On a spectrum of “Sterile” to “hyperfertile,” how likely is sex with your fantasy partner likely to result in pregnancy?

On a spectrum of “Sterile” to “hyperfertile,” how likely is sex with your fantasy partner likely to result in pregnancy?

***

“Ok, so, Tori does marketing.” Danielle, one of Kai’s friends slurred, Kai having to hold her up onto the stool she was sitting at. It was hard to really hear her over the sound of someone belting I Wanna Dance with Somebody from the little stage on the far side of the bar.

“Marketing executive.” Charlie corrected. He always did that, knowing how proud I was to have made it to the position.

“So what do you do, Charlie?” Danielle giggled, pulling up her dress to better cover her boobs. It wasn’t slutty by any means, but it was very sexy and I tried to ignore her obvious attempts to flirt with me.

I sipped my water. Charlie reminded me twelve times not to drink while we were on the pills, so I stuck with water. Unlike Danielle, who was gulping down margaritas. According to the looks of Kai, Frankie, Gina, and Jane, this was typical for Danielle.

“Before the move, I taught High School Theater and English.” He answered, shooting me a quick glance. He was waiting for my usual remark. ’Guess who picks up the check?’

“He’s really good, too.” I said, nodding. “The school threw a big party for him and everything when he left. Lot of crying kids.” I hadn’t ever really kept up with Charlie’s teaching. It had always been like a little pet project that kept him busy while I was gone. Figured it couldn’t have been all that hard given how clingy he was at home.

I didn’t start giving a fuck about what was happening with his work until a woman from my office started volunteering at the school. She seemed to have a thing for Charlie, and, well… Charlie didn’t teach anymore. I didn’t attend the going away party, but I did see the boxes of cards he brought home.

Charlie blushed, getting a little bashful, which made me feel much better than when I’d make him look ashamed. He waved his hands, sipping his water. “Good had nothing to do with it. Most kids just need to be given a square deal and some consistency.” Jane, who was, herself a high school math teacher seemed to perk up at this.

“Why’d you give it up? ‘Cuz of the move?” Jane asked, pushing her thick rimmed glasses up her button nose.

Because his cheating whore wife got jealous some other woman was helping him raise funds for lunches. “I wanted to prioritize my marriage and Tori’s career.” He said. An expertly diplomatic phrasing.

“Well, I happen to know an English position is gonna be opening up at my school at the end of this semester.” Jane had seemed nice enough, if a bit quiet. She, like me, wasn’t singing tonight. The only person who’d said less than her was Kai’s boyfriend, Frankie, who was adamant that he didn’t like karaoke. “If you’re interested.”

“Thanks. I’ll consider it.”

I reached over and squeezed his elbow, encouraging him silently. He used to love teaching. Of all the things he could resent me for, forcing him to torch his career was definitely up there.

“Or you could come be a dancer where I work.” Gina said, eliciting a laugh from everyone. She worked at a “breastaraunt” as a bottle girl. The club was apparently, according to Gina, extremely **** for staff. “Or at least sign up for my burlesque workshop.” Gina stirred her cocktail with a straw, wincing as the drunk singer attempted too loudly to reach a high note. The speakers could only replicate the sound as a tinny shriek that pained the ears and elicited boos from the audience.

“Now there’s an idea.” Charlie flashed me a quick smile, which I returned. He pulled out his phone, scanning the QR code on our table in order to sign up for karaoke. Everyone at the applauded and hooted, glad that someone else was signing up to do what most of us were too much of cowards to actually do.

I wasn’t sure why, but the way Charlie had said it… I felt that pulse of arousal. I wasn’t visualizing Charlie dancing on a stage in a thong or anything. But for whatever reason, the word association of ‘Charlie’ and ‘burlesque’ made me feel like I had every morning for the past two weeks: burning with the need to rub one out.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom.” I squeezed Charlie’s thigh. “I’ll be back before you go up.”

“I’ll go with you.” Danielle said, sliding off her stool and wobbling on uncertain feet. Just great. I nodded and helped guide Danielle to the bathroom. Unable to get myself into a stall and masturbate while the drunk Danielle raved about how she wasn’t drunk, I splashed my face with cold water. I really hoped Charlie wanted sex tonight, because I would never have even considered masturbating in a bar bathroom before. I adjusted my boobs in the top to show off a bit more cleavage, hoping I could make Charlie riled up, too.

The night had been fun, it was nice to meet some new people as well. Though all of them were about ten years younger than us, they still made us feel welcome and interesting. I was grateful to Kai for organizing the night. Charlie had been right, it was good to be out of the house and making friends.

The cold water had helped, but hadn’t solved the problem. However, wanting to watch Charlie sing, I hurried Danielle out of the bathroom and back to the table, where Frankie was explaining the work he was doing on his car. After a few minutes, Charlie’s name was called and he started towards the stage as we clapped and whooped. Charlie was a theater kid, so his usual karaoke songs were either showtunes or jazz standards. So my surprise was noticeable when Brittany Spears’ Toxic started playing.

