Dum, dum, dum, honey what have you done?

“Look, guys, I really appreciate that you’re happy for me, really, I am,” Sylvia said, looking from one face to the next. She never would have imagined that people would actually be congratulating her (even if it was for something as simple as basic kindness) but this was more important, at least in her mind.

“But right now, I think Gina needs that support more than me.”

Nick was surprised to hear that coming from a girl who carried herself as such an egomaniac like Sylvia often did.

And he was also surprised that Gina, of all people, would need support. He turned to her, confused. While she’d started off in a shaky place, it felt like they’d really begun making progress together; she was cheerful, passionate, and seemed to be carrying herself with a lot more self-worth these days than she used to.

What did she need support with?

“Gina?” He approached her cautiously, and Gina took an instinctive step back, her eyes wide, like a deer being advanced on by a hunter.

Her nonchalant, lazy smirk returned immediately, but that moment of hesitation was enough for Nick to see what was really going on here.

He frowned.

“What’s the matter?” He asked. “Is everything okay?”

“Of course everything’s not okay,” she replied, flashing him a cheeky smile. “It feels like it’s been forever since I last got a taste of your semen, and I’ve been jonesing for it!”

She wiggled her eyebrows. “So, what do you say? You up for a little bit of fun?” She sidled up to him and licked her lips, running her fingers up the front of his trousers.

Normally, Nick would have been the kind of gullible sap who would have fallen for something like that pretty easily. But he could see the signs. Gina was wearing less eyeshadow than usual, and it was pretty smeared. Her eyes had a bit of puffiness to them, too. While knowing Gina, it could be because she got high, she didn’t reek of **** or booze for once.

And that look spoke for itself.

“I’m not gonna do that right now,” Nick said, gently taking her shoulders and separating her from him. He looked into her eyes with a serious expression. “Gina, this is serious. Is something the matter? I can tell you’ve been crying.”

In an instant, Gina went from seductive and flirtatious to antagonistic. Her face morphed into a glare and she pushed him away, taking a hostile stance.

“I’m fine!” She snapped. “What, so I’ve been crying? So fucking what? I can do whatever I want, you know!”

In spite of her screed, Nick could see the desperation in her watery eyes.

“Gina, everybody here cares for you!” Dawn said. “We’re just trying to help!”

“Oh, great, of course,” Gina scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Just what I need, a fucking intervention from the littlest kitten! Listen Dawny, I’m fine! Okay? I’m fine! I’m just… fine…”

Her voice broke, and she began to shake. Nick could tell she was about to have a breakdown, and for a moment, he didn’t see a hardened punk girl who’d burned through her life in a flash. He saw the old Gina, the sweet little crybaby, and he reached out and hugged her tight.

The display of affection was so foreign to her, she didn’t know what to do for a moment. Even after other girls had hugged her this morning, they weren’t like the hugs that Nick had given her back when she was little and needed some support.

This one was.

Maybe that was why she did something nobody ever expected her to do, and hugged him back. It would have been nice to get a point for doing that, but she’d done it so many times as a kid, that there was no way.

“I don’t know what to do!” She sobbed, trembling in his arms. “I want to be a good girl… but I don’t know what’s going to happen to me…”

“What do you mean?” Nick asked, focusing on just holding her as he tried to make sense of what she’d just said. “Gina?”

“It’s my transformation,” she sniveled, unable to hold it in anymore. Who the fuck cared if the other girls were around?! Gina didn’t give a damn. For the first time in forever, she found herself in Nick’s arms. And he wasn’t trying to screw her or treating her as a piece of meat. As much as she’d always loved that, it wasn’t what she needed from him right now.

What she needed from him was this.

Love. Care. The things that she’d always wanted, but had been too afraid to properly verbalize because she didn’t deserve them.

That realization was enough to get her to push him away.

“Stop it!” She snapped, stumbling backwards and nearly tripping over Dawn. She ignored the cat girl, and glared at Nick with wild eyes. “I’m- I’m not okay like this! You shouldn’t be hugging me!”

“Huh?” Nick stared at her in disbelief.

“I know what you’re doing!” Gina shouted, pointing a wild finger his way. “You’re fooling me! You’re only doing that because you know I’m turning into a good girl! Because I’m being good, and sweet, and nice, and caring!”

