets people in the door, that’s for sure. Too bad we couldn’t come here for one of the shows. But still, Ella, it’s fine. I can tell you’re just trying to have a good time for my sake.”

Ella’s hands trembled, and she was about to say that wasn’t true, when she stopped herself. Wait… that’s what I accused him of doing before… isn’t it?

Back in the cat café, she had all but accused Nick of just pretending to be having fun on their date to mollify her. And now it almost seemed like she was doing the same thing! But she wasn’t, right? No, she was definitely having fun. It just wasn’t exactly because she liked aquariums, that was all.

Oh wait… I think I get it, she realized, taking another look at Nick. Seeing someone talk about something they’re so passionate about, it makes me… yeah.

Her lip started to quiver, and she reached out to pinch Nick’s sleeve. He looked alarmed for a moment, then confused.

“Ella?”

“I’m sorry, I just…” Ella retracted her hand. “I’m… not like you.”

Nick wasn’t sure what to make of that. “Huh?”

She looked down at the dimly-lit floor. “Talking about fish, it seems like you really like them,” she said quietly. “You’re passionate about them. I feel like you’re having so much more fun than I’ve ever had… doing anything, really.”

Ella didn’t have anything that she enjoyed as much as Nick obviously enjoyed this place.

She raised her head to look him in the eye again.

“You said you wanted to take me here, because you really like this place, right? And the reason for our date is because you wanted to get to know me? But I feel like I’ve gotten to know you a lot better than you’ve gotten to know me… because there’s not really anything there. Nothing that excites me or gets me motivated… not like this.”

Nick nodded, his expression neutral.

“Well… you haven’t really had the chance,” he pointed out. “Given the life you’ve led up until this point… no, it’s not fair to even call that a life, is it?” He said, shaking his head. “You’ve just been stuck. So to not have anything you’re passionate about… believe me, I understand. Ella, have you ever heard of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs?”

Ella stared blankly at him, which was a pretty obvious sign that no she had not.

Which he kind of figured.

Nick sighed and scratched his head. “Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs is a psychology theory behind motivation, and why people behave the way they do,” he explained. “Maslow postulated that human needs were arranged in a hierarchy, like a pyramid. Before you could climb to the next level of the pyramid, you needed to make sure that all your needs below it were met, first.”

“What do you mean?” Ella questioned. “Needs, I don’t… huh?”

“The first level of the pyramid are basic survival needs.” That one was pretty easy to explain. “Things like food, water, and shelter. The basic things humans need to survive. Basically, Maslow said that unless you had everything necessary for survival, you wouldn’t even begin to contemplate needs that were higher than that. Then, moving on, the next level of the pyramid are things called safety needs. A feeling of security and order, as though you have control in your life. And I think… for you, that’s where your development stopped for a long time.”

It might be considered cruel to say something like that, and the way Ella bristled showed that she wasn’t thrilled to hear it.

But Nick hoped that if he talked through this stuff with her, it might help.

“I’m not saying it’s your fault, or that you did anything wrong,” he clarified. “It’s just that growing up the way you did, your safety needs were never really fulfilled, were they? Because of your stepfamily. And because of that, you never had the opportunity to try and explore the higher levels of motivation. Things like love and belonging, self-esteem, and self-actualization, all of that was out of reach to you because your basic need for safety and security wasn’t met.”

Startled, Ella’s eyes widened and her mouth fell open. That… that actually sounds RIGHT.

She couldn’t believe it, but something he was saying actually made sense!

“M-maybe… maybe you’re right, yeah,” she admitted, nodding softly. “Stuff like interests, hobbies, and passions, I haven’t… I haven’t been able to think about them, because… well, you know why, I don’t have to say it.”

She had an interest in stories and faerie tales. Dreams and adventures beyond human life. Those were the things she yearned for.

But right now, she was almost living one. She was in an underwater paradise with a boy who was trying to help her have a good time. And… she actually was enjoying herself, seeing him so passionate and happy. It made her heart do flipflops, seeing him smile.