His eyes locked onto me with a lidded gaze, as if drunk, and he started singing. His hips dipped and he began dancing like a stripper, much to the audience’s delight. Thrusts, struts, hair tosses, all of it garnered laughs and ironic cheers from the bar who thought it hilarious. But he was singing to me. His hands rubbed along his body, challenging me. He winked and curled his finger to call me forward. And when the song was over, he got all red and embarrassed as everyone started cheering, timidly putting the mic back on the stand and coming back to the table. Everyone clapped and laughed, but he came over to me for a hug, which I ensured his head went to my cleavage for.

“What do you think, Gina? Do I have what it takes?”

Gina laughed. “You could use some dance lessons, but you’re a definite crowd pleaser.”

***

When we got home, I immediately went to the bedroom, changing into the sexiest lingerie I could find. The stockings, the garter, the panties, they all fit perfectly. But again, my bra. All of them were tight. Even the one I’d worn to the bar had left red marks on my boobs. But that meant that once I did get them clasped, my boobs spilled out of them in a way I hoped was sexy.

Charlie had gone to the guest bathroom, telling me not to wait up, though I did. I waited. And then waited. And waited with my hand down my panties. And waited while tapping my clit, just to keep the mood up. And then after an hour, I gave up on waiting, grabbing my vibrator and buzzing out an orgasm. I opened the clasp on my bra as I fell back into the bed, unwilling to tolerate the discomfort any longer. I needed to reassess my diet if I was gaining fat after starting at the gym, again.

I had wanted to stay up and talk with Charlie, but I was quite tired and did not think he would be coming to bed. Maybe I tried too hard. Maybe he liked teasing me.

I awoke with a soft hand on my face and a kiss on my cheek. Gentle. Always gentle. It was pitch black in the room, save for the red numbers on my alarm clock. 3:42.

“Now.” Charlie whispered, voiceless. His gentle hand running reverently on my abs, which were slick with sweat.

“Ungh?” I moaned, unsure of what he was saying at first. But then I felt a hot, rigid piece of flesh poke my ass cheeks. “Oh, now!” My mind jolted awake, jumpstarting the heat between my legs. I yanked my bra off and made quick work of my panties, too. “Yes, fuck me. Anyway you want it. I need you.”

I pushed my rear back up into his hips, eyes rolling at the feeling of his hard cock hotdogging my ass. He was shaved smooth, no hair rubbing against my skin. When my back rubbed against his chest, I found it smooth, too. Charlie had always been hairy.

“Get on top, be cuddly and smothering.” He said in the same breathy whisper. “Take control, but be gentle.” He didn’t have to tell me twice. I rolled over, throwing my leg over his body, moaning at the touch of our skin.

“You shaved.” I said, leaning through the darkness to kiss my lover’s face, finding his beard gone as well. Was that what took him so long? I lowered one hand to his cock, gently guiding the throbbing thing to my quivering pussy, afraid that if I waited, he’d change his mind. “Yes…” I hissed, rocking my hips back to push him inside me, body sliding against his. Both hands now free, I buried my face into his shoulder, lips kissing his neck as I rubbed my whole self up and down his body, trying to maximize skin contact. I took his hands in mine, interlocking our fingers. “Fuck.”

I tried my best to be gentle, rocking slowly despite everything inside me screaming to sit straight up and bounce like I was riding a galloping horse. Gentle, he’d asked. And his whimpers and shakes told me I was doing it right. “C-call me your good girl.”

I didn’t freeze up, but my pace definitely slowed. Had I heard him, correctly? The sudden tension I felt in his hands and the warmth in his cheeks told me of the embarrassment I couldn’t see in the darkness. I’d heard him right. I was surprised, but did not want to stop to talk about it. We were having sex and I wasn’t going to stop it.

“Good girl.” I resumed my pace, being hit by a surprise lightning bolt of excitement. Fuck, I seemed to like that, too. Charlie moaned under me, quivering like a helpless little… “Such a fucking good girl…” I couldn’t help but pick up my pace a little.

His breath shallowed and he started thrusting in time with me. It was like riding lightning. “Yeah, you like that, baby?” I pulled out of one of his hands, running my fingers through his hair. He whimpered as an answer. “You’ve been such a good girl.” I stuck my tongue into his mouth, being met with the first real french kiss we’d shared in almost two years. After a few minutes I could feel the tension. The jerkiness of his hips, the curling of his toes. “Be a good girl and cum, ok?” I kissed his neck, drunk off the passion. “Cum for mommy, babygirl.”

Mommy!?

Where the fuck did Mommy come from?

Charlie spasmed under me, moaning and writhing. “Y-yes, mommy!” Fuck it, we were rolling with it. I spread my knees, lowering myself further onto his wriggling body. He wanted a cuddle-fuck, so I smothered him while his dick jerked inside me. One hand tightened around his, the other slid behind his head, pushing his face between my small breasts. My bouncing turned into hip rolling and I started to feel warm spurts inside me.

“Good girl.” I chuckled, nibbling his ear. “Good babygirl…”

“I’m sorry—“

“Shshshh.”

“—if this was weird.”

“Ssshhhhhh babygirl. We can talk in the morning. But right now, Mommy wants to cuddle with her good girl, ok?” I cooed into his ear, laying on top of him and laying gentle kisses into his ear as I felt him begin to slowly slide out of me. “Aw, getting soft.” I mused, rubbing our cheeks together. There was a pulse. “Guess I spoke too soon.”