Nostalgic visits

I was assaulted by incessant nightmares during the night. One was about that night I fought Aurora. I could vividly remember the pain from the stabbing, the terror I felt as, for the first time in my life, I was truly in danger of dying. I faced bullies and thugs time and time again before, and at most risked bruises and some cuts. They were assholes, but never intended to kill me. Unlike Aurora.

Another, less awful dream I had was of me wearing the cute waitress I met yesterday and simply enjoying her life, adoring being inside her skin. The other dreams alternated between dread of being hunted and ecstasy of being a pretty girl.

Due to all these nightmares, I woke up multiple times during the night, and as such, barely slept. I already was less energetic than normal yesterday, but it only got worse.

I took a look at my appearance in the small bathroom's mirror. My skin was sickly pale, my veins clearly visible underneath, and my eyes were red. I looked like I hadn't slept or seen the sun in weeks. I already hated my bland reflection this past month, but it was also getting worse. Despite the leather jacket and thick jeans I was wearing, I kept shivering. Never in my life had I felt so cold, even my muscles and bones were freezing. The curse was punishing me for resisting until now. It wanted me to yield.

I need to wear someone soon… I don't know how long I can still last… I dejectedly sighed.

But I was scared… Scared of losing myself again, like what happened when I wore Sarah, Carmen, and Rowana. The curse completely took me over back then. Being them was the most powerful high I'd ever experienced, I didn't believe myself strong enough to resist the temptation again should I give in…

In the end, I decided against rushing things about my parents. I was now back to my hometown, I could take my **** on my father whenever I wanted. First, I simply wished to enjoy the nostalgia. It has been four years since I last was here, after all. I wanted to visit the comic book store Claire and I spent so much time and money at, the gym I frequented almost every afternoon after high-school, the cafe Claire loved… I still had a bit of money saved, I could search for a job and a proper place to stay later. And find how to quench my ever-growing urges too.

After a barebone and tasteless breakfast, I left the motel, driving towards the cafe first. I needed something better to fill my hungry stomach before doing anything else.

I was pleasantly surprised to see that not much has changed in four years, the exterior looking exactly the same way I remembered it. I sat inside and ordered a hot cappuccino and a chocolate donut. I couldn't recognise any of the waiters, but it was to be expected. Most waiters around here were high-school and college students, they never stayed more than a few years.

My eyes kept being drawn to the cute waitresses working there, in their pretty uniforms. My skinwalker side was salivating at the idea of slipping into one of them, my mind overwhelmed by all kinds of fantasies, from mundane to deeply erotic.

But like before, I felt absolutely no desire when I focused on the male waiters. No urge whatsoever. Only massive discomfort at the idea of becoming another man, my body shivering slightly more. Was I feeling dysphoria?

I covered my face with my hands and quietly groaned at the curse. Why are you feeling like this about men? A skin is a skin, right? Why won't you be satisfied with a man's skin?

I tried my best to ignore these feelings for the time being, eating and drinking my proper breakfast. Even the piping hot cappuccino wasn't able to do anything about the freezing cold. But it was nonetheless nice to enjoy this place's delicacies again after so long. They made really good pastries and drinks.

Afterwards, I decided to walk to the comic book store. It'd take longer than driving, but I wanted to enjoy the nostalgic scenery more. A few stores have been replaced by new ones, some buildings had a new coat of paint, but most of the district was as I recalled.

The store also didn't change at all. Walking inside, I was greeted by a familiar face. The owner was still there, albeit with a little less hair, and he was surprised to see me again after so long. He commented on my sickly appearance, but I brushed it off, telling him I just had a hard time sleeping recently and would get better soon. I enjoyed talking to him about new releases like I used to as a teen, gushing over the latest Spiderman or Batman stories. It was as if I'd never left.

I bought a new book and decided to walk towards my former high-school. Even if this place held a lot of bad memories, I also had a few fond ones. I never had many friends, but I had a sweet girlfriend back then. Alicia was a cheerleader, but unlike her more bitchy teammates, she was kind and gentle, in addition to being gorgeous and muscular. The two of us dated for a few months until we finished high-school and she moved to another state.