She started to smile too.

“Nick… I feel so much better about all this,” she said, brushing her bangs aside and looking up at the fish swimming above her head. “Maybe you’re onto something there…”

“I hope so,” Nick agreed. “Because right now, you’re safe, Ella. You’re secure. You have some control in your life. You might not have fully internalized that yet, but you have the opportunity to make progress and be the person you want to be. You don’t have to keep living on just survival, you can thrive if you give yourself the chance. And I want to help you do that.”

Ella nodded. “I… I would like that,” she agreed.

She would need to make some big strides, though. And the first step would come from finding something she enjoyed… or having fun on this date.

“So is there anything else you wanted to show me about this place?” She asked curiously. “Or is this tunnel the big statement you use to seal the deal with the girls you bring to check out the fish here, huh?”

She laughed a little at her own joke, and Nick laughed with her.

“There’s actually something else I really like about Deep Blue,” he said, leading the way down the tunnel. “It’s after here.”

They stepped out of the tunnel, and Ella gasped. There was a whole other section of the aquarium they hadn’t been to before, and it was devoted to something that she never would have expected.

Deep sea life.

“What you saw up above, that was all the normal stuff they have at any old aquarium,” Nick explained. “At Deep Blue, they have a little more unique stuff when it comes to exhibits. They have fish from way deep down at the depths of the ocean!”

Ella looked around at some of the displays, and winced. “These… these fish are a little creepy, huh?” She murmured, keeping close to Nick and clinging to his shirt.

He looked at her in surprise. “Creepy? They’re cool! Look at that one, for example! It’s a viperfish! Doesn’t it look cool? Did you know, viperfish don’t have scales? They’re covered in a strange substance instead, that’s what gives their body a sheen to them!”

Ella grimaced as she looked at the display. It wasn’t a real viperfish, just a model of one, but looking at that sleek, shiny body and the rows of teeth in its grotesque mouth made her want to gag.

“…This… this isn’t a good date for me anymore,” she admitted honestly. Even though Nick was having fun, she definitely wasn’t.

Nick looked sad for a moment, but he understood. “It’s okay,” he said. “I totally understand that the fish down here can be really unnerving. But I just think it’s amazing. Some of the species at the bottom of the ocean, they’ve gone millennia without changing in any way. That’s just how perfectly they’ve adapted to their environment. You know, some people say that change is important, but then I take a look at these fish, and I realize, sometimes change isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.”

He scanned the room, looking at the different models and displays of fish, and the dark tanks of water that contained even more.

It really took his breath away.

“…I guess the reason I like this place so much, is because on some level, I wish I didn’t have to change either,” he admitted, looking sheepishly at Ella. “But for that reason exactly, I can see why you wouldn’t be that big of a fan.”

Ella nodded slowly. She appreciated what Nick was trying to say, she really did. At the same time, though, she just thought they were ugly and gross-looking.

“Aren’t there any cute ones?” She asked, hugging her arms and shivering.

Nick looked at her.

“That’s actually why I wanted to bring you here,” he said. “There’s one species they have, that you can only find way down here. But it’s worth all the creepy stuff, trust me!”

Ella looked cautiously at him. She doubted what he was saying, considering this room was completely empty, unlike the rooms above that were populated by tons of people. But maybe that was just an act on Dakota’s part, to give them some time to themselves.

And the look of passion in Nick’s eyes… oh, how could she say no?

She just couldn’t bring herself to do it. So even if she had a sinking suspicion that this wouldn’t go well, she decided to bite the bullet and go along with him.

Nick was overjoyed by her nod.

“I promise, Ella, you’re going to love this,” he swore. “Even if none of the other exhibits did anything for you, this one is going to be worth it!”

Ella nodded, hoping he was right.

She followed him through the dark rooms, like walking through a maze.

“Okay, here we are!” Nick said, leading Ella over to a dimly-lit tank in the corner of one of the rooms. “Take a look! What do you think?”

