The vacancy that sat in my heart, is a space that now you hold

At 6:00, everyone turned in for the night. Now that Dakota was strictly enforcing a curfew (at least for today) there wasn’t really anything else that could be done.

There was quite a bit of tension in the air, given that a certain pair of roommates would have to be taken up the elevator without being untied, and then left to their own devices. Fortunately for Dani, the two women were surprisingly compliant. As if they knew that resisting the tomboy with superhuman strength was a bad idea.

Dawn didn’t even try to seduce her this time.

“I still think I should have been the one to handle it,” Holly sighed as the girls returned to their individual rooms. “Dawn and Morgana might be able to make me aroused, but the only thing that can get my motor running is thoughts about Nick. They wouldn’t be able to get me distracted with their wiles and skills, and plus!”

She rapped her knuckles against the chastity belt beneath her skirt.

“…Just saying,” she shrugged.

Mary blushed slightly and Dani rolled her eyes. Kim stifled a giggle.

“That wouldn’t work,” Carly said, shaking her head. She wasn’t used to being the voice of reason in the group. “Keep in mind, you’re what, not even five feet? Do you really think you’d be able to carry one of those two?”

“Hey! I’m taller than that, at least!” Holly scowled. “…But I get your point.”

Dani was able to carry both of them slung over her arms like sacks of potatoes, with hardly any effort. If she’d been a guy, Carly might have gotten turned on by the manly display.

But that was another matter entirely.

“You think they’re going to be okay?” Gina asked worriedly, glancing longingly at the door. Even now, part of her wanted to rush in and serve her mistress however she could.

The unspoken question on the former punk’s lips was asking whether or not she would be okay, as well- after all, she’d been transformed by the mirrors too.

“They might tear each other apart, but if Dakota’s instituting a curfew, that’s about the worst of it,” Sylvia judged, leaning against the elevator door. “Remember, what she wants most is for Daddy to be happy. His women hurting each other isn’t part of that. You know, unless it’s in a sexy way. And that’s not really a problem that needs fixing…”

“Mom…” Marley’s voice held a warning tone to it, even though she wasn’t upset with her mother. She was just cautioning the other woman.

Sylvia held up her hands in surrender.

“Look, all I’m saying is that those two are going to make each other really horny, and that’s about all we can do about it,” she stated. “Just quarantine them until the transformation wears off. Which should be any minute now.”

She glanced at the door herself. “…Here’s hoping they can’t do that much damage before that happens, anyway…”

As for the rest of them, the girls had to return to their rooms as well. It was after six, and Dakota would only give so much time for a grace period.

Mary graciously escorted Gina to their shared bedroom, while an exhausted Dani and Kim headed back to theirs.

That just left Sylvia, standing in the hallway looking hopefully over at Carly and Marley. Marley looked eager, while Carly looked tired. But both twins left the door open. Sylvia turned to go… and then she saw Holly.

The ponytailed girl stood awkwardly in the middle of the hallway, rocking on her heels and drumming her fingers against the wall. When their eyes met, she glanced away.

“You should probably get back to the Master’s Suite too, yeah?” Sylvia said.

Holly nodded thoughtfully.

“Yeah… guess so.”

She didn’t move for the elevator, though.

“What’s the matter?” Sylvia asked, frowning. She could sense that something was wrong, but she didn’t know enough about what it meant to be human yet to try and figure it out on her own.

Sometimes, simple was best, and all you had to do was ask!

“It’s… pretty lonely up there,” Holly said quietly.

Sylvia blinked. That hadn’t been the statement she’d been expecting.

“Lonely?”

“Yeah, lonely,” Holly said, her tone a strange mix of hurt defensiveness and sadness. “Nick isn’t there, you know? He usually is… but without him, well…”

Sylvia paused. That was right. Nick spent nearly every night in the Master’s Suite- that was one of the game’s rules. And Holly was happy to keep him company, recharged by just his presence, even if he would never touch her, and scarcely ever even looked her way.

But right now, he was with Rose, off doing who knows what. Which meant Holly would be left all alone tonight.