The other women looked around, confused by where Gina was coming from. What was she talking about? Nothing she said made any sense right now.

Nick was the most confused of all. “Huh?” He stared blankly at her. “You think that I only care about you because of your good girl transformation?”

Maybe he was wrong about Gina not seeming like she was on ****.

“It-it’s obvious!” She rambled, looking wildly at the sea of faces staring back at her. “You only want me for my body! And-and I’m fine with that! If you just want to fuck me, then do it! Fuck me!” She frantically started pulling at her jeans, trying to get them down over her curvy rear. “But don’t pretend you care! The only reason you’re being sweet is because-because I’m being a good girl now! Because I was nice to Sylvia and tried to help her! Because I learned to cook! You’re only treating me this way because I’m doing what you want me to, and being good! I know it! So… so just stop, okay!?”

The tears kept coming. What remained of Gina’s mascara rolled down her face and she started to shake. At this point, Nick didn’t know what to expect. This side of Gina was something that he had only seen glimpses of- never to this extent before.

Whatever crazy bullshit she’d made up in her mind, it was clear that her thoughts weren’t based in reality.

Nick stepped forward and pulled her into another hug. This time, she fought him off from the start.

“Stop it! Just stop it! Stop comforting me!” She swatted at him with her nails. “I don’t deserve it! I don’t WANT to deserve it, alright!? Stop trying to change me! Stop making me want it! I don’t! Just let me be a piece of shit you fucking bitch!”

Nick felt her nails gouge into his face, and he saw her eyes widen in realization. “A-ah…” She took a step back, and immediately any sign of anger fled her expression, and was quickly replaced by horror.

“I-I didn’t mean to…” She choked out as Nick reached up and felt the sticky warmth of blood on his cheek. He was actually surprised she’d scratched him. It wasn’t deep, but it still stung.

Not as much as the traumatized expression on Gina’s face stung, though.

“Gina?”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” She immediately broke out into cries of despair and the strength left her legs. She crouched down, holding her head in shame. “I didn’t mean it! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

“What’s the matter?” Dawn knelt beside Gina and patted her on the back as the other girls broke out of their trance and crowded around her as well. Everyone was worried by the sudden and severe breakdown coming from the trembling woman.

But no one was more worried than Nick.

“Gina…” He approached her with a worried expression, and crouched down next to her.

“I’m sorry…” Gina wiped away her tears, shaking like a fragile leaf clinging to a branch for dear life. Nick was that branch, and she’d just struck him!

“Gina, I’m not mad,” he said gently. “I’m worried about you.”

“Well, you should be mad!” Gina spat. “So stop! Stop being so nice! I’m a bad girl, you got that!? You’re supposed to treat me like just some hole to plow! These fucking transformations, fucking stop it!”

“You can’t stop it,” Sylvia said quietly. “They’re going to change you. You have to have realized that by this point.”

Gina raised her head and glared at Sylvia with an expression that was an odd mixture of contempt and sympathy. “…I hate it,” she whimpered. “I don’t want to be that person. I don’t want to change like this! I just… I just want… I just want to be a bad girl!”

“Are you following any of this?” Kim asked, completely confused by what was happening. Carly and Marley both shook their heads. No one seemed to fully understand where Gina was coming from, or why she was so **** to reject any form of care from Nick like this.

Maybe that was why nobody had been able to notice the steps of her breakdown until now.

“…I think I understand,” Dani said quietly, reaching down and wiping her tears. She actually let her, which was a good sign.

Gina stared pathetically up at Dani. “You understand?” She spat, hanging her head. “What the fuck do you ‘understand’ huh?”

“You’re punishing yourself,” Dani replied. “I know a bit about that myself.”

Gina blinked. Then she immediately turned hostile. “You have no fucking idea, you piece of-”

“That’s enough!” Dani snapped, glaring at her. “I’m not going to just let you push me around like Nick, you got that?” She grabbed Gina’s coat and gave her a shake. “Now listen here! What you’re doing? It’s fucking bullshit, and I know it all too well!”

She released Gina, and the punk girl fell to the floor. She didn’t even bother sitting up, her face burning with guilt and shame.

Dani straightened up and turned to the others.