Ella leaned in and squinted, really hoping that some gross-faced sea monster wasn’t about to pop up and scare her. She didn’t think Nick would do something sadistic like that, but she was pretty on edge given that she felt like she was walking through a horror movie. Especially with Cinder pressing on the back of her mind like she was.

Then she gasped at what she saw.

“Oh my gosh… it’s so cute!” She squealed in delight.

Several tiny little… well, they could hardly be described as anything other than blobs!- sat at the bottom of the tank.

There must have been a dozen of them at least! Their bodies were soft and squishy, and colored in a variety of oranges, pinks, and light reds. They squirmed and throbbed, and looked up at Ella with tiny little dotted eyes as they undulated in the sand.

“What… what are these!?” Ella looked up at Nick in amazement. “They’re like aliens! I’ve never seen anything like them before!”

“They’re called flapjack octopuses,” Nick answered. “…Octopi? …Octopuses. They’re found off the coast of Japan. Their bodies are small, but very flexible and malleable.”

“They’re so cute,” Ella murmured, wishing she could reach out and pet the adorable little thing. “I wish I could keep one as a pet!”

“That would be nice, huh?” Nick laughed. “Unfortunately, because of the part of the ocean they live in, it’s not advisable. Even if they are rather small. It would take a lot of work.”

“Still…” Ella thought it would be cute to have one. “I’d like it.”

“So did it live up to your expectations?” Nick asked, feeling like with the current mood, he could afford to tease her just a little bit. “I know you said that all the things that live in the deep ocean were creepy and ugly, but-”

“I-I didn’t mean all!” Ella blushed. “You didn’t tell me that there were animals like this here, too! It’s cute!”

“Yeah. Did you know that the flapjack octopus doesn’t have any ink?” Nick pointed out. “Because of how deep it lives under the ocean, the ink would be worthless. Everything it would use it on is already adapted to dark environments. So it protects itself by flapping their fins and pulsing its body to release a jet of water. But they only do that when they sense danger. Otherwise, they’re content to just rest in the sand like this, safe and secure.”

“That’s really kind of cool, huh…” Ella murmured.

“It’s not really a predator, either,” Nick added. “Well, it does eat small worms and invertebrates that live on the ocean floor. But it doesn’t really hunt them. It uses the tiny suckers on its arms to stir up the sediment and eat that way. You’re not going to find it swimming around hunting other fish. They’re incredibly peaceful when left alone, but threaten them, and they get startled and try to flee as fast as they can!”

Ella looked at Nick as he talked all about the flapjack octopus, and she realized that maybe he was talking about a lot more than that.

“…You mean me?” She asked quietly. “Is that why you wanted to show me this, Nick?”

Nick flinched. Bullseye.

“…I thought you’d like it,” he admitted. “Because they did remind me a lot of you, Ella. You’re cute and adorable, after all. And no matter what you may think… I don’t believe you’re dangerous at all. I think you’re just quick to flee.”

Ella nodded slowly and turned back to the tank, getting another look at the mass of cephalopods. “Does the flapjack octopus have another side to it that’s really a vicious predator?”

Nick knew what she was doing. Deflecting back to Cinder to dwell on her faults.

“Nope,” he shook his head. “But I do know that just like you found yourself drawn to the flapjack octopus because of how cute they are, there are traits about you that other people can adore. And I found one of your best sides in the way you were here for me today.”

Ella blinked. “H-huh?!”

“It was sweet, tagging along with me today even though you didn’t really like the fish in the aquarium,” Nick said gently. “I didn’t mean to get so caught up in the aquarium for so long that I didn’t notice you weren’t having fun, but then I saw that you were having fun- because I was. Being able to like something for the sake of someone else, that’s a really positive thing there and I think it’s a great quality of yours, Ella. So maybe that’s something worth praising.”

Ella had never thought of it that way.

“…Yeah…” she murmured, looking at the flapjack octopus and smiling. “Yeah, maybe… maybe I am someone like that.”