No Need For A Genius

Breathing deep in anticipation of whatever weird things may greet her, Kiyone opened the door to Washu's lab. TO her surprise, she found only Washu herself working on her computer while Ryo-Oh-Ki dashed around, chasing a carrot on a string attached to her forehead. Kiyone giggled at her.

Washu: Hey there, Kiyone! I never thought you'd come visit me!

Kiyone: Oh? I-i guess i don't see you in here as often as the others, do i? Sorry...

Washu: Don't sweat it, kid! C'mon i... Uh, you didn't bring Mihoshi with you, did you?

Kiyone: No.

Washu: C'mon in! Sit down, have some tea, fresh from the gene-splicing tank!

Kiyone: Ehhh, nno, that's ok. Actually, i need your advice.

Washu: Oh!? On what?

Kiyone: Um....W-washu, you said you were married before, right?

Washu: Mm-hmm! Consummated an' everything!

Kiyone: Right...do you...do you remember how you attracted him to you?

Washu: Let's see. It was a long time ago, but it seems like i may have tampered with his brain. Or maybe he hated me, so i pulled his copy from a parallel dimension....Anyway, why do you ask?

Kiyone: Nevermind. Thanks anyway.

She started to leave but stopped upon hearing Washu's wicked realization chuckle.

Kiyone: Wh-what is it?

Washu: You wanna be Tenchi's valentine too, don't you?

Kiyone: WHAT!? N-no! I...I...sigh yes....

Washu: I thought so! Why're ya askin' me how to do it?

Kiyone: I'm...not that experienced with...you know, seduction, so...

Washu: Oh, you don't need experience!

Kiyone: I don't?

Washu: Naw! You just need to follow these three rules. First, ya gotta have 'it'.

Kiyone: It?

Washu snapped her fingers and a pair of metallic arms pulled Kiyone's shirt up and her pants down, leaving her in her white bra and panties. She shrieked.

Washu: Oh, yeah, you got it, alright! Step two, show it. Check on that too!

Kiyone: W-WASHU!! What're you doing!?

Washu: Just givin' ya a little confidence is all! And the third thing ya gotta do is shake it! You can dance, right?

Kiyone: Not really.

Washu: Hmm. Can you dodge lasers?

Kiyone: Well, yes.

Washu: Ok! Show me how you'd dodge one coming toward your spine from the side!

Kiyone: Huh?

Washu pressed a button and a laser fired at the small of Kiyone's back from the left side. She arched her back, which made her chest and hips stick out, avoiding the blast.

Washu: Yeah! Do that in front of Tenchi, and he'll love it!

Kiyone: Dodge a shot?

Washu, sheepishly: Maybe eventually. No, i mean stick out your T and A! Make sure he notices them, and everything'll be great, ok?

Kiyone: You-you really think so?

Washu: He's a man, isn't he? Trust me! Now go on! Go get Tenchi, ya crazy kid! And let me know how it goes, 'kay?

Kiyone: O-okay.

Kiyone left Washu's lab, feeling a bit more confident. She went toward the field where Tenchi was working, gaining more and more faith in her body as she went.

Kiyone, thinking: Maybe Washu's right! I guess maybe i do have kind of a nice body. Maybe i can win Tenchi's heart with it! Yeah! I know i can! Hmm? Oh, hi, Lady Sasami!

Sasami: .........

Kiyone: Hm?

Sasami: K-Kiyone? Um...are you proud of your underwear?

Kiyone: Eh?

Sasami pointed shyly at her body, which she'd forgotten was half naked. Her entire body went crimson as she ran back to Washu's door.

Kiyone: WASHUUUU!!! GIMME BACK MY CLOTHES!!!

Washu: Heh-heh! A full minute before she noticed. She really is getting obsessed with Tenchi!