“It’s self-loathing,” she said, her voice aching with bitter sympathy. “…I’ve been there myself. She’s angry at herself. And because she hates herself, she doesn’t want you to treat her with kindness, or sympathy. She doesn’t want to be a good girl, because a good girl would act in a way that deserves those things, isn’t the right?”

“Shut up,” Gina muttered, unable to face Dani’s piercing stare.

“You don’t just hate the idea of being a good girl because of what you’d have to do, right?” Dani pressed. “It’s because your transformation is turning you into someone who doesn’t deserve to be punished. Scorned. Hated. Because you’re turning into a good girl! But you can’t accept that. You WANT to beat yourself up, you’re forcing your life to fall apart, out of guilt! Even after everything that’s happened.”

Gina didn’t say anything. She just glared.

“I think I get it,” Sylvia realized. A surprising display of understanding from her. “Gina was filled with self-loathing at the start.”

“But… I thought we were working on that…” Nick said quietly, turning towards Gina. He felt betrayed by this sudden shift in her. “Gina, why didn’t you say anything?”

Gina raised her head to look at him, and she tried to hate him, she really did. But she just looked sad and hurt. “Would it matter?” She mumbled softly. “Would it really matter, if I said anything? That’s not what I want, don’t you get it?! I don’t want to be a good girl! I don’t want you to help me! I just… I just want to stop being me!”

As much as that hurt to hear, Nick thought they were finally getting somewhere.

Gina slumped back on her hands and laughed. “You really thought I changed?” She muttered, shaking her head. “That a few hugs and some gentle sex would make up for all the terrible things I’ve done? To my parents… to my friends… to the people here?”

She turned and looked pointedly at Dani, then at Sylvia.

“…To Dakota?”

And that’s when Nick realized what had really kicked this off.

“Oh my god, Gina…” He crouched down and hugged her again, practically lying on top of her. Right now, Gina needed support more than anything else, and he needed to give it to her. He was terrified by the thought of what could happen if she wasn’t given love right now.

“What? I don’t get it,” Rose said, looking around in confusion. “What happened?”

“It’s all my fault…” Gina whimpered, crying into Nick’s shoulder. “All my fault! Everything… all of this-! It’s all because of me! If I… If I hadn’t killed her… then she wouldn’t have become a ghost! She wouldn’t have ruined your life… she wouldn’t have become a host… all that, all of it… everything that’s happened to us, happened to you… it’s all my fault!”

Finally, Gina wasn’t trying to be tough or nonchalant. She wasn’t trying to hide her pain behind “whatever the fuck you want” or some other nihilistic aphorism.

She just let Nick hold her as she emptied her heart out onto everyone, preparing to be judged for the sins she’d committed.

“Oh my… I… I didn’t even think of it like that…” Mary gasped, holding her hand over her mouth.

“I didn’t pick up on it either,” Dawn muttered, feeling like the biggest fool in the world.

But nobody felt worse than Nick in that moment.

He was closer to Gina than any of them. He knew what Gina would have been going through, and how terrible it must have been for her, to learn everything about what had happened to Dakota, all the horrible things Dakota had done… and for her to believe it was all her fault.

No wonder she felt like she deserved nothing but punishment, to be used as a hole.

Maybe if Nick was in her position, he would feel the same.

“But that’s bullshit!” Kim blurted out, startling everyone.

“Kim!” Rose gasped, scandalized.

“I’m sorry, but it is!” Kim exclaimed. “You can’t blame yourself for what Dakota did! That doesn’t make sense! And it’s not fair, either!”

“You’re the one who doesn’t get it!” Gina seethed. “It’s because of me! If I hadn’t kissed Nick, Dakota never would have run out to that river! She never would have drowned, and Nick’s life wouldn’t have ruined, and none of you would ever have been brought here!”

That was the guilt that had been weighing Gina down all round. While Dakota had explained in great detail just how awful the deeds she’d done had been, all through that time Gina was left to consider just who was at fault for all of it.

And the only person that she could blame was herself.

“I-I don’t know if there’s anything we can do,” Rose mumbled. “There’s gotta be something, right?”

But unfortunately, Rose’s ideal of Nick’s wife wasn’t a woman who could magically fix every problem. There wasn’t anything she could do to dry Nick’s tears.

Then Sylvia opened her mouth.

“You’re right. It WAS your fault.”

Gina’s eyes widened and she started to shake, her worst fears confirmed.