“Hey, it’s not that big of a deal!” Holly smiled cheerfully. “Last time, when Dawn got her private date with him, I was just fine!”

“You crashed with someone else that night, though,” Sylvia remembered. She hadn’t thought anything of it at the time, but now that Holly was making her consider what the transformations had done to her attachments to Nick…

Holly just gave an awkward shrug.

That made Sylvia feel even worse. She didn’t like feeling this way. What? Was this guilt? Why would she be feeling guilty!? It wasn’t like SHE’D done anything! Mary could have invited her back to her bedroom with Gina, but she didn’t! This wasn’t Sylvia’s responsibility, and it wasn’t something that she should feel bad about!

Maybe she was just tired or hungry. That was probably it, right?

“Excuse me!” Dakota’s amused voice crackled through the air, as she spoke through an intercom that didn’t exist. Sylvia and Holly both jumped. “Will the Auditionees who would not like to be eliminated from the harem please report to their assigned domicile? Failure to comply will result in expulsion and potential immediate cessation of existence.”

Sylvia turned pale. The murky feeling in her stomach was replaced by something a whole hell of a lot stronger.

“You, uh, you should probably get going,” Holly said awkwardly. “Dakota sounds like she means business…”

Sylvia and Holly both knew better than to take Dakota’s threats with a grain of salt. Even though they both doubted Dakota would ACTUALLY eliminate Sylvia like this, without Nick’s consent, it was better to be safe than sorry, right?

“…Yeah,” Sylvia nodded, turning and heading for the door to the Blue Room of the Eastern Dragon, where Carly and Marley stayed.

She stopped at the entrance.

“…Hey, wait,” she said, turning to look over her shoulder. “Would you like to come join us?”

Holly blinked, taken aback by the offer. “Really? I mean, you’re actually asking?”

Sylvia offered an awkward shrug in response. “I mean, why not?” She asked. “It’s not like you have anything better to do tonight, right? And I’m guessing you don’t want to be alone.”

Sylvia knew what it was like to be all by yourself, stuck in a room while everyone else got to have fun. And even though she didn’t plan on having any fun tonight (unless sleep counted, of course) she felt sympathetic for Holly.

She was capable of being kind to others. She was even capable of empathy! Perhaps she wasn’t a total lost cause just yet.

“Well, okay, I guess so,” Holly nodded, walking over to the blonde with a spring in her step. “Who knows? It might even be fun!”

Marley was thrilled when Sylvia walked in through the door. Carly was smiling too by this point.

“Hey, Sylvia, we were just… wait, Holly?” Carly stared at the short girl and rubbed her eyes for a second to make sure she wasn’t seeing things. “You invited Holly?”

“Is… is that bad?” Sylvia asked warily.

“No, of course not!” Carly said, her face brightening. “The more the merrier, that’s what I always say! Right, sis?”

Marley’s smile had dimmed slightly. “…Right,” she said.

“Marley, you’re okay with this, right?” Sylvia wasn’t the best when it came to understanding the feelings of others, but Marley was the exception. Even she could see that her transformed slime daughter wasn’t thrilled about this.

“Okay, so, I’m actually really happy,” Marley admitted, glancing at Holly. Her expression didn’t show that, though. “I mean, about you extending the offer. I think that’s really good, mom, I do. …Unless you did it for some sort of ‘I’m going to make use of the sex **** because Daddy’s not here to do it’ kind of reasoning, right?”

She eyed Sylvia suspiciously.

“What?! No, of course not,” Sylvia said, shaking her head. “I just felt bad, since she’d have to be spending the entire night in the Master’s Suite all by herself!”

“Hey, that’s really something!” Carly whistled, cracking a grin. “Good on you, being sweet like that to someone else. I didn’t see that one coming.”

Sylvia ignored the dig and just smiled proudly. “I know!” She said, placing her hands on her hips. “I really did my best to do the right thing!”

Baby steps, Marley reminded herself. Baby steps.

“Still, though… you know that this bed wasn’t made for four people, right?” Marley pointed out, gesturing towards the blue sheets. “Three is already an inconvenience, but then you went and brought in another one?”

