Package Delivered

"Sign here," the delivery man in the brown uniform indicated a line on a worn digital pad. You comply, holding the stylus in your right hand, wondering how many other hands touch the implement between cleansings.

"Last name?" he asks as you hand the pad back, which you answer, and are rewarded by being handed a small cardboard box, a perfect cube, about six inches on each side.

Shutting and locking the door behind you, you examine the package. Your name is written in block letters as the recipient, but there is no return address. You think back to your recent online browsing and try to remember if you had ordered anything, but nothing comes to mind. With no sense of urgency, you stop in the kitchen to grab a snack, placing the box on the counter as you shuffle through the pantry in search of something salty.

"What's in the box?" your older sister Rose's voice sounds from the table.

"Dunno," you reply, reaching for a bag of Doritos, "it just came. I don't remember ordering anything, though. Maybe I won a contest!"

"Yeah, right," your sister laughs, "You're just about the unluckiest person I know."

"You're probably right," you sigh dramatically, placing the bag of chips on the table, then turning to grab the box, "but there's only one way to find out!"

Holding the small box in one hand, you pull a steak knife from the knife block on the counter with the other and carefully cut the top open. The dry sound of cardboard cutting fills the room as your sister watches curiously through her green eyes to see the resolution to the mystery. The box cut, you place the knife down, make a "tada!" sound, and open it.

At first nothing happened. It seemed that the box is completely empty. Then, in an explosion of glitter, a tiny woman with the wings of a dragonfly flies out of the box and landed on the table between yourself and your sister. You blink and take in the impossible image in. She is minuscule, maybe four inches high, but is extremely top-heavy. In fact, her breasts are so big, that had you not seen her flying a moment earlier, you would have questioned her aerodynamics. Her miniature face had puffy red lips and blue eye shadow. One of her hands was on her hip, while the other held a tiny wand.

She also was completely stark naked.

"What in the world?!" Rose shrieks.

That's when you remember what you typed into your laptop...