Nick was enraged. “Sylvia!” He roared, glaring up at her. “What the fuck did you just say!?”

“Sylvia!” Mary couldn’t believe her ears. All the good will Sylvia had built up in the last few hours had completely evaporated, and Dani was doing a good job of trying not to hit her.

But Sylvia stood her ground.

“Well, sorry, but it’s the truth. It’s your fault! If that’s how you feel, I’m not going to discourage it! And that’s why I need to say thanks!”

That was so out of left field, Gina didn’t even know how to respond for a second. Nobody did.

A collective “…Huh?” went around the Banquet Hall.

“Yeah, you killed Dakota, and that sucks! Sure, feel bad for it!” Sylvia declared. “But hey! If Dakota didn’t die? I wouldn’t even exist right now! So again, thanks for letting me be created!”

That was when the pieces started to fall into place.

Gina still looked shaken, though.

“I-I guess that makes sense?” Dawn scrunched up her face in contemplation. “If Dakota never became a host, then Sylvia never would have been born…”

“Wow, you’re right…” Mary nodded.

“Of course I’m right!” Sylvia crossed her arms over her chest and sniffed. “Things were really bad, no denying that, and there were some big problems, too! But… I’m where I am now because Dakota died. So if you want to blame yourself and hate yourself for that, then you should at least be happy you helped me, right? And it’s not just me!”

She turned and looked pointedly at Marley.

“Marley… she never would have been born, either.”

Another true statement. Without Dakota, there wouldn’t be Mimi, who wouldn’t have been able to turn into Marley.

“I-I guess?” Marley scratched her cheek thoughtfully.

“I’m not gonna say it’s good that we’re all here,” Sylvia said. “Even though I don’t have an issue with any of this… it’s clear you all don’t like being on this show. But think about the good that’s occurred because of it! Dani and Carly, you two are happy together, right?”

The two women looked at each other, feeling a little awkward about this whole thing, in spite of their feelings.

“And Dawn would still be a lonely cat lady!”

“Hey!” Dawn scowled.

“Morgana would still be a loser locked in her room, instead of a really hot goth with a major crush on a guy she’s been fantasizing for years!”

Morgana turned red. She was in the same room as Nick for the first time since they had been together, and it had left her so paralyzed she could barely speak.

“Um… who else… oh! Rose and Mary, they found love because of this show, in fact, a lot of girls have!” Sylvia was on a roll now! “Mary got married! And Rose… Rose is incredibly happy, she’s finally found someone she’s in love with. Also, she got a bunch of money for her brother, too, and, um…”

Sylvia’s eyes landed on Kim.

“Kim… has short hair now. And that’s everyone, yup.”

Kim snorted in exasperation and rolled her eyes. “Okay, that’s a little…”

“Well, I’m trying here!” Sylvia huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. “…Right! Holly! Holly’s a sex **** now, and Gina, you’ve gotta be pro-sex ****, right!?”

Nick was pretty sure this conversation was going off the rails. He sighed.

“Sylvia, I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but-”

“Don’t feel bad, is my point!” Sylvia exclaimed, grabbing Gina and trying to shake some sense into her. “If you’re upset that you ruined Daddy’s life? Well, he’s living the life of his dreams, thanks to this show!”

“I… I don’t…” Gina shook her head, trying to process everything that had been dropped into her lap. She was really struggling with it, though.

“Look, Gina,” Nick murmured, hugging her again. “If you ask me, you’ve got nothing to feel bad about. You didn’t do anything wrong. That day… that was a tragic accident. None of it was your fault. You’re not to blame for Dakota running out onto that river. You’re not to blame for her drowning. And I know you might not believe that… but nobody blames you for that. Not even Dakota.”

Nick knew that was the truth. Because it had to be. If, after all this time, Dakota really did hold Gina responsible…

That might have been what it took for him to finally stop making excuses for her, and see her as a monster.

He didn’t want to think about that.

“It’s not your fault,” he said again, holding her close. “And if you can’t accept that… then at least, try and see things from Sylvia’s perspective. And try to focus on some of the good that happened, too, if you can.”

Gina was overwhelmed with emotion. She couldn’t hold it in anymore, and burst into tears, hugging Nick tightly as all the pain and guilt started flowing out of her.