Ah. She raised a valid point. Sylvia hadn’t had a lot of experience as an Auditionee at this point yet, so she wasn’t fully cognizant of all the problems with such a sleeping arrangement.

“It’s not like Holly takes up much space, though,” Carly pointed out with a grin. “Come on, sis, it’ll be fine. It’s more fun this way!”

She socked her sister playfully on the shoulder and Marley rolled her eyes. She hated the dynamic of “Carly is the fun one who lets people do anything, and Marley is the buzzkill”.

“I’m fine with sleeping on the floor!” Holly chirped, flashing a toothy smile.

“…No that sounds even worse,” Marley said, shaking her head. She didn’t want to let something like that happen, either.

“Marley, you can think about it this way!” Sylvia took her daughter by the hands and offered her a hopeful grin. “We all get to be together on the bed, packed in close and cuddling. …You do still like cuddles, right?”

Well, when Sylvia put it like that, Marley could see the positives.

“…Okay, I can work with this,” Marley said, hardly even putting up a fight.

“Really? I can sleep on the bed?” Holly was amazed. She hadn’t expected to be on the receiving end of such good fortune.

“Sure, it’ll be fun!” Carly chortled. “Crammed in like sardines.”

Sylvia let out a relieved sigh. “I’m glad that tonight is my night with you two,” she said, looking from Marley to Carly, and then back to her daughter again. “After last night…”

“What… was Dani a lot of trouble?” Carly winced. “I’m sorry about her… she’s pretty stubborn-headed, and after all the stuff you did, well… you can’t really blame her for holding it against you.”

This was dangerous territory to tread on, Sylvia knew that all too well. Carly was still on Dani’s side in a lot of ways.

But Sylvia was fine with that. After all, she had her own thoughts on the matter regardless. And it wasn’t like they were completely wrong to blame Sylvia for everything that happened, either.

“It actually wasn’t that bad,” Sylvia admitted. “We got in a fight, sure, but I think it could have gone a lot worse.”

“Any fight with Dani you walk away from is probably a good one,” Holly joked.

Sylvia glanced at her. She was kidding, but she didn’t know how close Sylvia had gotten to having to deal with those exact problems.

“…I just wish there was something I could do to make it better,” the blonde sighed, sitting down on the bed. “I hate having everyone dislike me. When I was the host, that was one thing, it just came with the territory. But I’m not the host now! I’m just trying my best to get along with everyone!”

Carly sighed. She walked over and placed her hand on Sylvia’s shoulder.

“It’s not that simple, and you know it,” she said softly. “Look, my transformations are one thing. You didn’t give me any that I have an issue with. In fact…”

She looked up at Marley, who had an uncomfortable expression on her face. When the twins’ eyes met, they both smiled.

“…You gave me something very important,” Carly said, patting her hand. “But that’s not the case for a lot of people. You get that, right? For a lot of us, you’ve stripped away parts of our identities, and completely warped our bodies and our sense of reason.”

“But I’m not doing that anymore,” Sylvia reminded her. “I’m just a regular person now!”

“…That’s not how this works, mom,” Marley said, sitting on the opposite side of her. Both twins were comforting Sylvia now. “Just because you’re not the host anymore, that doesn’t mean everybody is going to forgive and forget all the stuff you did when you WERE the host.”

“…I know,” Sylvia said, shaking her head. In spite of what she’d said before, on a fundamental level she knew the girls were right on the money. “So what do you guys think I should do? How should I make this right, so we can all get along?”

“I said it before, but my transformation doesn’t help with that,” Carly said gently. “But I think the best way to start it by thinking about it in different terms. Why do you want to apologize to them?”

“I just said,” Sylvia replied, staring at Carly like she was stupid. “So we can all get along!”

Marley groaned and nursed her temples. Carly shook her head sadly.

“It doesn’t work like that,” she said. “Apologizing just so everyone can be happy isn’t really apologizing. It’s more like you’re trying to sweep things under the rug. And take it from the expert at repressing and running away from your problems, that doesn’t help.”