Remembering her was awakening my skinwalker side again… Being her would be so wonderful… Having her toned abs, her cute dyed blonde hair, her pretty smile… Having fun as a fit and lean cheerleader, jumping around and encouraging the football team…

I shook my head. Stop that… Leave me alone, dammit…

The school was obviously empty, considering it was Sunday, but it hasn't changed much either. It was a religious school, and as such, the education there was extremely strict, and honestly backward in quite a few aspects. Only a handful of students and teachers could be considered truly nice and open-minded. Like my former PE teacher, Steven, who was a pretty nice and chill guy. Or my Philosophy teacher, Ms. Turner, on whom I had quite a crush back then.

Again, my mind became filled with fantasies of slipping inside her pretty skin, wearing her elegant outfits and teaching classes as her. It wasn't even that hard to imagine how I'd feel, considering how much I loved the day I spent teaching as Sarah… It'd be such a thrill.

Argh… Stop tempting me!

I dove into a small alleyway nearby to try to calm down and avoid looking at potential cute women passing by. I didn't need more temptation. I could feel the desperation and longing from the curse. It was growing stronger and stronger.

“Oy, is that you, Edward?” A male voice asked from behind me, surprising me.

Turning around, I was greeted by a face I somehow recognised even though it was now sporting a thick goatee and a shaved head. It was Kyle, a former bully I sometimes fought and put back in his place back then. His arms and neck were tattooed all over, and he had a big sports bag laying next to him.

He grinned. “It is you. Lookin’ like a shitty zombie, though.”

I didn't like the malicious glint in his eyes, so I stayed cautious. “Didn't expect to see you, Kyle. Why are you here? You felt nostalgic about school too?”

It made him snicker. “As if. Fuck school. Especially since ya got me expelled.”

At that, he took a step closer. He still clearly held a grudge. His eyes were vicious.

“Well, if you hadn't been such an ass with people, it wouldn't have happened. You can only blame yourself,” I replied with a smirk.

His fists clenched. “Unlike you, I didn't have a powerful mommy to shelter me.”

What he said took me aback. “What are you talking about? My mother never cared about me.”

It was this moment he chose to punch me in the face. “She's the only reason you didn't get expelled too, motherfucker!”

His punch was strong and made me recoil. I spit out a little bit of blood as I regained my composure and punched him back, sending him against the wall.

“You want another ass kicking after so long? I'll gladly give you one,” I snickered, cracking my knuckles. “I needed something to vent my frustration onto anyway.”

He rushed at me, but he was so sloppy compared to Aurora. He was no threat whatsoever. I effortlessly dodged and blocked his punches and kicks, and quickly countered with more punches of my own.

“Bastard…” He muttered, tiring out.

I saw him pick something up from his pocket, a butterfly knife. Seeing it, memories of my fight against Aurora resurfaced. The immense pain of being stabbed and the fear of dying were still vivid in my mind.

He tried to cut me with it, grazing my arm as I evaded it. I couldn't toy with him any longer, he became too dangerous. We seemed alone in that alleyway, so I decided to free my spines and stab him, quickly pumping the liquid inside him while covering his mouth to prevent any screaming as he deflated, terror and shock showing on his face. In one last ditch effort, he slashed my hand, but the cut wasn't deep. He lost too much strength already to be able to do anything.

Finally, only an empty husk remained as I fully absorbed his soul, some warmth flaring up within me, weak but comforting nonetheless. I quickly grabbed his skin and stuff and hid behind a dumpster. I panted heavily, catching my breath. I didn't expect to fight someone on my first day back.

I glanced at Kyle's skin, wondering what to do. I needed a skin to satiate these ever growing urges, I could wear him, and it wasn't like he didn't deserve it. He attacked me first, after all, and he clearly was still an asshole…

But the same disgust I felt earlier with the male waiters manifested itself again. I had a strong suspicion I wouldn't really enjoy being in his skin…