“No one wants an insincere apology,” Marley said gently. “Apologizing isn’t supposed to be about you, mom. It’s about the person you hurt. Trying to make things right, and help them feel better about what happened.”

“Right, yes, that’s what I want!” Sylvia nodded. “I want them to feel better!”

“But you want them to feel better for your sake,” Carly corrected. “Not for theirs.”

Sylvia stared at her, not quite sure she understood the difference.

Marley sighed again, and then stood up. She took Sylvia by the hands and helped her mother to her feet. Then she turned to Holly.

“Like with Holly, think about it like that,” she said, turning Sylvia to look directly at the shorter girl. “Why did you ask her to come to our room tonight?”

“Because I felt bad,” Sylvia answered immediately. “She was all alone, and I thought she’d get lonely if she didn’t have someone to spend the night with. I felt all weird and icky about it, so I asked her if she’d like to come.”

“There, see?” Carly said triumphantly. “A perfect example of empathy! You were able to notice how she was feeling, and offered her something to make her feel better! Not because you would gain something out of it, but just because you felt bad! That’s what apologizing is!”

“That’s it?” Sylvia asked, confused. “That’s apologizing?”

“Well… sort of,” Carly said, glancing at her twin. “Look, Marley and me-”

Holly snorted, earning her a look from Carly.

“…We used to fight all the time when we were kids,” Carly pressed on, remembering the implanted memories of sibling spats that had been placed in her head. “Sometimes we’d go for days or even weeks without speaking to one another because we were so mad.”

“But we loved each other, too,” Marley said, walking over to her twin and taking her hand. “So we were always able to apologize, eventually, and make things up to one another.”

“I see…” Sylvia said that, and nodded, but she didn’t really get it.

“Apologizing is about helping fix the other person,” Carly explained. “If you feel bad about what you did to Dani, then apologize to her. Not because you’re trying to make things better between the two of you, but because you genuinely feel bad about what you did, and you want to make amends somehow.”

The unspoken part of that statement was that apologizing wasn’t enough- Sylvia had to genuinely care about Dani’s feelings, and feel properly bad about what she did.

Even Sylvia knew that much.

Which is why she felt that murkiness come back, making it impossible to meet the other girls’ eyes. She looked away.

“…I’m sorry,” she murmured, shaking her head. “I wish I could, but… in my heart, I still think the way I did back then, when I first gave those transformations. I thought that Dani would be better if those things happened, and… I still feel that way, even now. Even though I should know that’s wrong, even though she’s told me why that’s wrong… I just can’t bring myself to feel the same.”

Sylvia knew that probably made her a bad person. But she just couldn’t help herself. She’d put a lot of effort into designing those transformations for Dani, and she truly believed that they were the key to making both her and Nick happy.

It would be rough going, getting there, but in Sylvia’s eyes it was worth it.

Carly bit her lip and sighed.

“It looks like we have a long way to go, then,” she said gently, sitting back down on the bed.

“I’m sorry,” Sylvia apologized automatically. “I’m sorry that… I can’t say ‘I’m sorry’ I guess. And actually mean it.”

“It’s okay, mom,” Marley said, placing her hand on Sylvia’s shoulder. “I’m sure you’ll get there someday. You’ll figure out how much you’ve hurt Dani and the others. And you’ll honestly feel bad about it.”

Sylvia frowned. She didn’t like feeling bad. She didn’t want to feel bad. Half the reason she wanted to apologize was so that she could stop feeling all those murky feelings that came with the rejection from the other girls!

But she had to trust that Marley wanted what was best for her. So she nodded.

“Thanks, I’ll try,” she said, even though she wasn’t sure what exactly she should be trying.

Marley smiled a little. That was nice to hear. Baby steps, she reminded herself again.

Holly cleared her throat.

“Okay, this is nice and all, a great family bonding moment for sure, but… we do still need to work out these sleeping arrangements, right?”

Carly nodded. The short girl raised a good point.

At least the others are probably more comfortable preparing for bed than we are since they only have two people to a room, she thought, yawning.